Just Because We Can
Just because we have the Freedom to say something, that doesn’t mean we should. The entire world doesn’t need to know every thought we have. Having the ability to say something is one thing. But at what cost? Did that comment make you feel bigger or better about yourself? Did popping the other person’s bubble make more room for you?
I see so much bitterness being spewed on TV, social media, and really any media in general. Hell, people are spewing hate faster than a lighting bolt. It almost feels like a social norm now. Everywhere we turn issues and the need to be right/heard are dividing us. I am not making light of the issues by any means. Some of these issues are life altering.
But not every action, every issue, or every conversation needs to be made into a huge deal. And for the love of everybody can we please stop correcting people on everything. Who cares if someone used the wrong tense of a verb. Who cares if a person’s outfit doesn’t match. Not every situation in life needs to be a teaching moment. Last I checked we were all human beings. AKA – not perfect. We are gonna screw-up. It is inevitable. How about handing out, or better yet, throwing around some Grace. For all sides involved.
Ultimately the driving force behind the issues is meant to divide us. To keep us separated and keep us from talking. If we can stay pissed off at each other, then we don’t communicate. When we don’t communicate, we can never resolve any issues. Therefore I suggest that if you want to shout from the rooftops, than you must also sit and listen while the next person shouts from the rooftops. If we could acknowledge that when we take all the issues away there is one simple truth, and that is that we are all more alike than we are different. That statement right there scares the hell out of us. ‘Cause no matter what issue is at the top of your list, you never want to be compared to the exact opposite of what your issue is.
If we could get back to the basics of actually sitting down and talking problems out, can you imagine the resolutions that we could come to? What if we actually listened to the words coming out of people’s mouth. Instead, we react out of our own fear and distrust. Which in turn gets us nowhere.
Instead of moving us closer to common ground, we lash out using the weapon that we have the least amount of control. Our mouths! Once those words leave our lips, they might as well have been posted on the internet. Those words are there to stay and there is no taking them back. No matter how bad we want to.
When someone says something to me that stings, I have learned to move myself back away from the situation, and evaluate. I am a hot head. Speak first, think second, regret last. Not a good situation to be in. Unfortunately, I think most people fall in the same category. When in reality we need to bite our tongue, apply a little bit of Bergamot Essential Oil, count to 10, (my case 100) and take a few deep breaths before we utter the first word.
If you are anything like me, we have to stop thinking with our hearts and start using our minds. Damn, that is a hard one. I take everything personal. I didn’t get the memo that explains the world doesn’t revolve around me. Sorry! We think with our minds and feel with our hearts. I can not begin to tell you how many times I let my heart do the thinking that my mind was supposed to process. Trust me when I say it only cause confusion and frustration. For all parties involved.
I do not think that the vast majority of people in this world are mean spirited. I do believe with all my heart there are more good people in this world than there are bad.
As we go into the month of July and continue to celebrate our Freedoms, that were bought and paid for, be fair and kind. Remember to treat people the way you want to be treated. There is enough ugliness in the world to last a lifetime, so let’s bring Joy and Hope. Most importantly, just because we have the freedom to say what we what to say under the Freedom of Speech Act, doesn’t mean we need to say it. If the words can’t bring us together, bring encouragement to the table, provide love, them leave them outside in the trash.
Book: For The Love: Jen Hatmaker
– Michelle Haman