In just a few short years, Steve Byrne has risen through the ranks of the comedy world to become one of the industry’s most innovative and sought-after performers. With his high-energy, physical style of comedy, Byrne has evolved throughout the years into an extremely versatile entertainer that delivers on a day-to-day basis.

What’s going on these days?  You’ve got a TV show coming out on TBS this fall.  How’s that going?

Well, it’s not official.  We trying a pilot, so I’ll find out in three weeks if it’s going or not.  Hopefully we did enough work and we’re happy with it and they’re happy with it.  We’ll see. 

Was the sit-com pilot your idea or was it proposed to you to develop?

It was initially my idea and I was lucky enough to work on it with some good friends – Vince Vaughn and Peter Billingsley.  I got teamed up with a great writer, Rob Long who worked on Cheers for many years.  Collectively the four of us really hammered home what I initially thought about.  We improved on it and made it better.  I think we turned in a really, really good show. 

Are you a little nervous about it?  With standup you now immediately what the crowd thinks and can adjust to your crowd.  Whereas on TV you have to wait until it airs. 

Yeah, it’s a little nerve-wracking, but we do film the show in front of a live audience, so we did get that instant reaction.  If I were to base it on what we did that day in front of that audience I think we did a pretty good job. 

What made you want to become a comedian initially?

Actually, in college I was in college in Ohio and I went to New York City and I was just looking to get an odd job to get by until I figured out what I was going to do.  And I got a job at a comedy club, just working there answering phones, sweeping floors taking reservations. I started watching a lot of standup comedy.  And I said to myself that seemed like a lot of fun.  I’d like to try it sometime.  I found another local club up the street and I went there.  The first night I tried it I absolutely knew – I walked off stage saying I knew this is what I wanted to do for the rest of my life.  I didn’t know you could make a real living out of it.  I just knew I was going to do that.  Whatever it took, I was going to do it.

There are many avenues you can go with standup – political, observational or prop.  What brought you about to your brand of comedy?

When I first started off I was a lot more observational and high energy and I think that was in lieu of the fact I wasn’t the most prolific writer.  Over the last five years I’ve focused more on writing, and so my stuff has gone from some silly goofy observations to a little bit of observational comedy, but a lot of it is rooted in how we view each other as Americans and I base a lot of my comedy on identity now because being Korean and Irish I never felt that I fit in one center or the other, so I looked at myself as American.  I started looking and everybody’s American and I based my comedy off of that.

I’ve seen your act a few times and have heard you talk of your Korean background.  Do you talk much about your Irish side?

When I started off more of it was about being Korean and Irish, but now I try not to  be exclusive to one particular group.  I try to be inclusive of everybody. And I thought the best way to do that was to look at everybody as one – as Americans and that’s kind of where my comedy is at right now.

Do you think everybody is fair game?

Oh yeah.  Absolutely – almost too much of it.  There are people that take exception to it, but at the end of the day I hope they know my comedy is coming from a good place and one that’s just trying to be unifying.

You’ve had some interesting tours opening up for some musical acts like Mariah Carey and Kanye West.  What is it like mixing comedy with a music crowd?

It sucks. (laughs) I don’t know how else to say it.  It’s absolutely one of the worst.  It’s like putting peanut butter and spaghetti together.  I don’t know why people choose to do it, but I’ve always done well with it.  I’ve survived and gotten a descent response out of it, but it’s just something I prefer not to do.  Early in my career I was doing that, but now I don’t need to do those things.  It was fun.  It was a great learning experience, but one I would choose not to have again. 

You’re a big fan of the band Oasis.  How have you taken the split that occurred over the last year into the two different entities we have now?

It sucks.  It’s like when your favorite band breaks up.  It stinks and then they go off and do solo projects.  And you say I wish these guys had stuck together.  That’s why it’s kind of refreshing that Van Halen got together and I’m listening to them.  It kind of reminds me – everybody has that one band or one song in particular that reminds them of being younger.  Oasis was one of those things for me from my college life and going into my early 20s.  It’s always a romanticized period for me for my music.

Do you feel like you have to choose sides between the two Gallagher brothers now or do you just keep your head down?  You know, kind of like a child of divorce in a way. 

(laughs) I try not to ruffle both feathers.  I listen to both sides with equal ears, but if I had to go one way or the other I would go with Noel. 

I also understand you’re a big fan of Dean Martin.  Taking that into consideration, who would be a part of your “rat pack”?

Oh my god, my own personal rat pack?  I kind of had it when I filmed the pilot.  Because when I filmed the pilot I had written specifically some roles towards some comics that I had either seen or that I was friends with.  That benefited the comedy as well.  When I went ahead and filmed it I was fortunate enough to bring these guys in and really, really fortunate enough that TBS and Warner and everybody else involved with it saw there was some chemistry with these guys and went forward with casting them.  So Roy Wood, Jr., Owen Benjamin – they’re just battling great comics that are friends.  If the show does get picked up they’re definitely guys I would tour with in the future and I would definitely love to.  So that would be my own personal rat pack. 

You’ve done a lot of touring overseas and around the country.  Do you enjoy the grind of being on the road or do you prefer to be in a more stable environment?

I’ve always considered myself a comedian first, so touring is part of it.  At the end of the day you’re in a hotel room like most of the day and then you perform for an hour or two each night.  It’s just the touring and waiting that really becomes the aspect of work.  But when you’re on stage performing that’s when it’s all worth it-that instant reaction – that something positive in trying to make people laugh – that’s your job.  It’s a pretty good job.  There’s not really much to complain about when you’re touring. 

You’re not a very political person.  Do election years kind of drive you crazy?

I think my own personal life I’m sort of political.  I try not to be apathetic.  I try to keep up on everything, but I think as a comedian we invest so much time in material that if I was political and was more topical all the jokes I have have a shelf life of maybe three months or shorter depending on the jokes.  I’ve always tried to be a little more broad and go with topics that are more evergreen.  Somebody could put my DVD in ten years from now and still laugh at it and not get any of the jokes.  That’s why I’ve always strayed away from being to political or topical. 

Are you constantly writing all the time, taking notes when you’re out and about?

As a comic you’ve always got your eyes open a little wider and your ears open.  Everything is going on around you because you never know when a joke is going to come to you.  I am one of those comics who, if you come and see me once a year you’ll always see at least a 60 percent new act because I’m constantly writing.  I’m getting ready for my third special.  I’ve been trying to so a special every two years.  When I get done with that one I go ahead to the next one.  Something I’ve been trying to keep up with, a little goal for myself.  Writing is a huge part of standup but I’ve never rested on a one hour special.  I always wanted to continue to improve and be a better comic and be the best comic I can be. Some jokes you do write are absolutely awesome, some jokes absolutely suck, some jokes you write you say this is going to put me on the map and then it bombs.  And other jokes you write you think are going to suck and it becomes a great joke and you go off on three or four different tangents.  That’s the crazy thing about it.  You never know.  The only way to know is to test it out on that audience every single night and hope to god you get that clearance and mold it into something.

If you find yourself with a difficult audience do you have a joke that you pull out to try and get the crowd back on your side?

Yeah.  There’s always some tricks in the bag, but one of the things I’ve always enjoyed was when the material isn’t going well, you’re having that off night which happens to everybody, I really enjoy diving into the crowd and doing some crowd work.  That’s something I really enjoyed when I was in New York City.  For example I would do six or seven shows a night I would dedicate one of those sections to having new material and go after the crowd work.  It’s something I always enjoyed doing and something that has gotten me out of a lot of jams.  Then usually the last 15 minutes I do something more based in sex and those jokes usually do pretty well. (laughs)

You’ve gotten to live your dream of being a standup comedian.  What’s the best thing about being a standup comedian?

The fact that the sole purpose of my occupation is to go up on a stage in front of a group of strangers and getting an emotional response that’s positive – laughter.  I simply have one goal up there – to make them smile, to make them forget about what’s going on earlier in the day if they had a bad day.  Just to make them laugh for an hour and for one hour to make them laugh, to bring them a little joy makes me very, very happy.  It’s just such a positive job.  I feel very fortunate, very blessed that I get to do this for a living.  I wouldn’t change anything about it.

 - Dave Weinthal

Steve Byrne appears at the Comedy Catch Thursday through Sunday.  For tickets and more information go to thecomedycatch.com.

Matt Lewis is a man of many hats.  Some say he’s a magician.  Over the past decade he has become a local success story.  From his beginnings as a restaurant manager for one of the local chains here he has opened and juggled the responsibilities of running and overseeing three popular, yet diverse restaurant/pubs downtown, the latest of which, The Honest Pint celebrates its first anniversary as 2011 comes to a close.

It’s hard to miss Matt.  Actually it’s hard to pin him down.  During the past decade he along with his business partners have opened Hair of the Dog, Terminal Brewhouse and now the Honest Pint.  The building that houses the Honest Pint has a long history in Chattanooga’s nightlife.  For 18 years it was Parkway Billiards, before, to the surprise of many, it closed its doors in late spring of 2010.  Before it was Parkway Billiards it had been many a venue of varying themes.  At one time or another it served as the home for Timothy’s Staircase, Alan Gold’s, Paty’s Place, Meindani’s, Miss Kitty’s, Shooter’s and probably a dozen before it settled down as a billiard hall.

The architecture of the building inside is phenomenal with multiple large crystal chandeliers, intricate woodwork and three stories in height.  It has been the host of many celebrity sightings and performances including early MTV bands the Romantics and the Producers back when they were in vogue.

Parkway Billiards was Lewis and his partner Ryan Chilcoat’s little hideaway.  They would meet there to get away from their other two businesses, talk and have a beer.  Parkway owner Gaye Paty contacted the two of them when she decided she was going to retire from the business.  “Since we already had a relationship, she kind of knew what we were all about,” Lewis says.  “I think it kind of gave her a little peace of mind to hand it over to somebody that she knew would do something good with it, not just reopen it and ride the coattails of Parkway.”

With the success of Hair of the Dog and Terminal Brewhouse Lewis and Chilcoat had no problem in securing financial backing to convert the three-story billiard hall into an Irish pub.  “We jumped at the chance to do something here because we both love the space so much,” says Lewis.  As much as they hated to see the old Parkway go, they look forward to continuing its legacy as the Honest Pint.

Owning three restaurant/pubs within a few miles of each other can be a slippery slope.  Careful not to cancel out each other, Lewis and company have managed to carve out three distinctive locations.  While there is a little overlap between them here and there, for the most part each has been able to maintain a separate identity.  “I think one thing is that conceptually, although they’re [Hair of the Dog and Honest Pint] both pubs – European style pubs, there’s enough of an atmosphere and certainly menu differences,” says Lewis.  One thing that differentiates the Honest Pint from his other places is that they offer live music.  “Having the venue side of things kind of separates it from anything else that we do,” he says.

Lewis says he’s happy the way things are right now. Chattanooga is mid-sized city and three different venues downtown is enough.  It allows him and his management team to keep sane while not stretching them out too thin to cover too many locations.  His approach was purely methodical.  With Hair of the Dog it took him two years to get his infrastructure in place and the right people on staff before he considered his next step, opening the Terminal Brewhouse.  Almost two years later the Honest Pint opened its doors.  “A big part of it is having people that work with you that kind of get your vision and get how seriously we take what we’re doing and can facilitate that on a day-to-day basis.”

In today’s day and age the term “Irish pub” has taken on a generic meaning.  Just because you have Guinness on tap and hang four leaf clovers all over the bar, doesn’t really make you an Irish pub.  “Well, the difference to me between an Irish pub and just a pub is live music,” says Lewis.  “If you go to Ireland you’ll see a majority of those places have some sort of live music involved, whether it’s a full band or just a guy with an acoustic guitar singing old Irish tunes.”  Depending on the night of the week and location of the pub  you’re bound to find live music of some sort.

The Honest Pint has taken that to what might be considered an American level by having a complete sound system and making it more of a concert venue.  Also offered is a heavily Irish-influenced menu, while not completely traditionally Irish, there are certain items on the menu that are.  “Our business model is based o taking traditional ideas, traditional concepts and modernizing them,” says Lewis.   There are several Irish beers on tap as well as probably the largest selection of Irish whiskey offered in town.

Besides juggling three locations Lewis finds himself juggling many duties at Honest Pint including the musical side of things.  Honest Pint offers live music regularly three nights a week – Wednesday, Thursday and Sunday, with an occasional Friday or Saturday show for a bigger act. The musicians that are featured at the Honest Pint range from local artists to rising regional artists.  Many are on their way up and this may be the only time you see some of these bands perform in this intimate of an atmosphere.

Part of the balancing act Lewis does at the Honest Pint is the scheduling of the bands on nights that aren’t traditional music nights at other venues.  Besides, he knows his core crowd on the weekend is more of a pub crowd, there to drink and enjoy conversation, not necessarily to listen to live music.  Live music fills the void in nights that are not pub-oriented.  A considerably lower admission price than other venues is charged ($3) except on special shows making it hard for even the biggest scrooge not to come in.  The lower admission price helps the bands develop a loyal following.  Some were reluctant at first with the low cover price, but it was explained to them it was better to ger more people in there paying less the having less people paying more.  In the long run the philosophy will work to the advantage of the artist.  “I’ve got a much better understanding of how it all works now since we’ve been doing it for a year,” he says.  “I feel like cultureally we;er headed in the right direction.  I think we’re a little limited by our size, but I think it’s definitely a growing part of Chattanooga.”

Many a major act has performed on stage at the Honest Pint.  The grand opening last New Year’s Eve featured Jason isbell and the 400 Unit.  Isbell was one of the main songwriters early on for the seminal southern rock band Drive-By Truckers before venturing out on his own.  Recently Unknown Hinson performed there and this New Year’s Eve the Features will be headlining with the Bohannons.  The Features rose to prominence around 2005 getting a lot of national airplay before peaking.  Still one of the most popular southern acts (they hail from Sparta), their latest album has received glowing reviews from the major magazines and music websites.  “I think it’s going to be a great night,” says Lewis.  “I think the people who haven’t seen the Features or who aren’t aware of who they are, it’s going to be a unique opportunity to see them because I do really think they’re going to get bigger than they are now, which will mean they probably won’t play venues like this much any more.  He credits Marty Bohannon with helping book show.  Bohannon has been booking New Year’s Eve shows at the venue for the past ten years.

Lewis has seen a lot in the first year the Honest Pint has been open.  One of the more memorable moments was the pub’s first St. Patrick’s day.  It was busy.  The place was crawling with pub-crawlers, revelers and a non-stop stream of patrons. “I just remember somebody coming in and going, ‘Hey, you know you’ve got a line going down to Midtown?’” he recalls.  He looked out the door in disbelief and sure enough, there was a line that went down to the other end of the parkway.  “Stuff like that, you look around in a room of 300 people and there’s 100 more waiting to get in.  That’s pretty awesome.”

After being around six or seven months Lewis thinks, that’s when the Honest Pint hit its groove.  “We’re in that groove now,” he says.  “As a business we’re doing a much more consistent job – food-wise, quality-wise, service-wise,” 

As the Honest Pint begins year number two Lewis foresees smooth sailing.  “The second year tends to be bittersweet for restaurants,” he says.  “I guess you’re still in that somewhat of a honeymoon phase, so to speak, but sales tend to level off and that’s the best time for us because what happens is we develop a sensibility where we know who our regulars are and we continue to build our that regular client base.”

The curiosity thing is still there for some people.  “We never think we’re going to be everybody’s favorite place,” says Lewis.  The place kind of regulates itself to capacity.  Those that aren’t smokers or are there to eat know pretty much when to be there as well as those how are in the mood to hear live music and those that aren’t.  They can plan accordingly.  “From a business perspective, it’s a much more comfortable time.”

 - Dave Weinthal

The Features will perform on New Year’s Even at the Honest Pint located at 33 Patten Parkway.  Opening the show will be the Bohannons.

It’s all in a day’s work for Walter Lindsey.  Whether guarding a VIP, flying to a foreign country to investigate an international investment, fact checking or keeping an eye on perhaps you, it’s just another day at the office for him.  Walter Lindsey is a private investigator and owner of Professional Consulting & Investigations (PCI) in Chattanooga.

Stern, professional and proficient, Lindsey defies the stereotype most PIs have garnered over the years thank to movies, television and pop culture.  In many ways he’s like a James Bond except his services are open to the general public, not just her majesty.

There’s more to being a private investigator than checking on cheating spouses, missing property, cheap suits and dimly lit corner offices.  Lindsey’s firm operates downtown and his business takes him all around the world and back.  Looking at him you know he’s all business and well-traveled.

What is a private investigator or detective anyway?  A private investigator is someone who is hired by a private individual(s) or business as a detective to collect evidence.  Compared to a police investigator whose caseload can be overwhelming, a private investigator can be focused on one or two cases.

While there are more than a handful of PIs in the Chattanooga area, Lindsey’s disciplined background led him to the business.  He began his career in the Air Force where he worked his way to Special Investigations.  He did that until about ten years ago and moved back home to Chattanooga.  “I had a desire to continue investigating but didn’t necessarily want to go with the police department or other federal agencies,” he say. 

At the same time, he didn’t want the experience he gained being an agent go to waste, so he decided to use it in the private sector.

Making a good impression is important for those in Lindsey’s line of work.  Like any other business it relies on referrals.  Do a thorough job and make the client happy and you’ll keep their business and they will tell others.  Screw up, and they’ll do the same.  “Training in and of itself is one of the most vital things in the PI field,” he says.  “But a lot of times you have to get out there and get it yourself.”

The primary difference between a PI and an investigator on the federal, or police department level is that a private investigator works for a private individual or company, while the federal or police department detective works for the state and the government.  A private detective has more time to devote to their cases than a police detective.  A PI may have three or more cases going on at a time, while the police detective at any given time in buried under upward a hundred or more cases.  “Whereas a private investigator can be more focuses on one or two cases at a time,” he says.  “Our level of proof is different.  We get the client and find out what they’re looking for and we go out and address those issues.”  Lindsey can take time working on his cases whereas a detective will find himself splitting his time on dozens of cases at all times.

The relationship between the police department and private investigators are pretty good.  It should be understood that a PI does not have arresting authority.  While not an extension of the police department but there are times they can help out on a criminal defense cases and information leads them to a culprit in a sense that it exonerates their client,  “The police will be more than happy to accept the assistance we’re giving them,” Lindsey says.  “I don’t ever think I’ve been considered a pain in the butt by any agency that we have on occasion run into.”

Thanks to movies and TV, books and pulp magazines there are a number of stereotypes that PIs face.  There’s a lot more to the PI field than cheating spouses and traffic accidents.  “We of course do the divorce cases,” says Lindsey.  “That’s the staple of the private investigations industry, but if you get a qualified investigator there are a lot of investigative services that we offer from domestic cases to corporate cases.”

PCI does everything from prospective employee background checks, integrity checks to even seeing if outside sales people are indeed out selling.  In the private sector background checks come in handy, especially when someone is looking to hire a nanny.  If someone is going to come into your home to watch your children you might like to know that person is safe.  Also find out about the individual your son or daughter is dating and find out about their family.

Lindsey also works a lot of fraud cases, as well as missing persons.  He also does due diligence investigations.  “That’s when if you have a person your going into business with or thinking about investing money with and you might want to know about that person or what their background is to see if they can do what the say they can do and things like that,” he says.

With modern technology the life of a PI has become more sophisticated.  Thanks to the worldwide web and social networking not as much time on the streets is required to obtain information.  It’s a case-by-case situation.  Some PIs will stay glued to their computer while others you actually have to go out and beat the proverbial streets.  “You have to have a really neat balance between the two,” says Lindsey.

Still, there’s more to PCI than just investigations.  There’s personal security.  “We do executive protection,” says Lindsey.  “That would be for an individual that is either traveling either nationwide or locally and he wants some one to accompany him in a sense.”  PCI can also provide protection for the family while he or she is gone.

Lindsey has learned a lot since venturing out on his own as a private investigator.  “The biggest thing I think I’ve learned while being out here is the importance and value associated with networking – getting out and meeting people,” he says.  In order to do his job he has to be out there talking to people.  “By our networking, it gives us a lot more people to ask questions of and they can lead us down different paths or what not.”

His work has taken Lindsey abroad a time or two.  One case involved him getting hired by a law firm in Utah to fly to Marbella, Spain a few years back.  A group of attorneys invested over $400 million with an individual.  After two months all communication between the attorneys and individual had broken off.  They were worried about the money they had sent to be invested in the market over there.  Lindsey was contacted along with another PI firm out of Las Vegas and they got together and traveled to Marbella.  “Our directive was to find out where the guy lives, if he is who he says he is, and if he can do what he say he can do,” he says.   It turned out the only issue was the money from the attorneys wasn’t big enough to put in the market and produce the kind of results they wanted.  So the individual had two other investments come through – one for $600 million and one for $500 million.  He was going to put them all inand they were going to get an astronomical amount of return.  “But he didn’t feel the need to share that because he’s the broke and he’s in charge.”

The issue was cleared up and a little miscommunication caused the attorneys to freak out because of so much money at stake.  But all was resolved.  “In the end, he took us out to  dinner, met with the police chief and everything else,” says Lindsey.  “Then we spent a week in the Mediterranean.  So that was one of the better cases I worked.”

There’s not one segment of society in Chattanooga that can’t benefit from the services Lindsey and PCI offer, be it individual or corporate.  “What I bring to the table for the individual is the ability to ask in-depth questions that will help us develop a plan to resolve your issue,” he says.  “Just pour your heart out and let me know what issues you’re faced with and we’ll come up with a solution.”

 - Dave Weinthal

For more information about PCI call (423) 400-9609 or go to pcinvestigations.org

Some may call it the luck of the Irish, others will say timing, but regardless Sidney Hale has other thoughts as his Scotch-Irish pub, McHale’s Brewhouse prepares to celebrate its first anniversary as this month comes to a close.  “Well, it’s all about the beer,” he says.

“Consistency, consistency, consistency,” Hale says is why his little tavern located in Hixson has been able to flourish in these tough economic times.  Small breweries have trouble with and it is something he and his cousin Adam have put top priority.

“It’s really part science and part art form,” says Hale.  “And a lot of people can’t bring the two together.” 

While most microbreweries and taverns choose to be near downtown or the shopping mall, Hale chose a more bedroom community to open his brewhouse in the Hixson area.  Located on in the center of Ashland Terrace between Rivermont/Hixson and Red Bank,, McHale’s Brewhouse has been able to carve a niche for themselves.  “We picked this area, we thought it would be a good spot to try something here in the Hixson area.  We have the neighborhood bar,” he says.

As word got out about McHale’s and their craft beer, not only have they been getting people from the neighborhood, also people who traditionally go downtown have found their way to the pub.  People have driven from as far away as Atlanta to enjoy McHale’s brew.

Things haven’t been easy for McHale’s since opening.  They had to deal with a location that had a bad reputation from previous tenants and the building had been vacant for months before he decided to invest the time and money into opening.  “We don’t have any problems here,” says Hale.  “It’s just a laid back little community bar.”

Hale compares it to a bar like Cheers, where everybody knows your name.  “People come in, they know who you are,” he says.  “You come in, you’re going to have the same thing every time.”

Besides location Hale has had to deal with acts of God as well.  The tornadoes in the area hit the establishment pretty hard causing loss of inventory and down time caused by multiple power interruptions.  Hale recently brought in new management with a culinary background to help beef up the menu now that they have gotten all the issues with storm damage behind them.   “The kitchen is going to come off the hook in the next few months,” he says.

With everything looking up for McHale’s, they are looking forward to this Saturday, December 10th as they host the after-party for Chattanooga Homebrew Club, the Barley Mob’s “Fugetaboutit” homebrewer competition.  This year’s event will have 340 entries with the competition being held at CreateHere.  The after-party will have a lot to offer everyone as live performances by Irish  band, the Molly Maguires and Merrybellies dancers.  There will be a lot of giveaways that night as well with the festivities beginning at 8pm.

As McHale’s finishes up their first year in business, they have big plans as they start year number two.  They plan on hosting more brewing competitions and are going to push their new menu.  Also expect to see McHale’s beer around town offered by more locations.  “I have several other bars that want to start carrying our beer and we’re kicking up production into overdrive,” says Hale.    “We’re going to start seeing McHale’s beer around town at other locations.”

Currently McHale’s offers anywhere between five and eight different beers on tap.  Many are seasonal and others are available depending on demand.  “You can’t rush perfection,” says Hale.  “If we run out of something, we’re going to do it right before we put it back on tap.”

Hale has learned a lot being in business for himself this first year.  “Surround yourself with people that you love and people that you can trust,” he says.

“I’ve also learned a lot about people I didn’t know,” says Hale. This was his first experience hanging out in a bar environment.  The beer he says is what drew him to this place.  “The beer is good, man.  I decided to sink everything I had into this place for it,” he says. 

This first year Hale has learned a lot.  “Probably number one is most people are alright,” he says.  “For the most part most everybody just wants to be happy.  Everyone wants to come out and have a good time, blow off some of their troubles and enjoy friends.”

One of his proudest moments this first year in business was winning Best Pale Ale at the Chattanooga Market.  “Winning that prize was the highlight of the year,” says Hale.

“It’s been a long road,” Hale says about his first year in business.  “We made it to our first year and we’re doing pretty good. “I think we’re doing alright.”

 - Dave Weinthal

“I feel blessed to be here five years later,” says Dustin Choate.  Dustin is owner of the popular neighborhood pub Tremont Tavern located around the corner from Tremont Street and Hixson Pike in Riverview/North Chattanooga.

Unless you know Dustin, you wouldn’t know he was the owner.  Unassuming traveling back and forth across the floor of his tavern working, it would be easy to dismiss him as just another employee of the place. 

Humble to a fault, he admits running Tremont Tavern has been a rocky road for the former pharmaceutical rep turned pub owner.  “We had some trying times during the five years starting out not knowing what to do or how to do this,” he admits.  But five years later he can sit back as his little slice of heaven has become a favorite stopping point for those in the neighborhood and those with a sense of adventure to try something different.

“I just feel blessed to be here and the employees I’ve had here along the way made this a great place to come to and the people in the neighborhood and Chattanooga that supported Tremont, I feel grateful of all those folks who made this a successful place,” Choate says.

During college and grad school Choate found himself working in different bars and taverns.   Following a month of travel in Europe he returned stateside and took his experiences of work and visiting various taverns in Europe to conceptualize what he really wanted to do.  He moved to Chattanooga a few years back from Winston-Salem because of his pharmaceutical job and fell in love with the neighborhood.

While traveling back and forth to work he constantly passed the location that has been numerous concoctions over the years from bars to pizza to Greek cuisine.  The location stayed vacant for about a year and a half, when he decided to take a chance and open a place similar to where he worked in school and visited in his travels abroad.

“There was a lot of apprehension because this place had been multiple different things in the past,” Choate recalls.  Not familiar with the neighborhood he didn’t know if it would work out.  Some people told him he was crazy to try something there.  “I just couldn’t get over the fact that my personal feeling was that every great neighborhood needs a great neighborhood hangout.”

Having saved his money wisely, he was able to take a second mortgage on his house, secure a small business loan and opened Tremont Tavern in 2006. 

“When I opened here I opened with a focus on three things that would distinguish it,” says Choate.  The first was having a neighborhood place where people could literally walk to and walk home after enjoying a wide variety of beer.  No other place offered to selection Tremont offers except a few corporate restaurants around town.  “But it’s corporate ad very expensive,” he says.  “If you go there you’re going to spend a lot of money.”  He said he wanted to offer a better price alternative to the corporate chains.

Choate also focused on the menu as well  “The other thing I really wanted to do is good food,” he says.  The goal was to offer high quality food at a good price.  “We don’t do anything real fancy here,” he says.  The menu is filled with a diverse selection of gourmet burgers, specialty sandwiches and salads.  “We take pride in or food menu and our whole body of work food-wise.”

The final area Choate worked on was providing live entertainment.  A big music fan who travels to music festivals when time permits, he has been a lifelong fan of music.  “I’ve been a music fan since I was little,” he says. 

The first theme night he planned was open mic night that takes place every Tuesday at the Tavern.  Tremont Tavern has been a springboard for local musicians who have since graduated to touring regionally and even Europe.  He wanted a place where local musicians and their music would feel at home.    “I wanted to provide a place for local musicians to come and play out,” he says.

“I think all those tings together – having a great collection of beer at a great price, great food, supporting local music, neighborhood hangout – those are all important,” Choate says.

Like any business Tremont Tavern had bumpy times, but Choate can remember when the pub turned the corner and he knew it was established.  It was around Christmas of ’09 as he recalls.  “Probably sometime around 2009 I realized there was no turning back at that point and time,” he recalls.  “Barring natural disaster we were here to stay.”

The neighborhood has come to love Tremont Tavern as the pub is crawling with patrons all through the week.  They stop by to grab a burger, throw down a beer, unwind from work and come by at night to enjoy local music.  “I’m so grateful they love having a place to come down,” says Choate.

Since opening Tremont Tavern five years ago Choate has learned a lot. The most important lesson is not to overextend himself.  As business started to grow he had people constantly coming up to him with ideas for other business ventures.  “You find yourself in a place where you overextend yourself, where you probably would have been better to batten down the hatches and make sure what you’re doing right here today is firmly secured before you look at doing other adventures or projects.”

People constantly tell Choate they are envious of him and wish they could do what he was done, and pursue his dream.  “The most rewarding for me is being able to come here every day,” he says.  He also enjoys the entertainment aspect of owning Tremont Tavern, having a place where folks can blow off a little steam, relax and forget about their troubles for a moment.  “To have a place where people can do that and be entertained and do all those things is probably the most rewarding part of this.”

 - Dave Weinthal

Jeremy Roddy is one intimidating looking dude.  Tall and lanky he naturally looks down on people.  But to know him you might be surprised at the rage inside, but then again take a look at him.

Quiet and soft spoken, Roddy has been making a name for himself as a professional mixed marital artist, or a fighter in layman’s terms.  And he’s pretty good at it.  He doesn’t brag about it, in fact he’s almost too humble about his accomplishments.  He is an up and coming star in the world of MMA boasting an impressive 29-0 record.

Even more impressive than the record or even his calm demeanor out of the ring is the fact of the 29 fights only one has gone past the first round, as Roddy’s victims where knocked out quickly.  The one fight that lasted longer only made it into the second round before his victim was put in a submission hold. 

Roddy knew at an early age that fighting of some sort was in his future.  “I was a mean little kid,” he laughs.  He found himself at an early age not a bully, but a protector.  He was the guy at school that would beat up the bully for picking on someone.

Roddy’s odyssey became early as he started out boxing and wrestled in junior high.  One of his buddies knew jujitsu and taught him the ropes.  His training took him to Thailand to learn martial arts, where he lived for six months. 

Roddy learned a lot while over there.  “I learned people in Thailand live a lot tougher life that we do,” he recalls.  Training in Thailand was an every day thing.  “That’s their life.”

Unlike the guys that run around town with their “Affliction” t-shirts and MMA garb, Jeremy Roddy is a low-key kind of guy.  He classifies himself as such.  “I just consider myself a normal person that chose mixed martial arts.”

Roddy’s fighting strategy is rather unassuming as well.  Not boastful, cocky or arrogant he’s never one to assume anything of his opponent. “I look at everyone as if they are an equal,” he says.  “I think everybody can whoop me until he fights.”  And no one has as of yet.  He’s been training and cutting weight for an upcoming match in the upcoming weeks.

What kind of satisfaction does he get out of MMA?  “Paycheck,” Roddy says nonchalantly.  After a few more fights under his belt he will jump into championship contention and a big financial payoff.  They payoff now is pretty descent for a preliminary bout, but once him name moves higher and higher on the card, that’s when the real financial windfall kicks in.  Good competition is another satisfying aspect of MMA for the undefeated grappler.

A lot goes into preparing for a match for Roddy.  While others train for the individual person they are fighting, he takes a different approach.    “I train for every day scenario, so when I’m fighting some one I can tell their weakness by the way they hold their hands, the way they move their feet, the way they hold their head,” he says. 

The average MMA fighter will step into the ring between four and  six times a year depending on how healthy they remain.  Broken hands, ribs and other assorted ailments are commonplace for a mixed martial arts fighter.  A belt holder on the other hand will fight maybe once a year.

Roddy says he enjoys mixed marital arts as a sport.  “I think it’s the most athletic sport on the planet right now,” he says.  “You have to be a top-notch athlete.

When all is said and done, MMA has allowed Roddy to make a good living.  “I’ve made a lot of money and I’ve gotten to help a lot of people and I got to meet a lot of interesting people,” he says.  “I’ve gotten to go places that I never thought I’d get to go and see and do things like that.  It’s been pretty cool.”

That’s what he’s gotten out of his 12-year career as well as gratification.  “Nobody wants to lose.  Nobody ‘s going in there to lose,” he says.  “Somebody has to lose, just hopefully not me.”

 - Dave Weinthal

“Time to make the donuts” is a happy time at Julie Darling Donuts on Frazier Avenue.  Unlike to old TV commercial the art of the donut not only brings a smile to patrons of all ages but to the owners and staff of the confectionary.

“Who doesn’t love a donut?” says owner Kent Davis.  It’s a comfort food for a whole lot of people.”

Donuts have been a part of American culture since hitting the shore in the early 1800s.  They are the apple of Homer Simpson’s eye to the punch line of many a police joke for as long as can be remembered.  But most of all it brings many back to a simpler and/or happier time of their childhood.

The history of donuts has a disputed history.  It is generally believed Dutch settlers brought the donut over here in early 1800s.  They were called olykoeks, a Dutch word meaning “oil cakes”.

How the hole came into existence is also up for debate.  Stories have the hole coming out if necessity while a ship’s captain was steering his vessel through stormy weather, spearing his cake in the spokes of the wheel to free up both hands to a confectioner trying to save on food costs by cutting out the center of the fried cake.

Donuts have evolved over the years from the days of the simple glazed or jelly filled concoctions.  “We’re constantly trying to come up with something different – something unique,” says Davis.  Julie Darling Donuts keep a good selection of gourmet donuts and specialty flavors.  “We’re always trying to think of something different.”

The donut café has tried many different flavors since opening their doors – everything from a margarita donut to a pancake and bacon donut that features a maple icing topped with bacon bits.

Much like other foods donuts at Julie Darling Donuts tend to be seasonal as well.  “There are different flavors that people want in the summer than they want in the fall and winter,” says Steve Smith, general manager.  July was tropical donut month at the shop that included flavors like tangerine and pina colada.

“There are certain donuts that won’t sell,” says Davis.  “We have an orange creamsicle in the summertime.  It starts cooling down, you can’t give them away.”

Stepping into the shop is like stepping into nirvana.  The wafting aroma of freshly prepared donuts and coffee fill the air, automatically making one feel at home.  The layout of the place is simple with an open floor plan that allows the customer to see what is gong on. 

“We wanted people to see that they are made fresh here,” says Davis.  “You can watch them being made and we also wanted people to see a nice, clean environment.”

On any give day you will find 15-18 varieties of donut available.  “We have 18 different fillings that we use,” says Smith.  He and Davis say one of their most popular is the pancakes and bacon donut.  The blueberry is another favorite amongst patrons.  Personal favorites amongst the staff include the seasonal pumpkin spice with cream cheese icing, coconut creme pie and key lime pie.  According to a recent study over one billion donuts are made every year.

There is more to Julie Darling Donuts than donuts.  The shop offers locally roasted coffees as well as sandwiches served on their own sandwich bread and salads as well.  Davis says he wanted people to have the ability to make it a lunch destination.  They also serve ice cream and offer their soon to be famous donut sundae.

The shop also does a lot of work with local charities.  “We work pretty extensively with the Chattanooga Community Kitchen because we’re all about fresh,” says Davis.  Donuts and bread not sold in the day they are made automatically go to the Community Kitchen to help feed the homeless.  Julie Darling Donuts also had a fundraiser in August for the charity.  “I can’t even begin to name all the charities we donated donuts to,” says Davis.  The most recent event was for McKamey Animal Center.

Located at 121 Frazier Avenue and open Monday through Saturday at 7am, there is no telling who you might see in there.  Everyone from mom and dad sharing quality time with their children to a business person grabbing a quick snack to a college student studying hard near the fireplace taking advantage of the free wi-fi offered by Julie Darling Donuts.

“I think one of the most fun things for me is giving a fun venue for people to come be and hang out and just relax,” says Davis.  “I love the mornings here see the dads who are taking their kids to school or daycare, or whatever and stop in and get a donut and see the excitement on a kid’s face.”

Davis and Smith agree being on the Northshore has been rewarding.  “I think we fit in because we’re local,” says Davis.  Julie Darling Donuts have fit well with the other locally owned businesses that flank them.  People from all around have patronized the shop whether it be on foot or a visitor looking for something that is locally derivative and not a national chain franchise – something that is definitely Chattanooga.

Creating the one-of-a-kind donut experience in a neighborhood environment brings back childhood memories for many to a simpler, and some agree happier time.  There are many rewards to doing what they do at Julie Darling Donuts.  “Watching people leave with a smile on their face,” says Smith.

“We want to be Chattanooga’s donut,” says Davis.  “We just want to offer Chattanooga a great product.”

 - Dave Weinthal

To find out more about what Julie Darling Donuts has to offer go to jddonuts.com.

Ten years.  That’s a long time. 3,652 days, 87,648 minutes and so on.  Most marriages today are lucky to last half that long, but Shawn Whitfield and Casey Orr hsve something special with their radio show, Valvoline Racing Radio.  From humble beginnings in 2001, the show has grown and spawned a TV series as well.  Shawn Whitfield too a little time out of his busy schedule to reminisce about the past ten years.

Where did your interest in NASCAR come from?

It all started with business in mind. My family and I have a company called Whitfield Oil Company. We're in the fuels and lubricant distribution business. We also represent several different oil companies. My father started the company with Union 76, back in the 1960's. Union 76 was the "official fuel of NASCAR" for more than 50 years. Back in the early 1990's my company began to provide fuel to various NASCAR events in the southeast on behalf of Union 76. I began to be a part of NASCAR from the business side of the spectrum. I continued to be apart of that motorsports program with Union 76, all the way up to their departure of the sport at the end of 2003. Sales and marketing have always been my love of the business world and that's what NASCAR is. I always say NASCAR is a business first and a sport second. It's where business markets there products.

How did the show come about?

Clay Hunnicutt, Sammy George with ClearChannel Radio, and me came up with the idea of forming a NASCAR radio talk show at the end of 2000. They gave me the opportunity to name the program, and make it my own show. In February 2001, Valvoline Racing Radio hit the airwaves of Chattanooga radio. I really didn't think it would go beyond one year. I'd never done radio before. I primarily decided to do the show for fun, and an opportunity to market the Valvoline brand. Whitfield Oil Company is the Valvoline distributor for all of East Tennessee and North Georgia.

How did you and Casey Orr come together?

Casey was the Promotions Director with ClearChannel Radio in 2005. At that time, we were doing each show at a place called Wheel's Sports Bar. Casey would setup our equipment each show. Kris Van Dyke and Jim Beam were my co-host. In June 2005, Jim Beam left ClearChannel Radio. That gave us the opportunity to bring Casey on to the show. He's been with me ever since.

How much time do you put into preparing for each show?

There's a lot that goes into each show, however I've got the help of my producer Big Daddy Kyle. By 2007 I decided to form a media company called V.R.R. Productions. At that point the show turned into a business. In the first seven years, Valvoline Racing Radio was only on the air one time per week. By 2009 and to present, Valvoline Racing Radio is on the radio three times per week.

I follow NASCAR on a daily basis. You have too, in order to keep up. The sport changes everyday. After doing the program for 10 years now, it's gotten easier to prepare for and with the internet it makes show preparation easier as well.

How rewarding is doing Valvoline Racing Radio?

After ending my 10th season, there have been so many rewards. I owe a lot of thanks to so many people. The show wouldn't exist, if it wasn't for Sammy George and Clay Hunnicutt with ClearChannel Radio Chattanooga. Those guys gave me the opportunity to make Valvoline Racing Radio what it is today. I always say I'm just like NASCAR, that you're only as good as your team. I've had the pleasure of working with some great co-host throughout the years. When Casey Orr became apart of the program, it took the show to the next level. Casey has been a huge asset to the success of Valvoline Racing Radio.

Valvoline Racing Radio has given me the opportunity to market the Valvoline brand, which has added to the business success we've had with Whitfield Oil Company. I've made so many friends thru the years thru radio. I've also have and had so many great sponsors thru the years. My show is just like NASCAR, you can't do it without sponsors. My sponsors are great business partners. I think one of the biggest rewards is when

I talk to listeners that tell me how long or how much they enjoy listening. Valvoline Racing Radio also opened up the opportunity to do a NASCAR television show, which began at FOX 61 for three years. At the beginning of 2010, I moved the television show to WRCB-TV Channel 3, where the show airs today.

What are a few of your favorite memories from the past ten years?

There are so many. I guess the one that stick out in my mind the most is when I came back to ClearChannel Radio Chattanooga and the show hit #1 in the Arbitron ratings with Men 25-54, for our time slot on ROCK 105. We hit that mark in 2009, and the show has continued to be at the top ever since. I would say next is when we started Valvoline Racing Tonight at FOX 61, and later formed Valvoline Racing Rev'd Up at WRCB-TV Channel 3. My five years of television have been fun and a learning experience.

What keeps Valvoline Racing Radio going?

My team and sponsors! I owe a lot to Casey Orr and Producer - Big Daddy Kyle. It's a team effort. Plus, I'm lucky to be on a radio station like ROCK 105. ClearChannel Radio has been great to me thru the years. The current ClearChannel Radio Chattanooga management team, Jared Stehney, Gator Harrison, and Brian Delaney, are truly a pleasure to work with.

I still have fun and look forward to every show. I'm lucky and blessed to have a part time job that's a pleasure to do. We've got listeners that listen to us every Monday and Thursday's on there way home. We keep them up to date with NASCAR. I have people tell me often, that they don't have four hours to spend on Sunday afternoon to spend in front of the television. People are busy, they have families, and always on the move. Our listening audience is often what I call "casual NASCAR fans". They want to keep up with the sport, but are busy people. That's where Valvoline Racing Radio comes in. We keep the people of North Georgia and East Tennessee up to date with what's going on in the world of NASCAR.

 - Dave Weinthal

For more info on Valvoline Racing Radio go to www.valvolineracingradio.com

“We’re not here to sell them something, we’re here to improve their lives and improve their relationships,” says Kathy Henry, owner of Xcite! Lingerie & Clubwear.

On the eve of her eleventh anniversary, Henry says her store helps couples connect, bringing sexy back to marriage.  Located at 5036 Highway 58 she has done more than sell lingerie and clubwear.  “I’ve met a lot of people from 2001 that are still my friends and customers today,” she says.

Entering the store is unlike other similar shops.  It’s not a high-pressure sales experience.  The store is quiet, staffed entirely by females, clean and well stocked.  “We’ve helped people come to grip with their sexuality,” Henry says.

Business and the number of vendors that cater to Xcite! has grown over time.  “When I first had the store we were dealing mostly with Shirley of Hollywood, Dreamgirl and Leg Avenue,” says Henry.  Today she touts the ware of some of her newest lines like Living Dead Souls.  “We have had a great response to their line and we’re carrying them for dresses, corsets, and skirts,” she says.  “We carry a lot of their product.”

The clientele at Xcite! is wide and varied.  On any given day there are people from all walks of life such as housewives, business professionals, college students and more.  “We have many ladies that come in that want to dress nice for their husbands,” says Henry.  “We garner all different types of people, not just goth and fetish.”  Everyone from high-end clientele, club-goers to those looking for something special for a bachelorette party find themselves at Xcite!.  “We cover it all.”

Because of the welcoming demeanor at Xcite!, many have been able to come to grips with their sexuality Henry says. Whether they are a male who prefers to dress as a female or vice versa the store is very accommodating.  “They are going to be appreciated for who they are,” she says.

Henry and her staff are very attentive to their clients’ needs.  Once entering the relaxed atmosphere the client is consulted as to what they’re looking for.  “If they’re buying for a bachelorette party we’ll lead them into that direction,” she says.  “If they’re buying for a trip to Gatlinburg we will lead them in that direction – get them everything they need from lingerie to stockings to massage oils.”

Much like traditional clothing, there are seasons as well when it comes to lingerie and finery.  “Right now we’re in our busy season,” says Henry.  Business really picks up for stores like Xcite! once school begins.  Currently half the store is Halloween.  The rush usually lasts through the holidays Halloween, Christmas and ending with Valentines Day.  “We don’t let off until after Valentines Day,” she says.

Trends Henry sees is that lingerie is the new clubwear.  “In the club it’s sort of like less is more,” she says.

Henry has been able to take her knack for buying beautiful stuff to open Xcite! in 2001 with the encouragement of her husband.  Since opening she has expanded her business to include everything from lingerie, clubwear, jewelry, shoes, wigs, bridal/bachelorette, massage oils and leather.  She has close to two dozen lines available such as Living Dead Souls, Baci, Be Wicked, Leg Avenue and more and a half dozen shoe lines such as Ellie, Wild Diva, Reflections, Highest Heel, Penthouse and Playboy.

“Remember, sexy is a state of mind,” says Henry.

 - Dave Weinthal

Since the dawn of man people has looked for different ways to socialize, meet others and seek an escape from everyday life.  Thursday XS of Chattanooga will open its doors to Chattanooga with the goal in mind to bring people a choice different from what they are used to.

Located at 405 Market Street the owners of the 4,000 square foot space have spent the better part of a year surveying the city, its culture and what it may be missing as far as nightlife going.

There are plenty of places to drink in Chattanooga these days, a far cry from 30 years ago when an establishment couldn’t have any reference to alcohol in their name according to the city ordinance.  That is why the chain Steak & Ale was originally called the Jolly Ox until the ordinance was changed in the early ‘80s.  These days a new bar or tavern opens almost on a monthly basis, some with pervious experience, some with none, and many who learn the hard way.

XS owners Michael Sandborn and Michael Cutchens came to town and talked with people in the community to see what they were looking for as far as nightlife and entertainment was concerned.

“They wanted a clean, safe place to go and party and have a good time,” says Cutchens.  They wanted a nice enjoyable nightclub.   “And they’re just gonna be blown away when they come here,” he says.  “They’re gonna love it.”

The pair wasted no expense in bringing to life their vision of a premier nightclub to Chattanooga.  The two invested close to a quarter of a million dollars in lights and sound for the club.  With a tally of well over a half a million dollars they made improvements to the building’s safety, totally rebuilding bathrooms, the kitchen and making sure every inch of the building was up to code.  “Our objective is over the long term,” says Sandborn.  Not looking to make a quick dollar and run, he and Cutchens plan to be here for quite sometime and hope to add to the community as it continues to grow with the influx of business from the likes of VW and Wacker, just to name a few.

Sandborn says he plans to put money right back into the business in order to get it to absolute peak performance.  “And keep it that way,” he says.

“We looked at club after club after club and what you see right now is really a fraction of where we want to go,” says Sandborn.  “It’s just the beginning.”

XS, besides being a nightclub will add to the community in other ways most people don’t think about.  When the club opens Thursday it will have hired 20 people.  Add to that the tax revenue cow that serving alcohol is in the state of Tennessee.  Every gallon of alcohol served in Tennessee is taxed $4.04.  That breaks down to a nickel for every single shot served going to the state.  Add to that sales tax, employee tax, insurance, and the city and state make a fortune off of the nightclub, bar and tavern business.  While there are still a number of Bible thumpers out there still, one cannot look past the potential revenue XS and places like it generate for the local economy.

XS’s core crowd will be the 35 and under demographic. “Anybody’s welcome,” says Sandborn.  The club owner says he is focusing the music on what they crowd wants to hear.  “The deejays that come in are going to be listening to the crowd,” he says.

Sandborn and Cutchens have big plans for XS.  While guarded in discussing their long range plans one gets the feeling this will be a blueprint for opening other nightclubs.  “We plan to be here a long time,” says Cutchens.  “We plan on running this place like it should be and we plan on staying here,” he adds.

Both partners really like what is Chattanooga.  “We love it,” Cutchens says.  “It’s an awesome city.”

 - Dave Weinthal

“It’s about the art,” says Michael Sandborn president of XS of Chattanooga.  XS Nightclub is downtown’s latest foray into downtown entertainment beginning October 13.

Sandborn, along with partner Michael Cutchens have taken the long vacant former barber school location at 4th and Market and are planning to bring a big city feel to Chattanooga nightlife.  “The experience you get here, we want it to be unrivaled,” he says.

A lot of time and money has been put into remodeling, bringing the building up to code and making it an aural and visual experience for those tired of the same old routine and ultra casual atmosphere most nightspots in Chattanooga offer.

“We don’t want you showing up like you’re going to a bar to hang out and drink,” Sandborn says. “We want you to dress up.  It’s art.”

Part of that concept to Sandborn is it will give people an opportunity to be a part of the reflective of the club, not just furnishings.  “The crowd itself becomes part of the mix,” he says.

Sandborn has spent time in other markets such as Atlanta while coming up with the concept of XS.  “When I go to Atlanta I love seeing the people that come there,” he says.  “They show they have a sense of who they are, how they want to be represented and be part of the art environment.

What Sandborn and Cutchens want to do with XS is bring the best of the big city club environment to Chattanooga.  The pair has spared no expense on anything from state of the art lights and sound to flooring and fixtures in the restrooms.  “When you walk in here we want the lights to just dazzle you,” Sandborn says.  “Hypnotize you, get you in the mood.”  Add to that a deep field of sound, compliment it with an array of the best touring deejays in the country then you have XS.  “The experience that you get here, we want it to be unrivaled,” he says.  “You need to go to a major city in the hot premier clubs in those cities to get what you’re going to get here.”

Both partners have spent time in Chattanooga various times in their lives and were familiar with the city and what was available in terms of nightlife.  “We spent a long time looking at where the city is headed and we think that this is the place to be for a long time to come, and it’s only going to get better,” says Sandborn.  “And we want to be part of that.  We want to be a part of pushing that agenda forward, providing something that isn’t done right now.”

Upon entering XS one will notice the detail of the art.  “We want the person that comes in here to go away feeling they’ve experienced something professional,” says Sandborn.  “That’s what’s going to make them come back.”  If XS is about anything the two believe it is making sure people are having a good time every night the club is in operation.  The two plan never to have a let up as they plan to keep bringing in new concepts and even décor.  “We’re always staying on the edge of whatever is the newest thing in nightclub technology,” he adds.  We want to keep the excitement going. 

XS is just the beginning Sandborn says.  “There are many things that can be done and we would love to be able to throw it all out the first time,” he says.  “We also like the progressive evolution of the design.  It would give us an opportunity to go step by step to see how things work and from our standpoint, more and more about the art.”

The two partners are focused on making XS the ultimate experience for their clientele without any let up.  They want to maximize the experience.  “It never stops being in out thought process,” says Sandborn.  “That’s the concept of XS.

Sandborn and Cutchens have their vision to what a premier nightclub should be and to them it is about the artistry.  “We simply want to focus on doing the best we can possibly do,” says Sandborn.  The pair’s objective is to reinvest revenue back into the business to keep it operating at peak performance.    “We have a different vision and we believe that vision is going to be what people are looking for.”

“Over the top,” says Cutchens.  “And I believe we.  That’s why it’s called XS.”

 - Dave Weinthal

“Everything He Touches Turns to Gold”

The golden voice of Eli Gold is recognized as a sports icon. Whether it be NASCAR, hockey or Alabama football, you can not deny the voice that commands attention. Gold’s knowledge on sports makes it a treat to discuss predictions, facts and frankly anything about most any sport. Although not a sportsman himself, he has been enthralled in sports since he was a young adult. Born 1953 in Manhattan, NY he always knew he wanted to be involved in sports, but knew it would not be as a participant. As a young adult he became interested in broadcasting, going from one radio station to the other learning from the best. After training in the industry, he made a pest of himself until somebody hired him in the minor hockey league in NY. “At the end of the season, they gave me a $50 Sears gift certificate for my seasons pay. After a couple of years I was hired to be the color commentator and after a few games the play-by-play guy quit and they gave me the chance and that is how it all began.”

While still in New York Gold was hired into NASCAR and continued to call hockey. It was shortly after starting in NASCAR he was offered a job in Birmingham for their hockey league. Gary Sanders was the commentator at the time and also did sports for Channel 13 in Birmingham and couldn’t do both any longer. He was given the full time position. In 1987 the Bama job opened up and I applied, although I knew I was not qualified they still hired me and this is where I have remained since.

Eli on NASCAR:

Mr. Gold, what do you think about Danica Patrick coming to NASCAR?

She is most certainly great for the sport”. “She is a talent and a wonderful marketing machine. Both of which are very important factors. Now this is not a gender specific statement at all, but she needs to find out if she can endure racing week after week after week. She will be racing more than double what she was”. “Take a look at Juan Pable Montoya for instance, it took Juan three and a half years to make himself a serious contender week after week. So this is not by any means a gender specific statement. No question she is not afraid, she is used to going much faster for sure”

Do you think Stewart Hoss will have her in the Sprint Cup?

Yes, that was pretty much announced and she is to start the Daytona 500 this year.

Do you think J & R Motorsports will have her running in the Indy 500?

Yes, she is an excellent over track racer and has less experience on road races, however the Indy 500 is different. Of course she will be riding in that, although I doubt any other of the open wheeled races.

 Who you think Clint Boyer will sign with or do you think he will stay with Richard Childress Racing?

I have no idea, but I tend to think he should stay with who he is with. But they have their issues, will he have a sponsor next year? I don’t blame him for looking elsewhere, but any move he makes would be just a lateral move. He is currently with the best team out there and I feel he should just stay put.

Do you think Rousch will keep David Reagan in the UPS car?

That’s strictly a dollar and cents decision. He is a very good driver and already has 1 win this year. David is a very nice guy, and a good young driver. It depends on if UPS wants to remain on the same level.

Eli on SEC/Alabama Football:

Mr. Gold, what do you think about the AP pre-season rankings?

It’s just a ranking. Who knows. Here we are on Aug. 26th and we have at least 15 teams in the nation thinking they are #1 in the nation. It does not matter pre-season. It is what it is. I don’t know what the rankings should be honestly

What do you think about the Oregon v LSU game?

Again, we just don’t know. Oregon is a very strong team and we don’t know if Jefferson will be playing quarterback or not. Now this just may affect the outcome of the game.

Do you think the SEC is stronger this year than last?

The SEC is always stronger than others, especially pre-season. But we do have our drawbacks. With Tennessee losing their running back and Arkansas losing a player, Mississippi State the same, these are things we have to keep into consideration. But any of the SEC teams are always stronger than anyone else in the nation. And if you ask anyone and they are HONEST, they will tell you the SEC is always the strongest league in the nation. Consistently.

How come is it that the SEC always wins the bowls and National Championships yet consistently are always ranked low in the pre-season polls?

Take Auburn for instance, now ranked 23 in the polls. Auburn has lost about 27 of its team members to the NFL. The team that carried Auburn to the National Championship is no longer there. Auburn ranked 23, and they had unarguably the best quarterback of all time in Cam Newton.

Alabama ranked #2, do you think Saban can carry Alabama to yet another national championship?

Alabama will no doubt be a contender and under Nick Saban’s direction where all things are possible. Right now I think there is a very good chance this can happen.”

Chattanooga has always had a fertile fan base along with Middle Tennessee. We frequently speak at Alabama Alumni meetings in these areas. I don’t think people realize what a strong fan base Tennessee has with Alabama.

 - Ginger Belcher Bankston

“The Henry Cho Show” will air on GAC (Great American Country) on Sept 8th at 8pmEastern/7pmCentral-8pmPacific/7pmMtn. The show will have sketches, stand ups, videos, country artists and more. Henry pitched the idea to GAC execs as a modern day Carol Burnett and a clean SNL (Saturday Night Live). The need for clean comedy on television is great and the market is huge. By choosing to partner with GAC, Cho is able to work on the show and stay where he and his family want to live, Nashville, TN. With the help of his country star pals (Vince Gill, Phil Vasser, Rodney Atkins to name 3) he’s put together a unique show. The show features two stand up comedians along with Henry and other sketches and videos and a country artist or two. Henry’s friend and co-writer for his past CBS/Paramount pilot script, Jim Hope, is also involved as co-creator, co-writer, co-producer along with Cho. Henry has utilized his pals in the comedy world also to do sketches and make videos with him. The airing of the special/pilot brings to fruition the brand Cho has developed as a stand up comedian for 25+ years. The adult but clean comedy is something the entire family can enjoy. So sit back, grab the kids if you have them and enjoy the ride, gonna be a funny one.

As a comic you write your own material. On a TV show you either share of have others write for you depending on the situation. Are you comfortable having others write for or about you for a situation comedy?

About my GAC show and my sitcom deal with CBS is I’m also a writer/producer so I do have creative control. That’s why I never just audition for roles on shows. Without control I’m not interested. There’s too much fodder out there and I have something different to bring to the table.

How do you feel your standup can translate to the sitcom format?

My stand up show is a sitcom waiting to happen. That’s a quote from execs from ABC and CBS...unfortunately, they haven’t green-lighted it yet.

Is your character on your new show you or are you playing a character?

I always play me - just in a different situation… i.e employment.

As someone who has watched and even been in a few movies and TV shows, what makes for a good comedy in your opinion?

My brand is clean adult comedy. You can watch my shows as a family, your 8-year-old won’t get most of my jokes (I hope I’m more cerebral than an 8-year-old) but a parent doesn’t have to be afraid of content.

Craig Ferguson is the executive producer of your show. Did he give you some pointers and offer some advice in creating your pilot after himself having a long successful run as part of the ensemble cast of “The Drew Carey Show”?

Great thing about Craig is he’s a stand up comedian and he was on a sitcom so he knows exactly what I’m trying to do.

You are known and actually praised for your clean humor. Is it difficult to be a clean comic these days? It seems like in the past some comics would cuss or say stuff for shock value to get a laugh or reaction.

I think the wave of comedy is shifting and there is a huge market for clean comedy and I hope to hit that market with the “Henry Cho Sho” on GAC. It’s always harder to be clean, easier to make a joke dirty and get a laugh for the wrong reasons. When I worked with Seinfeld back when I first started, he told me not to work on a joke unless I could do it on TV… and he meant the “Tonight Show”, not HBO or Comedy Central.

Many things go into being a comic other than just getting in front of a microphone. What do you think is the most important aspect in what you are doing?

Lots of people are funny, some can even get in front of people and tell a joke or two. But only a true working stand up can write jokes - make something funny where others don’t see it. That and dealing with life on the road are the two big factors. It’s tough to travel solo and go to towns where you know no one and hang out for a week.

Your name is increasingly well known. When in public do you feel like you always have to be “on”? And is that any different than when you’re not in front of a mic or camera?

About half the comedians are on all the time. Others are like me - just a normal guy who happens to have a God-given talent to be funny. Unless it’s a working environment I don’t turn it ‘on’. That said, when I’m around my pals we’ll talk about things as everyone does and they’ll be really funny, but I can toss out a line that is way out of their realm...just a different talent.

You have a kind of milestone birthday coming up at the end of the year. I’m not sure if I should mention it, but what goes through your mind as it approaches?

Turning 50 end of December..... Great thing is I still play 35 on TV. As I say...I’m Korean....that’s like 28 whiteboy. I hope to live past 100.....with genetics on my side it is very possible...so the crazy thing about turning 50 is that I’m now at the top of the bell curve...it’s all downhill from now on. Cool thing is I get to take a killer golf trip to celebrate!

- Dave Weinthal

Henry Cho makes a special appearance this Friday and Saturday night at the Comedy Catch. For reservations and more info go to thecomedycatch.com.

Downtown Chattanooga’s nightlife and dining experience will take a decidedly step forward with the opening of Southern Comfort Friday.

Southern Comfort is a new facility that is part formal dining (or steakhouse) and part cabaret/nightclub. Owner Mark Chitwood looked to the past for inspiration.

“I remember growing up my parents telling me stories of how they went out for dinner and dancing,” Chitwood recalls. “I would hear stories of how the men and women would dress up, enjoy a well-prepared meal and afterwards hit the dance floor – all in the same building.”

That is something not seen any more these days. Today one must choose if they want to eat or party. If both, they must choose two different locations, sometimes miles apart to accomplish this. “Most places where there is either live music or a dance crowd, your dining options are limited to an array of fried foods and grilled burgers,” Chitwood says. The nicer restaurants he says tend to lack a distinct personality. He’s hoping with Southern Comfort to mix the two cultures and create an atmosphere to draw a more diverse crowd into downtown.

“The problem I have seen in other clubs in this town is they are trying to cater to the same two or three hundred people,” says Chitwood. There’s over 400,000 residents in Hamilton County alone, not counting neighboring counties,” he adds. With Southern Comfort it is his goal not to go after the same people, but attract other people who might have shied away from coming out either because of the way a lot of clubs present themselves, or from strictly hearsay. “I want to give others a reason to come out at night, while still welcoming the people who will no doubt make their rounds.”

Southern Comfort is located at 511 Broad Street located between Sugar’s and FSG Bank. Chitwood converted a 7,012-foot former finance building into a multi-level dual use facility. Upon entering the foyer one has the option to go into the semi-formal dining room complete with crystal chandeliers and linen, or entering the dance side of the venue. To the left of the main room is a VIP room with floor length one-way windows giving VIP guests a complete view of the club while retaining their privacy. The room comes complete with a private bar.

Chitwood spared no expense to make the experience upscale. Little things were added to make it different from other bars including hooks at the bars so the female patrons can hang their purses if desired. In the ladies room there is a full-length mirror and makeup tables as well. In the main room there is a multi-level dance floor that doubles as a stage for live entertainment.

Currently Chitwood plans only to have live music during the week on a Thursday night. He installed a state-of-the-art light and sound system for a deejay on the weekends. “We’ll be playing what’s current on the dance charts as well as taking requests from the guests,” he says. Other themed night are in the works include a ‘70s and ‘80s night.

“My goal is to update the old dinner club of the bygone era and marry it with today’s fast-paced ever changing digital age,” say Chitwood. “I think Chattanooga is ready for an establishment like this and I feel fortunate to be able to be the one to do it.”

- Wm. Alexander

Once upon a time there were only three television networks, most radio stations kept a full staff of reporters and announcers to rival the newspaper, and most of these radio stations were AM, and they ruled the airwaves like something you have never seen or heard.

Times change. Today, AM radio is pretty much a dinosaur, with the airwaves ruled by the FM frequency, internet and satellite. No longer do you need rabbit ears to tune in a TV station. We’re gone from three choices for television programming to over a thousand choices. If there is a particular interest, there is a good chance there is a cable, satellite or internet channel for that as well – everything from fly fishing to fish frying and everything in between and all around.

Familiar radio names and/or voices, once thought of as extended family have given way to the technology of voice-tracking and syndicated content. Locally produced programs which ran the gamut from children’s programming, variety, and news is now limited to newscasts and (gasp) infomercials to fill up non-network airtime.

Before corporate radio redefined the radio and TV landscape, these personalities were local celebrities. We knew who these folks were, and many of us went to school with some of them. Before the medium became somewhat cutthroat if wasn’t unheard of for a young man or woman to walk into a radio or TV station locally and get on the air (provided they had some aptitude toward the medium). It’s kind of like the old Hollywood story of being discovered while working at a drugstore or soda shop, except locally.

One of the last of that generation who can write about it and lived the dream is David Carroll of WRCB-TV 3. Carroll, who has been a part of local media since the early 1970s, it turns out was the perfect person to put together a definitive collection of pictures and stories that document the history of radio and television in Chattanooga in his book called, Chattanooga Radio and Television.

Carroll admits to a life-long love affair with radio and television. As a youth growing up in the Tennessee Valley he would take his allowance and buy a TV Guide. “I learned to read from TV Guide,” he recalls. “From the time I learned to read before I was in school, that’s when I was in love with TV.”

His earliest recollections of watching local television was seeing Mort Lloyd with his bald head, a globe over his shoulder and his deep voice. “Later on Miss Marcia taught me how to tell time, taught me how to tie my shoes.”

Things were a lot different as a teenager for Carroll compared to today’s teenagers. “When I was a teenager I could call up the nighttime, weekend deejay at one of the rock and roll stations in Chattanooga or South Pittsburg and they’d say, ‘Hey, come over and hang with us!’” he remembers. “I’d ride my motorcycle and sit and watch these guys play records and talk to girls on the phone and realize, wow, they get paid for this.”

The times have changed, however. “Now with so many stations on satellite, or voice-tracking or syndicated programming, I don’t know if a 15-year-old can do that,” he laments. “Certainly they don’t have as many options as I did. That’s probably the saddest part, just the continued consolidation of ownership that has resulted in a lot of cost-cutting measures and there aren’t as many opportunities for young people to get into radio and be personalities.”

Researching the book a few things really stood out to Carroll. The first thing that stood out was the actual history of how radio came into being. The stations originally, according to Carroll were launched in an attempt to sell more crystal radios which two schoolmates, Norman Thomas and Earl Winger did to make money. Prior to the launching of WDOD in 1925, folks in Chattanooga would do their best to try and tune in stations from Atlanta, Nashville, or wherever they could pick up a signal. “The first four years it was only on at night,” he says. “And then they started to gradually add more programming.”

“And one of the cool things I found out was that despite popular belief, Luther [Masingill] wasn’t the first guy on radio,” Carroll says with a smile. A good portion of the book is rightly dedicated to the legendary broadcaster who began his radio career while still in high school and still anchors mornings at WDEF today as well as appearing on Channel 12 from time to time.

But before Luther there were guys like Chuck Simpson, who became a star in the Scenic City, quite possibly the first media star in the market. When Simpson left for a job in Florida the daily paper’s headline announced his departure. When Simpson returned to Chattanooga a few months later the front page of the newspaper said “Welcome Back Chuck Simpson!”

Both Luther and Carroll have had opportunities to move to a different and/or bigger markets, but both decided to remain true to the Chattanooga area. With all the radio competition today, it is hard to fathom a day when there were only six radio stations, like back in the day when Luther began his career. At one point, he was garnering 67 percent of all radio listeners, while the other five stations fought over the remaining 33 precent. Job offers from all around came in – everywhere from Chicago, Milwaukee, and Philadelphia came calling for Luther. “So Luther got all these offers, but what he told me; you can’t beat the scenery, can’t beat the friendliness, can’t beat the cost of living,” Carroll says. “He just loved it here.” He goes on to say if one asks Cindy Sexton, Jed Mescon or himself, they would all say the same thing. “It’s a really great place to live and raise a family.”

A number of very famous celebrities got their start in Chattanooga media. One of the biggest being Jim Nabors (Gomer Pyle, Andy Griffith Show). Nabors was a film cutter at WRPG, the local NBC affiliate (now WRCB). From time to time he would be put on one of the locally produced variety shows because of his rich baritone singing voice.
Archie Campbell is another who got his start in Chattanooga media on radio. He is best remembered for being “Grandpappy” on Hee Haw, which was a character he created when he was in his early 20s and on the air at WDOD.

George Gobel moved from Chicago to make it in radio originally before going to TV. Many remember him best for his appearances of Hollywood Squares. In the 1930s he was known as Little Georgie Gobel.

Carroll’s book, Chattanooga Radio and Television also documents some legendary children’s programming that was locally produced. “That was a real staple at the time,” he says. The baby boomer generation was a totally different experience compared to today’s modern family. “Mom was at home, kids came home right after school. It wasn’t like life in 2011 when everybody was going to soccer practice and doing all the things we do today,” he says.

Arriving home from school a kid would turn on the TV and there would be a cowboy by the name of Bob Brandy with his wife Ingrid and their faithful horse Trigger. The show had a studio audience of kids and Brandy would show old westerns, cartoons, short comedy films and games for the kids in the audience to take part in. When it was snack time Brandy would let one of the kids drive pedal actually the snack wagon and help hand out snacks like Little Debbie snack cakes and Golden Flake potato chips.

Morning children would wake up to Romper Room or Miss Marcia, going over the basics of what now is Pre-K, learning to count, read and spell. TV once considered the “vast wasteland” used children’s shows to help convince parents that it could be an educational and good way to spend time. “And goodness knows it made legends of Marcia Kling, Bob Brandy and some of the others,” Carroll says.

Carroll learned a lot about Chattanooga media in while doing research. “One positive thing is despite all the competition and the sometimes in-fighting that goes on sometimes that goes on in all media, I had 100 percent cooperation in this book,” he says. “I’m really grateful for that.”

All three major networks and all the radio stations welcomed Carroll with open arms sharing archived pictures, and stories for the book. No one asked for preferred treatment either. “I think that despite all the competition there’s a genuine brotherhood among the broadcasters here – that we are singularly proud of our broadcast heritage here.”

In putting together Chattanooga Radio and Television Carroll says he learned a little about himself as well. “I think I learned something I already knew – I’m very much a fn as I am a participant,” he says. “I’ve been in media here for 30-something years and I’m proud to of made this my profession, but I really admire the people who do it well and people who are good communicators and people who just love this type of work,” he adds.

Tracy Knauss, publisher of Ultralight Flying Magazine helped restore some of the old photographs Carroll collected for the book. Knauss told him he was born to do the book. “And after getting those kind of responses from people, seeing how much it meant to them to have this history record, I think maybe he was right,” he says. “This is maybe something I was supposed to do.

- Dave Weinthal

For more information about David Carroll’s book Chattanooga Radio and Television go to www.arcadiapublishing.com.

While Carly Hahn may be hell on wheels when it comes to roller derby, the sport actually has been therapy for her in more ways than one.

The athletic blonde and stay at home mom was in a serious accident that required back surgery. After surgery, Hahn was confined to a wheelchair and endured a great deal of physical therapy. She found solace in skating. “Through determination and willpower I pushed through the pain at practices and personal skate sessions,” she says.

Hahn is amongst a growing number of women taking part of roller derby. Yes, roller derby. Until a couple of years ago the last time many heard of the sport, or for that matter thought of the roller derby was in the mid-1970s when these bouts were aired on local TV around professional wrestling. The sport at that time resembled “live wrestling”. In the fact the bouts, as they are called were built more around theatrics than athleticism and skating. The sport found itself falling to the wayside until around 2003 when a revival began to take place.

The sport itself has quite a history. Roller derby has been around in one form or another since 1885. The origins of the sport differ greatly from its inception. The sport began initially as a duration race with the first race lasting six days. By 1914 it was reduced to a 24-hour endurance race. Skaters would race on an oval track. During the 1930s is when physical contact was introduced to the sport.

The sport, which is dominated by female skaters rose in popularity through the 1950s and ‘60s, initially as a touring caravan before establishing regular teams. However, by the 1970s the sport lost focus as it concentrated more on the off-court theatrics than the actual bout itself. Quite frankly men’s professional wrestling lapped them in popularity and theatrics, making roller derby appear more of a sideshow event than an actual sport. The sport for all intensive purposes folded by the mid 1970s.

While revivals for the sport popped up over the next 25 years with one-off matches featuring former skaters it wasn’t until about eight years ago that a grassroots do-it-yourself movement took place and the sport began to see a revival.

Lost in a lot of the revival was a majority of the theatrics, not that there is a lack of personality, but the sport is actually that now – a sport. The bout as it is called consists of five skaters on each team. Four of the skaters are blockers, like an offensive line in football with a jammer, who scores the points for the team. To score, a jammer has to lap the opposing team. They skate in two-minute intervals and the bout is divided into two 30 minute halves. While the game and strategies are way more sophisticated than I’ve described, that gives you a very basic idea behind the bouts and how points are scored.

Once a curiosity and even a sideshow event roller derby is fast becoming a seriously legitimate sport and not a niche game. There is a governing body (WFTDA) and over 800 professional teams in the United States alone. The Scenic City Roller Derby in Chattanooga is the newest affiliate team founded by Hahn and Natalie Mason.

Mason brings a wealth of experience to Scenic City Roller Derby (SCRD). A skater for many years, SCRD is the second team she has launched in WFTDA. She sees her besides as an active player, being an assistant coach and aiding to get the word out about the new team. After a two year absence, Mason is back full force with a mission.

“I am pleased to be working along side very supportive people with this business,” says Mason. “We want to make roller derby as enticing to the public as mix martial arts.”

Things so far have been promising for SCRD. They are busy out seeking sponsors for the team and are receiving overwhelming reaction from everyone they’ve spoken with. The team will have its first recruiting party on Saturday, April 2 at Chattown Skate Park located adjacent to Finley Stadium and First Tennessee Pavilion. Anyone interested in trying out for the team or being a part of the action are encouraged to stop by between noon and 3pm.

After several months of skating Hahn saw her pain beginning to recede. Her doctor initially had concerns with her joining a roller derby team but the activity actually strengthened her body and aided in the repair of her back.

In less than two years Hahn went from a mild-mannered mom running errands to a terror on skates as her alter ego “Ghetto Blaster”. As you will find out if you do any research on the sport, all of the skaters have “skate names”, or an alter ego for the persona they try to exude on the oval track. A lot of the names are pop cultural savvy as the skater takes on a different persona compared to their normal day-to-day lives.
Aside from personality changes brought forth by roller derby, there are also benefits of physical changes. “Not only is it great exercise,” says Hahn. “But it can also help with recovery from past injuries or conditions.” She speaks from personal experience.

“I have personally seen other girls lose weight, gain muscle, and build endurance,” says Hahn.

Hahn is one of the co-founders of Scenic City Roller Derby (SCRD) and unlike other sports there’s more to roller derby than skating around a track. There’s interaction with other people meeting people in the community through the team, making her, Mason and their team well-rounded citizens.

“Being introduced to flat track roller derby has changed my life forever,” says Hahn. The sport has given her an alter ego and a new sense of herself as well as a way she lives her life. “I am stronger, more confident, and definitely a lot tougher than I was prior to my time on the flat track.”

- Dave Weinthal

Little did Jennifer Lawhorn know when she bought Maggo’s, a longstanding restaurant and tavern, it would become the equivalent to the Bluebird Café in Nashville or Eddie’s Attic just outside of Atlanta with all the talent she has showcased.

A few weeks after buying the restaurant, Lawhorn decided to start karaoke on Saturday nights at Magoo’s. The original reason behind it was simple; she was trying to get warm bodies in the place on a Saturday night. “It was a ghost town at Magoo’s when I first started,” she said. It didn’t take long after that for the people to start coming in

It wasn’t long before Lauren came in with her family. Magoo’s has found itself to be a home for young singers since Lawhorn was running a family-oriented restaurant and atmosphere. She actually cornered the market on you talent since she was the only place allowing those under the legal drinking age to sing karaoke in the Chattanooga area. Traditionally in Chattanooga and similar cities, karaoke is viewed as bar entertainment, usually taking place in a smoky bar type atmosphere. “It didn’t take me long to realize I was the only place in Chattanooga that would allow minors, so that benefited me.”

Before long and especially during the last two years Magoo’s has been a hotbed for musical talent, most notably Suddeth. Lawhorn says she was overwhelmed by the amount of talent that has walked through her doors ranging in age from 12 to well in their 60s. The latter is what made her proactive.

One night during karaoke Lawhorn says a man in his late 50’s was on stage and had the most beautiful voice she had ever heard. She asked him why he never pursued music as a career. He told her he had to work and take care of a family and there was no support staff or anyone to direct him or point him in the right direction when it came down to music.

Lawhorn decided to do something about that. She began making monthly trips to Nashville and joined the Reunion of Professional Entertainers (R.O.P.E.). As time and budget would allow she would personally drive two or more local singers from Magoo’s and take them to Nashville to showcase, give them a feel for what it was like to be around other music industry types. “That’s what I’ve been doing the last year-and-a-half, working PR, getting people just to listen to my people,” she says. “You do whatever, just don’t do what I see, I don’t want to see these 16-year-old kids wake up one day and be 55 and be passed over.”

Just over the past year alone Magoo’s has become a fertile stomping ground not only for singers, but bands as well. Lawhorn allows bands on the weekend and acoustic sets during the week around the karaoke. The only day there is no music at Magoo’s is Sunday when the establishment is closed. Much like the karaoke the restaurant is the only true venue in the area to allow young bands to perform. All bands and artists are reminded beforehand that Magoo’s is a family atmosphere and to act accordingly.

After performing that fateful Saturday night at Magoo’s Lawhorn asked Suddeth’s parents if Lauren would be interested in playing a Wednesday evening from 7-9PM. Her parents said yes and Lauren performed in front of a packed house and performed there regularly until her American Idol fame.

It ws at this time that Suddeth met Karen Alayne, co-owner of Fireball Music along with Cathy Gann. Alayne’s Fireball Music offers singing and musical instruction, along with a state of the art recording studio. Alayne, herself is a critically acclaimed drummer who has toured internationally with a list of musicians that resemble a Who’s Who in country music. She was referred to Lauren by Lawhorn, whose cousin was taking drum lessons at the studio.

“The first time I heard her sing, she wasn’t quite sure how to use her voice yet,” says Alayne. “So we worked with her on stage presence and tricks of the trade. We’ve got a really good product on our hands right now.”

Alayne said she found Suddeth very coachable and took instruction well. “She was like a sponge,” she said. She went on to say Lauren had a very teachable spirit, never copping an attitude and never assumed she already knew everything being taught. “Everything we showed her she would put it into practice and the next week throw it back in my face.”

One day Alayne told Suddeth that she wanted to speak to her parents. Suddeth was a little shaken, and asked if she was in trouble. Not at all. Lauren’s parents were sat down and were told, “With Lauren it’s not a matter of if she’s ever going to be a star, it’s a matter of when she’s going to be a star.”

It was at this point that Alayne instructed the family of the good and bad of the music industry. “I felt it was my God-given duty at that moment to explain to them the pros and cons of being a celebrity and let them know what it’s like to be on the road,” she said. Having been on the road for many years herself she was able to relay personal experiences to Lauren and her family. “I think young people need to know all of that.”

While not being able to talk to Lauren during the competition Alayne and Lawson have spoken with family members. The two are proud of the talent they’ve been able to mentor along the way. “Everything she’s learned and we talked about over the past four years she’s put into practice now,” says Alayne.

And while not everyone can be a singer like Lauren, there is plenty to do in the music industry says Alayne. “There’s only one singer and there are a hundred people who make that tour for that singer.” There’s something for everyone if they have the interest and work ethic for it in the music business. The best thing to do is get the exposure where available at places like Magoo’s and seek instruction to become from someone with a well-rounded knowledge of the business.

Both Magoo’s and Fireball Music are helping raise money to finance the expenses to send Lauren’s father and brother to Hollywood for the American Idol shows. Each trip is costing the father and son roughly two thousand dollars for plane fare and accommodations with 13 weeks remaining. Lauren and her mother’s expenses are covered. They are selling Lauren t-shirts and buttons to help raise funds to help the rest of the family. They will also be taking donations at Magoo’s located at 3658 Ringgold Road. They are also accepting frequent flier miles as well to help cover the transportation costs of flying between Chattanooga and Los Angeles.

- Dave Weinthal

Craft beer and all things Irish have gone north - north to Ashland Terrace to be exact.  The week of Christmas brought the Hixson and Red Bank areas a new place to congregate and it’s a bona fide family affair.

McHale’s Brewhouse and Grill opened their doors a few days before Christmas offering authentic Irish cuisine and spirits.

The brainchild of Sidney Hale, he along with cousin Alan and partner Ted Lindsey are all of Scotch-Irish descent and that’s not where it ends.  Even the grill’s cook is from Dublin, having worked in her family’s pubs since age 12.  While offering traditional pub food there is a definite Irish influence down to the authentic Shepherd pie.

McHale’s is located in the old Neighbor’s location and was previously T-Roy’s.  As T-Roy’s the previous owners did a lot of work on the building before closing their doors earlier in the year.  Hale saw the location ideal as it was a perfect spot to entertain people north of the river, especially Hixson and Red Bank wno may be getting long in the tooth from eating at one too many franchise chain restaurant.

“We were looking for a good location,” says Sidney.  “The whole idea behind McHale’s Brewhouse was to bring a little extra -  a bit of culture to Hixson.”

Hale says he has been mulling over the idea of doing something for years.  A former IT guy, he saved away his money looking for the right investment.  It was then when he ran into his cousin Alan.  Alan was a home brewer who enjoyed making craft beer in his spare time when not teaching or dabbling in music.  Once Sidney sampled Alan’s work he knew what he wanted to do – open a brewpub and offer craft beer.

“We’ve talked about doing this for years,” says Sidney.  My mom’s helping out.  My wife comes down and helps out.  We just got to talking one night”

Not wanting to relocate to Connecticut for his IT job the 32-year-old entrepreneur called his cousin and told him he was going to open a brewpub as they had talked about years ago.

Owning a bar is serious business so Hale sought out his friend Ted to be his business partner.  Ted has over 25 year in the bar business and the two seem to work together perfectly.

McHale’s is still a month or two away from being licensed to sell their own brew but Alan has been hard at work putting the system together.  Once they get their licensing they plan to have five rotating beers on tap.  A sixth tap will be open for home brewers in town with customers voting for their favorite each month.  The one receiving the most votes will be featured on tap for a month.

Before McHale’s opened last week the only place to enjoy craft beer and microbrews was downtown where parking is at a premium and despite spin doctors, crime is on the rise.  “We’re bringing something to the north side that’ not really here,” Sidney says.  “Most of the bars in Red Bank and Hixson are just that – bars.

Craft beer has picked up steam in the past quarter century.  For generations most Americans were fed processed and mass produced beer like Budweiser and Miller who cemented their dominance in the market during the Prohibition.  During that era they produced beer that was at or below the legal limit (two percent).  They reduced the alcohol content by cutting back on ingredients that when used in the process of making beer raised the alcohol content.  After prohibition they pretty much kept the same formula, just raising the alcohol content to current levels.  “Budweiser, Bud :Light, Miller, Miller LIte – they’re basically the same style of beer.  They are all American light lagers,” says Sidney.

Alan, who serves as the brew master, owes his new career to a visit to the Czech Republic.  While traveling in Prague he fell in love with the beer there.  “It was readily available and delicious,” he says. 

“I got kind of sad about coming home because I got used to drinking good beer,” Alan says.  “That’s when I decided maybe I can brew it myself or at least try.”

Once back in the states Alan pretty much followed suit and tried making his own beer.  He started with a $50 home brew kit.  After a few trials and errors he found his niche and personal style.  He balances out the artisian in himself creating his concoctions while adhering to his scientific side, keeping track of how much of puts into each batch he makes.  “And it’s a very unique art,” he says.  

“The reason I get so much satisfaction out of brewing is because it’s 50/50 – half science, half inspiration/art,” Alan says.

His best beers Alan says are his lagers and certain pilsner styles.  “The best product that I’ve been able to come out with is usually in the darker range and hoppier.”

Opening the brewpub is something Sidney has been discussing with Alan for two years.  “This is not something that’s spur of the moment,” says Sidney.  “We’ve been discussing what needs to be done for quite some time.  We’ve put a lot into it.”

They looked at a number of locations and the Ashland Terrace property really spoke to them.  “It really is a good location since Ashland Terrace expanded to four lanes,” Sidney says.  “Everybody comes down it now.  This is a main thoroughfare in the Hixson area now.”

“There was quite a bit of planning,  Everything just fell into place.”

Long range plans include expansion and building an actual sand alone brewery and become a regional distributor,” Sidney says.  “Microbrewery is in the golden age right now.  More and more people are willing to accept it and try craft beers – better beers.”

“People are amazed at what they’ll find that they like.  And that’s why we’re here.”

 - Dave Weinthal

Upon entering Triple 7 Studio in the central business district downtown, owner Brent Humphreys gets a unique reaction.  “From time to time I have people wander in off the streets believing we are a traditional art gallery,” he says.

Triple 7 is part of the new evolution of the art of tattooing that put emphasis on the art aspect of it.  The walls of his studio (note the use of word “studio” instead of the stereotypically used term “parlor) are adorned with paintings painted by Humphreys and his collective of tattoo artists that work there.

Tattooing or the art of tattooing has come a long way, especially the way it has been depicted in movies and pop culture for the past century.  The art itself goes much farther back than that actually.  No matter who you may be or where you come from be it a sailor, inmate, royalty or a tribesman, you all share something: the art of the tattoo.

Some scientists say the tattoo goes back to 3300 B.C.  Markings on a mummified body that old with markings is interpreted by scientists and historians as the first known or substantiated tattoos.  Tattoos have been found on Egyptian and Nubian mummies dating back to about 2000 B.C.  Historic writings also reference the art in various cultures and European regions as well.

Tattooing was rediscovered by Europeans when explorers came into contact with Polynesians and American Indians.  The actual word “tattoo” comes from the Tahitian word tattau, which means “to mark”.  It was first mentioned in explorer James Cook’s records form his 1769 expedition to the South Pacific.  Tattoos were considered exotic at the time and in European and U.S. societies, tattooed Indians and Polynesians drew crowds at circuses and fairs during the 18th and 19th centuries.

Applying ink to the skin has evolved as well and was different depending on the culture.  In North and South American many Indian tribes routinely tattooed the body and face by simple pricking and some tribes introduced color into the scratches.  Other tribes would introduce color by making needle punctures into the skin and then a thread coated with pigment was drawn underneath the skin. The Maori people of New Zealand applied their wood carving technique to tattooing.  The popularity of tattooing never really took hold in the west for many years.

William Dampher, a sailor and explorer who traveled the South Seas in the latter part of the 17th century is responsible for re-introducing tattooing to the west.  He brought a heavily tattooed Polynesian name Prince Giolo to London in 1691.  Known as the Painted Prince he was put on display as a money making attraction.  It caused quite a sensation since it had been 600 years since tattoos had been seen in Europe.  It would still be another 100 years for tattooing to make its mark in the west.

In the late 18th century tattoos saw another revival thanks to Captain Cook who made several trips to the South Pacific.  Soon tattooing became a fad as the upper class began getting small tattoos in discreet places.  What kept it from growing out of the fad stage was the slow and painstaking procedure used to make the tattoo.  Each puncture of the skin was done by hand.  The first electric tattooing machine was patented by Samuel O’Rtiely in 1891.  The machine was based on Thomas Edison’s electric pen, which punctured paper with a needle point.  The basic design of the tattoo remains pretty much the same today as it did at its inception.  Once the tattoo became more easily applicable the price became more affordable.  This caused the upper classes to turn away from tattooing since it was now readily available and no longer a luxury.

By the turn of the century the art of tattooing lost a great deal of credibility.  Tattoo artists worked in sleazier sections of towns.  Heavily tattooed people traveled with circuses and “freak shows”.  The popularity of the tattoo in the latter 19th and early 20th century owed much to the circus.  Tattoo was as popular as the circus.  For over 70 years every major circus employed several completely tattooed people.  Some performed traditional circus acts while others were put on display and exhibited in sideshows.  The tattoo artist would travel with the circus and use the tattooed performers to showcase their work.

Chatham Square in New York City is considered by many as the birthplace of the American style tattoo.  While tattooing was losing popularity in other parts, it flourished here.  Tattooing started to lose its appeal here as well once prohibition game and the depression sunk in.  The center for tattoo art moved to Coney Island.  Tattoo shops began opening around the country usually where there were military bases close by, particularly Navy bases.  Tattoos were known as travel markers as you could tell where a person had been by their tattoos.

However, it hasn’t really been until the last 20 years that tattoos or the art of the tattoo became mainstream.  “It’s obvious we’ve seen it hit the mainstream,” says Humphreys.  “That’s because of television shows and whatnot,” he says.

The tattoo culture is changing which is obvious in Humphreys’ shop.  Tattoo artists like him and those in his studio are exactly that – they are artists first.  The human body is their canvas.

In larger cities like Los Angeles, Atlanta and New York and now in Chattanooga there is a bridge evident.  “I’m seeing reputable tattoo artists – phenomenal tattoo artists putting out just as much fine art as they are tattooing people,” says Humphreys.  “They’re putting on art shows as much as they’re going to tattoo conventions.”

Today’s tattoo artist is crossing over between canvas and skin.  “That to me is what I want to do and every artist in this shop that takes art serious wants to be there,” Humphreys says.  “That is the change I’m seeing.”

The previous generation of tattoo artists many times didn’t refer to themselves as artists, instead they called themselves tattooers.  Today art is coming forward and being more dominate.  It’s not about a subculture; it’s not about a rite of passage; not about being part of a gang,” says Humphreys.  “It’s about expressing yourself through art.”

Currently one sees a demand for quality art.  “We’re here because we’re artists, so we’re always going to create something,” says Humphreys.  “There might be some other stuff going on in the industry, but what I’m focusing on is that some of these dudes are doing where they’re bridging that gap between the art world and tattoo world.”

Proof of the mainstream acceptance even in Chattanooga is evident by the location of Humphreys’ Triple 7 Studio.  Located in the business district on Martin Luther King, Jr. Boulevard across the street from the Bessie Smith Hall, most tattoo studios or parlors were located in more nondescript sections of town away from the mainstream. 

Humphreys one might say was a born artist.  “I started drawing before I could write,” he says. 

He got into tattooing because it was the best way for him to make a living as a professional artist,” Humphreys says.  “I’m a working class artist and this is the best way to make money.”

From an artist standpoint tattooing can be frustrating.  “It’s an organic substance in that it’s fickle and you can do your best work, and because the person didn’t take care of it right it cold be completely ruined,” says Humphreys.  “It’s the most sensitive medium I’ve ever used.”

That being said it can be the most rewarding.  “When we’re writing or painting we not only have the viewer in mind, we actually get to put the artwork on the viewer,” says Humphreys.  “When we paint and when we write we’re constantly thinking about the person that’s going to be reading it or viewing it.  You can actually interact with the art.”

The viewer can actually interact with the art as it’s not solely about what is being put on the skin, it’s about the person.  “The interaction between the person I’m tattooing is actually very rewarding and a lot more rewarding than a canvas can be,” says Humphreys. 

While the ink delivery system for tattoo has remained predominately the same since originally patented by Edison, the way the ink touches the skin has.  Modern technology has allowed the needles used to emulate actual brushes with different shapes and sizes.  “They’ve been able to refine the machine to a fine degree that I can simulate a paintbrush, a colored pencil and a pen,” says Humphreys.  “I can do what I do on canvas on skin with high accuracy because of the brilliant people who designed these machines in such a way that they’ve piggybacked the creators of this technology and refined it to a degree that I have so much control over what we’re doing now that I can do portraits,” says Humphreys.

I’m not Salvador Dali,” says Humphreys.  “I got into it by being at the right place at the right time.”

 - Dave Weinthal

There’s a house party in Lookout Valley and everyone is invited.  Keith Burton is the owner of the newly opened Valley Tavern at the foot of Lookout Mountain and wants to welcome everyone to come by his “home”.  I treat everyone here as it they were guests at my house.  In fact, if they were at my house this is how I would treat them,” he says.

“I enjoy being around people.  I always have parties at home, I love cookouts, so I want you to feel like you’re at my home – that I invited you home for a cookout, and we’re gonna sit around and drink some beers, listen to some music and we’re going to eat.  That’s what we always do,” says Burton.  “So why not do it in this setting here – because my house is not big enough to hold everybody.”

Despite his youthful appearance Burton has been in the bar and restaurant business most of his life.  “I used to help my dad bartend as a kid,” he says.  The business runs through his veins as his father before him was in the business and he grew up around it.  He owned bars with his father in Georgia before opening Valley Tavern.  “I’ve always been in the business as a musician or bartender, so it would fit that I come here doing this again,” he says.  “I enjoy being around people.  I always have parties at home, I love to cookout, so I want you to feel like you’re at my home – that I invited you home.”

It was only natural when the opportunity arose to purchase the former Purple Parrott, Burton jumped at the chance.  He had inquired earlier about the location and received a call a little over a month ago to see if he was still interested.  It was and he hopes this is just the beginning of something great for the entire community.  “When the opportunity presented itself and I saw the location, I thought it had a lot of potential,” he says.  “I like the area, I’ve met some of the local folks and I felt like it would be a great spot to try and build something.”

Once he signed on the dotted line Burton made the rounds and introduced himself and patronized the other restaurants and taverns in the community, wanting to spread good cheer and community to everyone. “I wanted everyone to know I’m not here just to make money, but be a part of the community as well,” he says.  “I tried to meet everybody.  I didn’t want to be the guy that just comes into their area and open a bar.  I want to be part of the community, not just a guy in the community.”

Burton has watched the Lookout Valley community grow from undervalued farmland and empty storefronts to a vibrant bedroom community as the real estate boom of a decade ago brought a population growth and more businesses to the community.

Not one to sit on his laurels or anything else for that matter as an owner, Burton is very much a hands personality.  At any given time one may find him working the bar, operating the kitchen, greeting customers at the door or anything else that he sees that needs to be done.

“I just want to make a community bar where everyone can come in and always find some entertainment, something to do, something to enjoy and not be intimidated by the place,” Burton says.  “I don’t want it to be the stereotypical one-sided bar or where it’s a dance club all the time or a live music bar all the time.  I want them to feel like they can come in here any time and find something they enjoy doing and still be a part of the community.”

With experience as a musician and a bar owner Burton has learned over time how to succeed in the business.  “You have to find what the customer likes,” he says.  “I may not like a certain type of music or I might not like a certain type of beer, but I want to make everybody feel accommodated when they come in.”

Valley Tavern operates a full kitchen that serves all the tavern standbys like burgers, nachos and such.  Burton is currently expanding the kitchen.  “I’m looking to do different things.  I want to do a low country crawfish and shrimp boil.  I’ll cook some ribs and we’ll have a rib party here as well,” he says. 

Naming the bar also came from the community as well for Burton.  “In order to give a sense of ownership and a sense of belonging, I asked the local folks that come in here and have beers to help me come up with a name,” he says.  “I put a box on the bar that said ‘Name the Bar’ and had them put suggestions in the box.” 

The name Valley Tavern came from combining parts of two entries in the suggestion box.  Burton thought that best encompassed the philosophy and goal of the place.  “There’s no need to drive all the way downtown or Brainerd if you want to dance or listen to live music.  We have a little bit of everything here for everyone.”

 - Dave Weinthal

Valley Tavern is located at 2819 Cummings Highway

“For a southern comedian if you don’t do well at the Comedy Catch you might as well pack up and sell insurance,” says Tim Wilson.  Wilson, who has put out a number of comedy and country music albums in the past two decades along with being featured regularly on the nationally syndicated morning radio show, “John-Boy and Billy Show” owes a great deal of his success to Michael and Cheryl Alfano, owners of the Comedy Catch. 

The Comedy Catch started 25 year ago this month originally located in the old Dr. Sage’s Entertainment Parlor located on top on the old Holiday Inn at the Golden Gateway.  The club moved approximately a year later to its current location. Six months after the move original owners Ken Sonns and Les McCurdy sold to the Alfanos. Sonns and McCurdy were comedians and wanted to go back on the road and not be tied down to the business.

Alfano, who background was in radio always wanted to be in the entertainment business.  With his parents background of owning a neighborhood bar in New Jersey where he was originally from, Michael took over and hasn’t looked back since.

Over the past two and a half decades the club, which originally was what you might consider in the building’s attic not only grew in popularity but expanded physically with a larger showroom opening on the main floor of the building a few years ago.

A number or artists, who are household names used the Comedy Catch to cut their teeth in the funny business.  A pre-Seinfeld Jerry Seinfeld performed at the club in the mid ‘80s as well as Paula Poundstone, James Gregory, Brett Butler, Jeff Dunham and Ralphie May.

The club attracts many of today’s big names in entertainment including David Allen Grier who appeared last week, legendary comics like Tommy Chong, Gallagher, Mitch Fatel and Kevin Pollak, all who have appeared at the club within the last five years.

Running a comedy club and a club in Chattanooga in general was a learning process for Alfano.  “This is not LA, New York or even Atlanta,” he says. “This Chattanooga and it is a much more laid back town.”  Taking that into consideration is how talent has been chosen for the club.

Comedians with a southern flair tend to work extremely well for the club.  “Some one confrontational like Don Rickles wouldn’t work here,” Alfano says.  The club has been a launching pad for man of today’s top comedians such as Jeff Foxworthy, Ron White, Ralphie May and Tim Wilson, who recorded three of his comedy albums in the club.

“It’s maybe the best club in the south, really.  It’s one of my favorite places to play,” says Wilson, who credits Alfano and his staff for their support and encouragement.

Over the past quarter of a century Alfano has dealt with comics and personalities at all stages of their career – from meager beginnings to television and movie stars.  With each personality he takes the same approach.  “I can judge how they are by how they interact and treat our staff,” he says.  Most have been very easy to get along with while a few have been a little indifferent performing in a city the size of Chattanooga.  “Those I’ll just let them hangout in the green room and come out only to hit the stage.”

From a business standpoint Alfano looked at the way established restaurants and bars were operating when he first took over.  “I would look at the established places like Yesterday’s, The Loft, and the Brass Register, businesses who were well established,” he said.  “Now they are all gone.”  The Comedy Catch actually has been in the same location longer than any other bar or lounge in Chattanooga, situated near the Brainerd tunnels for 24 of its 25 years.  Bud’s Sports Bar has been around a year or two longer, but has changed locations twice.

“When we first moved here there was not more around here except us and Gannon Art Center next door,” says Alfano.  He has been part of the revitalization of the area by the tunnels as a number of businesses have followed suit and have either relocated or opened next door and across the street from the club.

While showcasing international talent Alfano has done a great deal to promote local talent as well.  A few success stories out of the Comedy Catch that are seeing regional and touring further out include Big Ed Caylor and “Cousin” Ricky Pearson, Don Lewis, Roger Keiss and G.R. Goodwin to name a few.  For the past couple of years the club has hosted a Southeastern Funny People Search allowing folks to try their hand at standup. 

Alfano says the competition is much like “American Idol” with him serving as the Simon Cowell of the judges.  “I am brutally honest,” he says.  “There are some people who have great material but no stage presence while you run across others with marginal material but a lot of energy,” he says.  He uses the competition to help tutor some of the aspiring the comics advising them of proper language when on stage, so as not to alienate a crowd. “The newer comics try to be dirty.  They are just sophomoric, like being in a locker room or cafeteria in middle school or junior high school,” he says.  He says being dirty too quick is an issue with a lot of new comics.  “It’s a progression where you should be clean and then as you become seasoned you throw in more blue material.”

Alfano has enjoyed great success running the Comedy Catch.  He has been able to balance running the club and raising his children with his wife Cheryl.  The business has become a family affair as his children work at the club as well now.  At some point, while still a long way down the line he sees his children taking over operation of the club.

“I have watched them build the club up from at the top to adding on, to everything else,” Wilson recalls.  “Michael Alfano and Cheryl are basically my cousins and my brother and sister.”

Congratulations to the Comedy Catch for 25 years in the community and a toast for many more anniversaries to come.

 - Dave Weinthal

Cledus T. Judd helps the Comedy Catch celebrate their anniversary this week performing Thursday through Sunday. For tickets and more information go to thecomedycatch.com.

Much like Superman is Clark Kent’s alter ego and Batman, Bruce Wayne, Chattanoogan Travis Denham as well has an alter ego many are not aware of yet.  Unlike the aforementioned the 34-year-old owner of Lakesite Wine and Spirits doesn’t fight crime in his spare time, he fights the waves of the ocean on weekends racing.

Denham and his team follow the Offshore Super Series Circuit.  His boat, Pirate Racing is in the points lead and their teammate, the Time Bandit is in second place in the points standing.  The boat racing series lasts from early spring to late fall.  In November Denham and his team will be in Key West for the World Championships.

A lifelong boat enthusiast, Denham began racing competitively five years ago, around the time he opened the liquor store.  In five years both have grown immensely.  The store moved last fall into its current location.  The warehouse beside the store is large enough for him to tinker with the boat.  “I have always wanted to do it since I was a kid,” he said about racing boats.

Before opening Lakesite Wine & Spirits Denham worked in the boat business.  “I finally put my money where my mouth was and built my first boat to race,” he recalls.

Denham started racing in 2005 and moved up to a canopy boat.  The boat he has now is a full-blown race boat.

The boats raced are commonly referred to or nicknamed cigar boats.  Cigar boats have an interesting history.  Known for their speed and difficult to detect on radar, the boat was used for bootlegging everything from alcohol to hard drugs.  The boats gained a degree of popularity or notoriety in the TV series “Miami Vice”.

Originally Denham started racing in a boat with an open cockpit.  He finally moved into the boat he uses now which is fully enclosed.  “It’s very hi-tech,” he days.  “It’s purposely built for racing.  It’s something you really don’t want to use as a pleasure boat.”  He compares his boat to taking a NASCAR car onto the streets.  “It’s just not practical.”

Speeds achieved on the boats range depending on class anywhere from 75 mph to 200 mph.  “The boat I’m racing now does the low 90s,” Denham says.  He laughs when asked at the boat ramp about how fast his boat will go.  Some bass fishermen aren’t impressed because their bass boat can reach that speed.  “That’s all well and good.  Take it out on the ocean and see how fast it does,” he says.  “It’s one thing to do 90 mph on really flat water, it’s another to do it in two or three foot swells.  It’s a whole different ballgame.”

Denham is not alone in the water as he has another boat as part of his team, The Time Bandit.  “We’re actually the only team in offshore racing that is a two boat team, especially in one class,” he says.  The sister boat is out of Atlanta and named after one of the boats in the TV show “The Deadliest Catch”.  Time Bandit is black in color; opposite of Denham’s white and is throttled by one of the deckhands from the show, Travis Laughlin.  “We call him Hollywood,” he says.  “Everybody wants to meet the guy from the TV show.”

Racing the boat is a two-man operation with radio communication back to the shore.  The two are position side-by-side.  One handles steering the vessel and the other handles the throttle.  Once in the boat they sit in a very reclined position to where they are almost lying down.  Like NASCAR they have a five-point seat belt harness.  The only thing moving once situated in the boat are arms and their head bobbing around a little.  “You’ve got a helmet on.  Everything is bouncing around,” he says.

Denham relates getting into the boat to getting into a tank.  “You have a hatch on top and you literally go into the boat, shut the hatch and into the seat,” he says.  There is no floor to move around in inside the cockpit.  He relates it to being a fighter pilot, but instead of being one in front of the other, the two pilots are side-by-side.

Putting a crew together was a relatively simple task.  Denham hired people he could trust – his friends.  His team consists of Jeff Germ, Bob Mazikowski, Travis Laughlin and his father. David.  “I got him into racing.  I kind of infected him with my disease,” he says.  “Now he loves it.”

Much like NASCAR the boats in Denham’s class have to all be a certain length and weight.  They all have to run the same engine. “We have a limitation of props and we can’t touch the engine other than maintenance,” he says. 

Even though different people build the boats they all tend to look a lot alike, and all run the same engines.  This makes all teams equal, thus putting emphasis on set-up and driver throttle skills and not who has the biggest bank account or who has the best boat.  “It makes for much better conversation,” Denham says.

To emphasize how similar the boats are Denham recalls recent race in Sarasota where after 60 miles of racing he passed his sister boat coming in second place.  “We only beat them by 300th of a second,” he says.  “Maybe two feet of our bow was in front of them.  It was that close after 60 miles.”

Many factors affect the outcome on the race such as not setting up properly or using the wrong prop or if the drive height is too low.  Even if you are off by just a little bit it could cause another boat to beat you by a couple of minutes.  “There’s a lot of preparation involved before you can go racing,” says Denham.

Pirate Racing has raced offshore up the entire eastern seaboard.  Sometimes the races are literally only a few hundred feet from the shore.  “People stand in the water at the beach and watch the race,” Denham says. 

The track sometimes runs up and down the beach and then into the open ocean and back.  It can be anywhere in length from four to 12 miles.  Sometimes the tracks are an oval while others will have as may as six or seven turns.  Before the race begins helicopters scour the area looking for turtles or manatees and will halt the race until the animals are out of harm’s way.

Contrary to popular belief boat racing is not all fun and games.  Denham says it’s actually work.  Despite being at the beach for the races there is no down time to enjoy the view.  It’s non-stop work for him and his crews.  Actually coming back to Chattanooga is like a vacation for him. Currently his boat, Pirate Racing competes once every two weeks.

At the midway point of the season things are looking good for Denham and his boat, Pirate Racing.  “Thus far this is our best season ever,” he says.  “We are sitting right now in the points lead in the National Championships.  We’ve got a few races to go.”

“As long as we do okay we could potentially be the National Champions for Offshore Super Series, which is something he have never accomplished,” Denham says.  “I’m not saying we’re gonna, but we’re in a very good spot to do that, which is something we have never been able to come close to.”

Denham says this is the best year by far for that.  “We’re excited about that.”

 - Dave Weinthal

One of our favorite comic minds, Henry Cho is one who keeps abreat of what is going on in the world and has a few comments to say about some of them.  Below are some actual headlines from the newswire recently and Henry was more than happy to give us his opinion of them.

YMCA IS DOWNSIZING TO A SINGLE LETTER

Not sure why an acronym needs to be abbreviated.  It's like the speed oven..anything that is faster and simply. Gonna make the Village People rewrite their song?  Guess only the cop gets to form a letter now.  But seriously, I hate to think it's an attempt to remove the "C" for Christian from the title. And what with the YWCA???

WONDER WOMAN GETS A NEW COSTUME, DIRECTION IN ISSUE #600

I grew up with Linda Carter as Wonder Woman on TV....can't imagine any other costume going up in my locker to match Farrah Fawcett's

CANADA'S ECONOMY CAN TEACH THE U.S. A THING OR TWO

I love Canada, was just in British Colombia last weekend. It’s amazing how they have avoided the housing/mortgage debacle...but then again who can't keep a steady economy when your population is snowed in nine months of the year. Like the grizzly bear...they save up instead of spend to make it through winter.

LAWYER: LINDSAY LOHAN JUST DOESN'T GET IT

I never acknowledge any of this fodder.

MANURE HELPS POWER NEW ARMY BARRACKS

Finally places full of it are putting it to good use.

REPORT: BP LOOKS TO BUY UP GULF COAST SCIENTISTS

I can't say enough bad things about BP. Hard to believe what a monster the company is as it continues to destroy part of our nation. What makes me even sadder is to watch folks still pull up to a BP station.

DONALD TRUMP OFFERS RACHEL UCHITEL A SPOT ON 'THE CELEBRITY APPRENTICE'

Once again folks with no discernible talent getting airtime for another mindless audience. I honestly had to google her name to comment on this as I really try to avoid any such fodder from clogging my brain. Had TV cameras not been allowed at OJ's trial I think we would have been spared knowing anything about nobodies.

COURT ORDERS SAFETY FOR WOMAN FACING TORTURE

Sadly this and the following question will have less internet hits than Tiger's mistress.

 - Dave Weinthal

Henry Cho appears Friday and Saturday evening this week at the Comedy Catch.  For tickets and more information go to the comedycatch.com.

“In my opinion Chattanooga is about to flip its economy,” says Caleb Long.  Long is one of seven candidates on the ballot hoping to represent District 9 on the School Board.

“Years ago we were an industrial city,” he says.  “As times progressed we became more of a service industry.  Now with the advent of Alstom, Volkswagen and others looking to come into the area, it would probably be wise of us as a community; as a school system to prepare students not from a vocational perspective, but a technical perspective.”  Long reasons that way students and people in the community can get the jobs that are being offered by these firms locating in the Chattanooga area.

“We could probably see more in the long run if we begin to track ourselves towards a technical perspective,” says Long.  The problem, the first time political candidate says is that the school budget has not been able to sustain that.  “We’re going to have to make some kind of evaluation as far as our priorities for what Chattanooga is about to become,” he says.  “I support whole-heartedly as long as it’s financially responsible to begin to prepare our students for at least the opportunity to take technical classes, if not a technical school.”

The father of one if elected will bring a unique perspective to the School Board if elected next month.  Long has spend time after graduating from UTC in both the white-collar world and blue-collar, where he is currently employed.  “I managed a million dollar budget at one time and came to understand how that wasn’t for me.  Long is now employed as a licensed electrician and is a member of IBW Local 175.  He manages to juggle working as an electrician, raising his son and working on completing his Masters degree in Public Administration.  “The white-color perspective, the blue-collar perspective and the academic perspective, I hope that provides me with the ability to make sound judgments from multiple perspectives,” he says.  I think that role should be played by anybody in a position to make decisions on someone’s behalf.  They should be able to make sound decisions in their role.”

Long feels the schools have lost perspective over the course of time as to what is the best practice.  “What I would advocate is me putting more discretion and more ability in the hands of the principal,” he says.  “It would be my hope that they would act like a CEO of that school, the ability to make decisions based off their unique situation at that particular school and act on it.”

Long says it is a perspective he’s like to refocus – putting priority on the students based off what the principal knows that they need.  Maybe making decisions not from the central office level but at the school level.

The 33-year-old lifelong Chattanooga resident is concerned how the current school board handles their budget.  “I think the current school board has been ineffective at looking at how to pay in the school budget,” Long says.  “There were issues with five central office employee pay raises.  I understand that they should be compensated for work, but I know Ooltewah high school for instance had positions cut.  I think that should be the last task to take to remedy the teaching positions,” he says.  “That’s what I hope to bring from my graduate program to analyze these things to acknowledge these things.  If we don’t protect our teachers, what’s going to happen as a result to our students?”

Long is bidding to represent District 9, which is literally on the doorstep of the Volkswagen area.  Demographic trends point towards the district to become an explosive area.  “Apison Elementary is near capacity.  If Volkswagen and Enterprise South and the area closely related with Enterprise South begins to increase, District 9 will have to look at opening a new school,” Long says.  Other areas in Hamilton County need to be monitored for expansion, he believes.  “I know North Hamilton County is a real large expansion area.  I’m keeping an eye on expansion situations.”

If elected Long says his overall focus will be to keep the focus on the students.  “I was talking with a teacher buddy of mine when I was entertaining making a run at this position,” he recalls.  “I had all kinds of great ideas I want to do.  She told me straight to my face, ‘shut up’.”  The teacher friend told him what he needed to do was to keep in the back of his mind that his focus should always be on the students – whether an issue on how to improve truancy or how to better allocate money from a budget perspective or any other type of policy.  The main focus needs to be does it obstruct or encourage student development.  “This is my main goal – to keep focus and remember why I’m here.  That’s basically to ensure students have the tools that they need to be successful.”

 - Dave Weinthal

Many years ago when the world was a much simpler place an idea was born, or in this case hatched.  What started out as a radio promotion in 1976, who would have thought it would be the juggernaut it became?  The San Diego Chicken, or as most call him nowadays, The Famous Chicken has gone from a simple one-off weekend gig for Ted Giannoulas to become the most famous and wildly popular mascot in all of sports and pop culture.  The Famous Chicken has entertained fans off all ages at baseball, hockey, basketball and football games as well as fans of all ages in eight countries.  Not only is The Famous Chicken an original, but the original mascot.  He is truly the first of his kind.  And to this day not only is he the original; he is the only person to be the Chicken making over 250 appearances a year.

You keep a very grueling schedule that requires you to stay in tip-top shape.  From what I understand you’ve never missed a performance due to injury or illness.  Do you subscribe to a special exercise regime or diet?

The only diet that I concentrate on is to drink a lot of water to stay hydrated at all times.  I enjoy vegetables any way, so I eat a lot of those.  The workout that I did was basically in the outfit itself because I lather up quite a sweat and that’s a workout in and of itself altogether.  So that keeps me in shape as a result.  And boy, have I found it therapeutic.  There’s no fan in there, they’re no cooling pack.  I am my own organic rainforest inside there.  I sweat heavily, but it’s therapeutic in terms of being in a steam bath.

Over the years you have appeared at a wide array of events.  Is baseball your favorite sport?

Baseball is my favorite to perform in.  It’s got the best sense of humor of all the sports – probably for a variety of reasons.  There are so many games, it’s inherent to have a sense of humor when you have to play every day.  The fact that it’s played during a leisure time of the year – summer, adds to it.  And baseball, it’s the only major spectator sport that isn’t played against a clock.  There’s no second enemy – not only the opposition.  The opposition is the only thing you have to worry about.  There’s no clock to race against either.  In football, basketball, hockey you’ve got two enemies if you’re losing.  I think all these things factored in, baseball has the best sense of humor.  My personal favorite?  I grew up in Canada, and hockey has always been a particular favorite.  I certainly enjoy NFL as well as a spectator. 

You have met all sorts of celebrities over the years.  I understand you actually caught the eye of Elvis Presley once.

Yes, that was quite a moment.  It was about 18 months before his passing.  He was doing a concert in San Diego.  As I was doing back then, I would attend all the concerts in my outfit on behalf of a local rock and roll radio station there and I would cavort up and down the aisles.  I was doing this one night with Elvis doing one of his numbers.  I started dancing in front of the stage down below in the aisle.  He cracks up in hysterics right in the middle of a song to the point where he has to double over. He can’t continue the lyrics.  The band is still playing and he’s trying to catch his breath.  He drops to one knee and there is a sudden concern on stage because they think Elvis is having one of his seizures like he had the previous year at his mansion.  So his doctor that travels with him  comes on the stage with this black bag – the infamous Dr. Nick and tries to get Elvis to lay down, thinking he’s had a seizure.  Elvis is shaking him away and saying, “I’m okay! I’m okay!”  Meanwhile, the band is still playing.  He points to me, still dancing to the band’s music.  Elvis is laughing so hard he had tears in his eyes.  The Kleig lights were catching them.  You could see it.  I’m about 30 feet away dancing from him.  So he shakes off his doctor, who pulls up his bag, storms back off stage.  Elvis composes himself after about a minute he picks up on the song.  The band is still playing, mind you and he finishes the number.  He was doing a cover of Jerry Lee Lewis’ “Whole Lotta Shakin’ Goin’ On”.  After the number is done, Elvis takes a moment to apologize to the audience.  He sys, “I don’t know if all you people in the back can see, but you’ve got to believe me!  There’s a chicken dancing in front of the stage here.”  The audience applauds. “Yes, yes, we know” because I’m very familiar with people in San Diego at this time.  So Elvis comes up with a great line right after that.  He says, “I don’t know who put that chicken up to this, but I want to warn ya, but my manager’s name is ‘The Colonel’”.  With that I faint - disgust and fright and I run up the steps of the sports arena and out into the concourse area.  14,000 people got a big laugh out of it as he delivered that line.  I was off to the side of the stage down by the aisle area.  It got a tremendous response.  Some Elvis historians have told me in retrospect, when they heard that story that that’s probably the best laugh Elvis had in his final months of life. So, it stopped the show.  It’s interesting because the band didn’t see me because they were more backstage not watching the audience and the doctor he’s not watching the audience, he’s just more focused on Elvis.  We saw him drop to his knees and couldn’t continue a song.  He literally put the microphone down. (laughs) It actually caused a lot of concern that he was having seizure. He was just doubled over in laughter.  This was in the spring of ’76.

Many athletes have a pre game or post game ritual or meal.  Do you have one for yourself?

I never eat anything before a game.  It’s better to play on an empty stomach otherwise I feel it out there, being animated and putting myself through all that heat conditioning working as I do.  As for any pre game rituals, no, not really.  I have no superstitions in that regard.  I just try to visualize and conceptualize what I am going to do for the evening and just concentrate on the stage.  It’s interesting, Dave, every stadium is a different stage.  There are some things I can do at other stages that I can’t do at others because of how it’s laid out and what I can access.  So I just try to visualize everything in my mind – in my mind’s eye how things are going to shake out that evening.  I try to play it for all the laughs that I can.  There are little things for example like how harsh is the sun shining on certain fans in the early innings, because I know it will be more difficult for them to see what I’m doing if the sun is in their eyes in a certain area of the park, how many will be covered by shade because in the early innings, those fans actually laugh a lot easier early on because they’re in a comfort zone.  Little subtleties like this might be lost on some people.  I, over the years have picked up these instances that I’m getting more laughs at the shady side than the sunny side.  When you look up at the audience half of them have their eyes shielded from the sun.  Once the sun goes down it’s no problem for everyone.  Little tricks like this I look for and recognize certain things I can do here, better things I do here, and what have you. 

You perform at so many different venues do you get like an advance blueprint or map of the way the stadium or arena is laid out so you can map out some strategy in advance?

Oh yes.  If I’m playing a stadium I’ve never played before I try to go online and look at pictures of it and I’ll talk with officials of the club about certain things and get a feel for it.  In all probability I’ll go to the stadium exceedingly early to also look at it as well.  As it is right now, I’ll show up at least three hours before game time - before the first pitch and need be, go a little earlier just to get familiar with the park and its layout – right down to it’s sound system.  It’s like a band would do a sound check at every arena. I will check how the sound is and how the layout under the grandstand is – like can I get around from one side of the stadium to the other underneath without having to go through the concourse of fans.  Once again, every stadium is laid out differently from town to town.  So I just look for these little advantages and disadvantages to work around and try to give the fans as much as I can.

The Famous Chicken has fans of all ages.  To many you might be considered some sort of super hero like Batman or Superman.  That being said, Superman was vulnerable to Kryptonite.  What is the Famous Chicken’s Kryptonite?

Interesting!  What would that be?  I know exactly what that is – RAIN.  Rain waterlogs me.  I am a sponge.  When that rain hits… I’m madder than a wet hen.  It puts an extra 15 to 20 pounds on the outfit. It makes it very sluggish and the mud just sticks to it.  It’s just an absorbent cloth outfit basically made of lightweight sponge and it soaks up – especially the feet. Try to run around with a five-pound bag of sugar on each foot.  That’s how it feels like.  When the feet get waterlogged, when the suit gets waterlogged, I would say just good old-fashioned rain.  It makes it very difficult.  When I get on top of the dugout and the weather is inclement and I’m sloshing around, it’s almost like a dog shaking loose of water when it comes out of a river or pool and they shake loose all that water.  That’s almost how it is.  If I turn suddenly a lot of that water will fan off of the outfit. (laughs) I’ve got to be real careful so fans don’t get the residue of this water.  Rain makes things extremely sluggish and slows down the Chicken to a waddle.

Not only are you a national phenomenon, but international as well.  You have visited numerous countries as well.  How do the other cultures take to the Chicken?

I’ve been to eight countries all together.  They’ve taken to it by and large very well.  It’s interesting, one of the things when I was in Japan, when I first went to Japan I had a friend who said they were holding back the laughter out of politeness, thinking that they might be laughing at me.  They eventually broke the ice at an NBA game.  I get up on the scorer’s table and I’m trying to get the crowd going with dramatic hand clapping while I’m jumping on the table.  The table literally snaps and collapses beneath me like a Three Stooges bit.  The place just lost it.  They just busted a gut.  They thought it was planned. It was an honest accident. (laughs) That really kind of helped break the ice.  Then they realized – this guy, he’s an idiot. (laughs) I just got a sense early on that they tried to withhold laughter for fearing they were being impolite for laughing at me, not realizing that this is how Americans do their sports.  They like to have fun at them.  They bring a sense of fun.  That’s why the NBA took me over there.  This was back in the late ‘80s/early ‘90s – because it gets so quiet at their sports events, especially basketball.  It’s as quiet as an opera and the NBA did not want that atmosphere in the arena.  They wanted to break it up and make it more American – give them more of the American experience.  So they had me over there to break the ice and it worked.  They realized they could cheer/make noise during the action and laugh any time out loud.  That was fun.  That was an enjoyable experience.  Other countries I’ve been to like Italy, it was very enjoyable.  I’ll tell you where they really cut loose is down in the Latin-American countries.  Buy, they let it go! (laughs) it’s non-stop there.  When I go to Mexico they think I’m a walking piñata with all the colors and gyrations.  That’s quite an audience to perform.

You are the original mascot.  Do you often get approached for advice by others who are either mascots or wanting to become one?

On occasion a college mascot might call or some other mascot might call and ask for a little bit of advice.  I try to offer what I can.  I don’t believe in holding mascot schools or anything like that like I’ve heard that’s being held every now and then because I don’t think it’s something you can teach out of a book.  It’s either in you or it’s not.  I look at guys like Michael Jordan.  He had a son that just quit basketball at the University of Illinois because he wasn’t very good, actually.  If Jordan’s your dad and you got tips from him every day and you work out with him, you’ve got his DNA, it doesn’t necessarily translate to being a good basketball player yourself necessarily.  The way I look at it, I’ll offer any tips if I’m ever asked, but I don’t formally go out and set up a school and do things of that nature.  I just learned by the seat of my pants and I just felt it was funny and I had the energy for it.  I just put all those characteristics together to produce this unique act.

I’m impressed by the fact that you are the one and only Chicken.  No one else has worn the costume.  I recognized your voice having seen you on television when I was a kid.  I immediately recognized your voice when you returned my call yesterday.

Wow.

I’m impressed that no one else has worn the costume.

Yes, it has always been myself.  I’ve never missed a single game due to injury or illness.  The only other time I let anybody wear the costume was in the context of a gag.  For example, when I did Wrestlemania Pete Rose wore the outfit.  It was staged and he was trying to get on a wrestler.  He had a running feud with a wrestler named Kane, so he “kidnapped” me backstage, took my outfit, put it on and went out in the ring pretending he was me.  Then Kane got suspicious and ripped off his head to reveal it was Pete Rose.  Then he body slammed him. (laughs)  Then another time I did a commercial for ESPN and I did all the sight gags.  The scenario it was an office campus on ESPN and I’m doing all these practical jokes and sight gags to the little bemusement of frustrated employees.  So here’s all this craziness in the cafeteria, in the cubicles, in the boardroom, on the set, all over. It comes time for the Chicken to take a break so he goes to a quiet corner of the campus lot of ESPN and takes off his head to take a sip of water and reveals it’s Pete Sampras.  Those are the only times anyone has really worn the outfit publicly like that.

A number of years ago Chick-Fil-A created the wildly popular ad campaign featuring a couple of cows carrying signs that read “Eat More Chikin”.  When you saw that did you cry “fowl”?

Yes, yes!  I immediately demanded a summit with the cows so we could hammer out some kind of truce and peace treaty.  They agreed to a peace treaty, but they thought it was piece of chicken treaty.  The negotiations fell apart after that. (laughs) Right now we’re trying detente.  Who knows how we’ll progress?  We need some mediation fast.  The Chick-Fil-A cows are trying to convince me that they’re helping me by eliminating my competition.  I don’t know if I’m buying that.  I just might be dumb enough to buy it.

Can you give me a definitive answer to the age old question of why did the chicken cross the road?

Oh, that’s simple.  To get away from stupid questions!

 - Dave Weinthal

There are many things that point to a thriving city.  Many people and businesses make up the nucleus of what defines a town.  Amongst those doing that include the folks that man the taxis around Chattanooga.

As little as ten years ago getting a taxi in Chattanooga was a crapshoot.  Shady looking drivers, driving cars that quite frankly looked like they would break down at any time as well as a long waits once calling one was the general rule of thumb.  Trying to find one was almost impossible as well.

Within the past couple of years the taxi business has seen a renaissance.  Taxis are in abundance everywhere now with new companies coming in, weaker ones dropping and the companies as well as the city policing the trade.  Chattanooga looks very much like a thriving metropolis with cabs coming and going in all directions all over town.  What used to take upwards to an hour at times now takes literally minutes to hail a ride. 

Not only are they abundant, the actual cabs appear safe to ride.  And drivers behind the wheels today all have a personality of their own making the ride that much more interesting.  One of these characters is “Hollywood” Howard.

“Hollywood” as he’s referred to by everyone, moved to Chattanooga as a teenager actually from Hollywood, Florida.  According to the eight-year taxi veteran the nickname came from two sources.  Besides being from Hollywood, he recalls once being given a hard time by a classmate who asked him, “Who do you think you are, Hollywood?”  He retorted, “No, it’s Mr. Hollywood to you.”  From then forward everyone calls him “Hollywood” or “Hollywood” Howard.

Since moving to Chattanooga and finishing school Hollywood has had many jobs and interests including nighttime disc jockey at a local college radio station, a foray into publishing and working an office job inside a cubicle. 

It was while working the office job that he decided to drive a taxi to supplement his income.  After leaving his office at four in the afternoon he started driving at six until midnight.

The taxi business has grown quite a bit since Hollywood began driving eight years ago, during which time he’s driven for almost every taxi company in town.  “I do see where it has changed and shifted in the eight years that I have been a part of it due to the fact I was one of the first cab drivers to come downtown and actually sit outside of bars,” he says.

On a Friday and Saturday night there were two or three cab drivers that would cruise, but Hollywood got his start by camping out in front of Big River Grill.  “That’s where I got some of my first loyal customers.”

Much like everything else downtown customer volume can be seasonal for drivers like Hollywood.  Besides regulars, who a driver will build over time as they network with local patrons, the summer and holidays are higher volume times for taxis.  “Right now it’s a little slow this time of year,” he says.  Right now on an average weeknight  he’ll average five or six calls.  “On a weekend night it’s more like 10, maybe 15 calls on my cell phone and however many calls I take from the base.

More and more people these days opt to take a taxi when out on the town for drinks than ever before instead of driving.  “There were people eight years ago, they were afraid to get in the taxi because they were afraid they were going to get charged anywhere between $20 and $40 to go to Red Bank,” says Hollywood.  He says people would tell him horror stories of being charged ungodly amounts just to go over the river.  “I try to do it as fairly as possible,” he says.  “I run the meter and then you pay what the meter says.  That way no punches are pulled and people started to appreciate that.”

Have taxi will travel.  Not all of Hollywood’s fares have been around town or rides home after a night of barhopping.  The popular cabbie has taken folks as far as Johnson City, Tennessee and North Augusta, South Carolina.  Both of those cases involved family emergencies.

Despite spending a great deal of time downtown Hollywood hasn’t had many famous people as passengers.  On occasion he’s picked up a CEO and CFO of a very large international corporation.  He did a couple of years ago during Riverbend he had a semi-famous passenger.  A young lady claiming to be Kid Rock’s girlfriend climbed into his cab and needed a ride to the front gate.

Much like a bartender your cab driver can also become your best friend during your trip or you psychologist.  “Sometimes if they appear upset I’ll try to get them to talk about what’s bothering them – what’s on their mind,” Hollywood says.

Despite all the chatter the conversations rarely get deep other than discussing exploits or conquests at the club that night says Hollywood.  “I’ve heard about people’s relationship problems.  I’ve heard all kinds of problems,” he says.  “Once I get them talking about it I try to let them talk without interrupting.  That way it helps get that out.”

Being that Hollywood has worked around the bar and club scene he’s seen quite an eyeful at times in his own taxi.  “People making out – getting busy, so to speak as well as fights,” he says.  The veteran driver says he’s had cases where friends would climb into the back of the cab and end up arguing and before he knew it fists would start flying.

What many people don’t realize about cab drivers is how the taxis are actually operated.  Drivers like Hollywood will rent or pay a fee to drive the cab and the money he makes on that shift goes to him which helps pay for his lease on the vehicle, gas, cleaning and maintaining the appearance of the taxi.

Hollywood has at least one pet peeve as a taxi driver.  “Me personally, it’s somebody that gets in a cab and before they even get in they’re planning on not paying,” he says.  The only recourse a cab driver has in that situation is to call the police.    “I hate having to call the cops,” he says.  He says he’s had to have people arrested before who weren’t regular customers.  They’re usually calls from the base.  “Somebody sits there and has you drive them around town for 30 minutes and then all of a sudden get out and they run in the house and lock the door behind them.  You’re looking at the meter and it says $20 that’s not going to put gas in the tank, isn’t going to pay for the rental of the taxi and isn’t going to help me pay my bills at the end of the week.”

As long as Hollywood has driving he can tell if someone is going to be a potential runner in the first three to five minutes.  “I have a series of questions that I ask and that tells me if they are potentially a runner or jumper,” he says.  “Those are the two terms we use.”

Driving all sorts of people around town as well as a set of regulars Hollywood’s tips are all across the board with the biggest being a $90 tip on a $10 fare. The best tippers according to him are bartenders and servers.  The worst are those who are people who may be unemployed.  They usually apologize for not being able to tip because of their finances.  “Me, personally I understand.  Not everybody does.”

There are a number things as a passenger that one can do to ensure a smooth cab ride.  “I’m not like all the other cab drivers, but I honestly prefer exact street addresses because I found in eight years that when people tell me a general area I start to feel like they’re fixing to run when we get there,” Hollywood says.  “Another thing is a lot of times you may have had a bad day and people tend to take it ot on the next person they see,” he says.  “Sometimes cab drivers have bad days.  A cab driver can sit there and be stuck in traffic.  Then they get yelled at by the passenger because they were late.  Sometimes it just takes a few minutes to cool down from that situation.”

The taxi business has grown greatly in Chattanooga since Hollywood got behind the wheel for the first time eight years ago.  A lot of the drivers are friendly towards each other, almost like a fraternity.  Sometimes there is a little bit of jealousy when one gets more popular than others.

Over the eight years behind the wheel Hollywood claims to have distributed 10,000 of his distinctive orange business cards emblazoned with his phone number 423-503-1986 displayed prominently.  He says he carefully chose the color because it was easy to see in the dark and distinguished itself from other white business cards.

Hollywood is one of the true road warriors in the business.  Drivers tend to come and go.  “There were a couple of times I did get burned out and took a few months off,” he says.  “That comes from the fact that cab drivers work 12 hours a day, six to seven days a week,” he continues. 

All in all Hollywood Howard loves being behind the wheel.  “I love driving,” he says.  The taxi driver says when working in his cubicle at his office job he was going stir crazy and once getting into the taxi he no longer felt confined.  “That was one reason why eventually I chose to go driving instead of advance management at the office.”

Today the way most cab companies are monitored the services are relatively equal.  It’s up to the patron to find a driver they like, one who’s dependable, courteous and also a safe driver be it Hollywood Howard or someone that makes you feel comfortable.

 - Dave Weinthal

With Spring finally in the air a young man’s fancy has turned to… hot dogs, actually.  That is the case for Chattanoogan Jamie Hubbard.

A month ago Hubbard began operating his new business venture, Southern Dawg House.  The local entrepreneur has two hotdog carts in the downtown area and hopes to launch at least one more within the month.

Having literally spent his entire adult life in the hospitality industry and a love of meeting people, Hubbard is hoping the business venture will pay off.

“Chattanooga’s a great city and I can combine my knowledge in the restaurant business with my selling ability,” he says.  For the past five years Hubbard has been on the road in sales and believes he’s found a niche he can fill and stay close to home.

“I did a lot of research into the hot dog business.  It’s not as simple as one might think,” Hubbard says.

A city the size of Chattanooga has hardly any street vendors compared to comparable cities.  The only time sees street vendors is the nine days of Riverbend.

“I put a lot of thought into it,” Hubbard says.  “Traditionally in Chattanooga I would have an eight or nine month window to sell our product,” he says.

A lot went into preparing the business.  Hubbard built one of his carts by hand.  Picking up state and city requirements for the carts he built his first one and unlike traditional hot dog carts, it has an infrared barbecue grill instead of a steamer.  “It’s something that will make us stand out from other vendors that come,” he says.

While preparing his first cart he ran across a second cart for sale by a gentleman in Cleveland who had it for one week and decided to pursue something else.

“All of a sudden I found myself with two carts, and the way demand is, a third one is in our future,” he says.  Currently Hubbard says they are selling close to a thousand hot dogs a week off his carts.

After studying the vendor market and picking up the guidelines from the city of Chattanooga, Hubbard set about putting together his menu.  “We did cost analysis of different brands and different sizes and came up with what we think is a winning combination,” he says.

Hubbard opted for Oscar Mayer all beef franks for his cart.  “Quite frankly I was hoping for something edible and I now have people buying three at a time,” he says.  The price helps with that as well as he sells his all-beef hot dogs for two dollars apiece.  “For five dollars someone can have a nice lunch that includes two hot dogs, chips and a drink.”

Unlike traditional hot dog vendors Hubbard has carved himself a nice niche with the late night crowd.  He began by setting up his cart in Patten Parkway at night strategically located between four nightspots.  Some weekend nights he will still be cooking hot dogs for his patrons at four in the morning.  “Sometimes I have to shut everything down to get the people to leave, otherwise I won’t get any sleep,” he says.

In the first month of operation Hubbard has made many friends and learned a lot about the food service industry.  “There was a lot of waste at the beginning – of everything – hot dogs, chili, propane – whatever we had we were wasting it,” he says. 

Quickly in the first month in business he has learned proper storage and how much product he needs for a shift.  “I think I finally have this down.  There was definitely a learning curve involved,” Hubbard says.

While operations have run pretty smooth for the most part he has run into a little problem here and there.  During his second week in business a windstorm with gusts over 40 mph literally ripped the canvas off his umbrella.  “I’ve never seen anything like that,” Hubbard says.  “I was waiting on Dorothy and Toto to fly by next.”

Southern Dawg House, what he calls his business is kind of a family affair at times.  His father works the cart during lunch where it is usually set up at the corner of 6th and Market.  Even mom has chipped in baking some cookies for them to give away the first weekend they were open.

Claims about hot dog invention are difficult to determine exactly, as stories assert the creation of the sausage, the placing of a sausage on bread or a bun as finger food, the popularization of the existing dish, or the application of the name "hot dog" to a sausage and bun combination most commonly used with ketchup or mustard and sometimes relish.

The word frankfurter comes from Frankfurt, Germany, where pork sausages served in a bun similar to hot dogs originated.

The city of Vienna traces the lineage of the hot dog to the Wienerwurst or Viennese sausage, the city of Frankfurt to the Frankfurter Wurst, which it claims was invented in the 1480s and given to the people on the event of imperial coronations, starting with the coronation of Maximilian II, Holy Roman Emperor as King; the hot dog has also been attributed to Johann Georg Lahner, a 18th/19th century butcher from the Bavarian city of Coburg.

Around 1870, on Coney Island, German immigrant Charles Feltman began selling sausages in rolls.

Hot dog carts are quick and easy food services, supplying millions of people with food every day. The U.S. Hot Dog Council estimates that 15 percent of the approximately 10 billion hot dogs consumed by Americans last year were purchased from a mobile hot dog vendor cart.

Like Chattanooga has things that make it standout from other cities there are a number of hot dog combinations that draw inspiration from around the country.  It seems like most cities have a signature dog.  Hubbard’;s signature concoction in an “Aquarium Dawg” that has two kinds of cheese relish and Pepperidge Farm Goldfish sprinkled on them.

Here are some regional variations:

Chicago - Vienna beef hot dog topped with chopped onions, diced/wedged tomatoes, a dill pickle spear, pickled hot peppers ("sport peppers"), pickle relish, mustard, and celery salt, and served on a poppyseed bun.

Cincinnati - Usually served as a "cheese coney" with Cincinnati chili, shredded mild cheddar cheese, and sometimes chopped onion and/or mustard.

Upstate New York - There are two distinct types of hot dogs. There are Red Hots and White Hots. Red Hots are "normal" hot dogs while White Hots are plumper and were first made by Zweigles of Rochester N.Y.

New York  - The street cart-style hot dog is the Sabrett all-beef natural casing frank, boiled and served with onion sauce and deli mustard—or sauerkraut.

North Carolina - Also with chili and cole slaw, with the addition of mustard and onions. Referred to as a hot dog 'all the way.'

Pacific Northwest - Often enjoyed with some combination of ketchup, mustard, relish, and mayo.

Boston - Often served steamed as opposed to grilled. Ketchup, mustard, relish, picalilli, and chopped onions are common toppings. The "Fenway Frank" is a fixture for Red Sox fans.

West Virginia - Hot dogs are usually served with chili sauce (usually without beans) and cole slaw. When served without a wiener, it is locally called a "chili dog", much to the confusion of non-residents. Click Here for more information about West Virginia Hot Dogs.

Rhode Island - Called New York Style Hot Wieners, and served with meat sauce, chopped onion, mustard, and celery salt.

Providence Rhode Island - Home of the excellent New York System Frank, your basic hot dog covered with a watery, all-beef chili, raw chopped onions and curry powder.

Detroit - Served as a "coney" with chili sauce, mustard, and onions on a steamed bun.

Kansas City - A Dog with sauerkraut and melted cheese.

New Jersey - Several styles of Hot Dogs are popular here: A "Potato Dog" has diced and stewed potatoes, brown mustard and served on spicy Sabrett® brand Hot Dog. "Texas Weiners" (chili dogs everywhere else) are Hot Dogs served with brown mustard, hot and spicy chili and diced raw onions. An "Italian Dog" has fried onions, peppers and potatoes.

Georgia - Especially, South Georgia, has a "Scrambled" Dog (or dawg). This is a cheap, usually red-skinned hot dog, on a toasted white bun and topped with mustard and spicy chili sauce.

Southern Slaw Dog - Topped with mustard, chili and cole slaw.

Whatever your taste or preference it’s Hubbard’s goal to bring a smile to each customer’s face.  “Who knows what this will lead to,” he says.  “Maybe we’re on to something here and can open our own traditional restaurant.”

The Southern Dawg House creator says his carts are available to parties and outdoor events.  He can be reached at sodawghouse@gmail.com.

- Wm. Alexander

Shawn Whitfield and Casey Orr, whose names have become synonymous the past three years to the greater Chattanooga area for their NASCAR news and highlight television program started season number four of their show touting a new name and home.

The first three years of the program it was known as “Valvoline Racing Tonight” on Fox 61.  As of this week the show is now called, “Valvoline Racing Revved Up Powered by Capital Parts Division”.  The pair features Whitfield as the more subdued of the duo and Orr’s straightman will be joined this season by WRCB –TV 3 Eyewitness News sports anchor Keith Cawley.  “We’re very excited about working with Keith,” say Whitfield.  “He’s a guy that is very familiar with NASCAR, but he’s also a guy with a lot of desire to learn a lot more about the sport.”

Whitfield says Cawley will add a spirit to the show that they haven’t had before.  The show anchor may have his hands full with his two co-hosts as he’ll already have his hands full keeping the rambunctious Orr in line.  “They both make the show a lot of fun, where I’m more of the serious guy that’s giving the more serious perspective about the sport,” he says.  “Casey kind of adds some excitement and some of his craziness, and Keith is probably somewhere in the middle.  He’s going to try and keep Casey and I headed in the right direction.”

The television show is part of a three-pronged assault on the Chattanooga that the duo have going with NASCAR.  Besides television Whitfield and Orr have been hosting a radio show for years called “Valvoline Racing Radio Powered by Capital Parts Division” which airs on Rock 105 Mondays and Thursday as well as a column entitled “Up to Speed” in Enigma.

Whitfield says the reception to the locally produced shows has been very good.  “We use each of the three media to the others,” he says.   The duo also benefits from the fact NASCAR is the second most popular sport in the country only trailing professional football.  “It’s been a really good thing and the TV ratings have proven that in our three years at Fox 61,” he says.  “We’re just really excited to take the show to the next level and we with WRCB-TV Channel 3.”

“Valvoline Racing Revved Up Powered by Capital Parts Division” will air twice a week.  The first show is broadcast at 10pm at WRCB’s digital station RTV 3.2, commonly referred to as Retro TV.  The Tuesday show will be more of a post race show discussing the previous weekend’s NASCAR Sprint Cup Series race.  “We’ll be discussing news in the world of NASCAR as well as conversation and opinion,” Whitfield says.

On Saturday the trio will do another show that will be broadcast on WRCB-TV 3 at 9am following “Today”.  “It’s more of a pre-race show talking about what’s coming ahead for the weekend in NASCAR as well as news in the world of NASCAR, conversation and opinion,” says Whitfield.

Expect interview with drivers as the trio plans to get down and dirty as their schedule allows.  They recently came back from spending the weekend at Atlanta Motor Speedway covering the Colbalt Tools 500.

Whitfield says they are excited about their new home on WRCB-TV.  “We feel like this has taken the show to the next level,” he says. The show co-host says the three years spent on Fox 61 has been rewarding, but decided they wanted to move forward with the show and give it a fresh new look.  “Channel 3 has a lot more opportunities for us and they have the capabilities to do the things for the program that we were somewhat unable to do previously.”

Whitfield says he hopes to make the show a little different.  “We’re going to stick to the core of what made our TV program the last three years – talking a lot of the basics of what goes on in the sport of NASCAR week in week out,” he says.  “However, we’re working in some new creative ideas to try and bring the NASCAR fan a little different perspective about the sport that’s different that what they can find on Speed, Fox or ESPN.”

 - Dave Weinthal

Joshua Coleman is a sculptor.  Not only is he a sculptor, he’s a visionary.  The Cleveland, TN artist sees beauty in what others discard, turning the unwanted into things of beauty.

On any given day not far too from his studio inside the Old Woolen Mill Coleman can be spotted scouring through a local scrap yard looking for material for any number of projects he is working.  One man’s trash becomes this man’s treasure, and especially in this case, his art.

“I never thought of it in the concept of recycling it at first because it was the only material that I had around me,” says Coleman.  “I knew how to weld and I had to learn more about those recycled materials.”

In his hunt for material Coleman predominantly found metal, alloys and stainless steel and copper pieces.  “Being able to use these, it has inspired more use of it,” he says. 

But how does one see art in a discarded piece of metal?  “I go at it in two ways,” says Coleman.  “One is that I see it as a preexisting concept and I’m going out on a mission to find material that will meet that particular curvature or need.  The other aspect is that through my ignorance of what a crankshaft is supposed to like.” He explains.  “What are these things?  I look at it in shapes.”

Coleman sees beauty in the shapes manipulating them for his sculptures taking them out of their original environment and putting them in a new and different setting.  “It’s like Marcel Duchamp,” he says.  “He put a toilet on a wall.  That sounds pretty ridiculous.  It’s kind of a theme for why he did that for a reason,” he says.  The shape of the urinal is what makes it art.  “There is beauty in shape,” he says.  “That’s why he put it out for people to see.”  The artist obviously found beauty in that.  “He put it up for other reasons of course, but there are concepts that go along with that and that’s where I see more into the simplicity of shapes and materials that we have in our everyday.  It also brings people that can relate to that more into that perspective of relating into your art.”

Using recycled materials is a trial and error experience.  “I organize my shop a certain way,” says Coleman.  The Cleveland sculptor organizes his materials by shape.  From those shapes he will cut and paste until he gets the result he is looking for.  What he doesn’t use as well as the odds and end pieces that he cuts off he’ll put in another pile to use on another project.

“Concepts to me are what drive the idea,” says Coleman.  It is these concepts that drive him to search for materials and in seeing the image of what it is and eventually bring that image to life.

Coleman’s sculptures are art with a degree of science and engineering involved.  A good example of this is his cow sculpture.  It’s a life size sculpture of a cow complete with moving parts.  One is almost invited to interact with it.  The neck and head move as the piece invites interaction.  “When I look at the anatomy of a cow and that’s what happened to be the example for this project, the use of the material when you’re building a cow – I mean a real cow you have equal and opposite elements,” he says. 

While creating art from recycled material Coleman keeps in mind the commercial viability of his work. “At my condition of being an artist, I don’t have that trouble because I don’t have people desiring me in a way that is out there,” he says.  Taking consideration the environment the piece will be displayed comes into consideration as well.

Many of Coleman’s sculptures are commissioned pieces from various organizations such as hospitals and businesses both public and private.  He thoroughly enjoys working with a deadline to deliver his creation.  “I thrive on being able to,” he says.  “Being visual, I’m able to organize it in my mind, set it up, put it out and get it ready.”

Coleman has to deal with changes on occasion to the original concept, be it coming up with another idea or his client suggests something different.    “I’m okay with it if I honestly feel if the process can be dome during that time,” he says.  “Quick decisions are honest decisions.  If you can stay honest with your concepts and push within that then the real artist in side you is coming out without any hesitation.”

Coleman adds if the artists stops and over-analyzes the situation then they lose the whole capability that one has as an artist.

Finishing the assigned project and not doting over it like a stage mother also plays into the artist’s forte.  Also from a commercial standpoint once Coleman gets finished with the project he in turn gets paid.  While art is often conceptual and creative, it also is a business. “I like to be a good steward.  I like to be prepared,” he says. 

While enjoying getting a sculpture done quickly is often desired, there’s more than a commerce reason for this philosophy.  “As an artist you over analyze it,” says Coleman.  You figure out other ways of looking at it and it changes.”

“There’s a factor that comes into your mind that says this is finished,” says Coleman.  And when finished you have a pure satisfaction in you that if I do any more to it I’m going to ruin it.”

While Coleman’ sculptures adorn regional locations such as hospitals, the History Museum at 5ive Points and private collectors, his greatest sculpture or work of art is quite possibly his home. The home as with his sculptures was created from recycled material.

A number of years back Coleman’s father purchased the Old Woolen Mill located off Inman Street.  The multi-level multiple blocks in length mill has slowly been undergoing a transformation back into usable space.  Very much still in the conceptual stage, it is where the sculptor has his studio. 

Helping his father cleaning and clearing up the long-abandoned building, Coleman pulled out a great deal of timber and brick, incorporating them into his greatest sculpture to date – the house where he and his wife raise their two children.

“From the beginning with my art I found beauty in these found objects and it was also very rewarding to see a redemption of a material that has been gone off to death or something,” says Coleman.  “But to see it come back into a life of existence, and you also admire the material.  You also enjoy and admire it from a new perspective – in a new light.”

In constructing the house new use was made of found bricks and reestablished a design inside the home.  Old floors from the mill that were tracked and over were treated and stained giving them new life.  The finished product would have made Frank Lloyd Wright proud.  “Frank Lloyd Wright took a lot of his designs and brought it into his environment,” Coleman says.  “He built homes according to the materials around that environment.”

Building the home was every bit a sculpture for Coleman as any of his other works.  “The concept was a big thing,” he says.  “The site was the perspective.”

Building the house was the easy part for Coleman.   The actual construction of the picturesque house located on remote farmland took nine months.  The design, the planning and collection of materials both new and old took a couple of years to bring from concept to reality.

A lot of thought was put into the color scheme of the house as a neutral color scheme was adopted for the house.  “We wanted the audience that was in it to circulate walking around to be what the main focal point was,” says Coleman.  “I don’t want loud and bright walls.  I wanted something very neutral.”

The thought behind the neutral tones was to let the walls be a virtual canvas to the inhabitants – his family and guests provide the color.  “I want a house that is conceptual, that people walk all through it and see the inner workings of it in a more conceptual perspective,” Coleman says.  “So why not allow the people and the color that the people are to shine?”

Coleman used his abilities as an artist and sculptor to create the ideal place to live for his young family.  “It’s just a big sculpture that you live in,” he says.  “Every aspect is conceptual, functional, specific and beauty in everyday use.”

Coleman was an upperclassman in high school when he became inspired to become an artist.  He initially found art a way to make an easy “A” while finding enjoyment at the same time, never thinking it was something he would do the rest of his life. 

As with any artist Coleman deals occasionally with viability and relevancy, as a majority of his work is commissioned and bid related.  “It has become therapeutic in a way that I can make money being therapeutic,” he says.  “I’m passionate about it in every aspect and my family keeps the passion burning to continue to seek what you’re good at to provide an income that can meet our needs.”

 - Dave Weinthal

Seems like only yesterday Pauly Shore broke onto the comedy scene hosting MTV Spring Breaks and making a series of movies and television shows.  Fast forward 20 years and he’s as busy if not busier than ever.  He has two films coming out, one produced by Adam Sandler and the other a mockumentary that takes to task Hollywood’s obsession with adopting children from far away land.  Also on the front burner is a pilot for MTV and a tour that will take him all around the globe.

You have a new mockumentary coming out soon.

June the 8th. 

I just watched the trailer on it.  I loved it.  It seems that the Hollywood establishment seems to be on a mission to save the world.

Yeah.  I think that’s a cool thing that everybody’s into that, but it’s trendy as well, you know?  I think you help homeless people.  You help people out whether it’s adopting or homeless people, this or that.  It doesn’t matter as long as you’re being a good person.

You’ve got a number of projects in the works now.

There are a number of things.  There’s a Showtime special that I just did.  I did another film that Adam Sandler produced.  I’m working with Will Ferrell’s company on some website stuff, an MTV show.  Our pilot got picked up for MTV, so I’m developing that.  I have two scripts that I’m working on as well.

What do you think of MTV officially dropping “Music Television” from their name?

You know what’s funny?  I just heard about that.  What is it called?

It’s still MTV, using the same logo but dropping the words “music television” from it.  Of course that has been a running joke for years that there was no music on MTV.

Well, I think it’s good that they dropped the music television – because it’s not music.

You had some inside knowledge of what it was like doing comedy before you hit the stage for the first time because your mom owns the club.  Did she give you any insight or advice from her standpoint as a club owner?

I think in life in general you shouldn’t give anyone any advice.  I think you’ve got to kind of figure it out by yourself, especially with standup comedy.  It’s not like it’s a formula.  You’ve just got to figure out your own style.  It’s almost like lifting weights.  You know what I mean?  What type of workout works best for you?  Standup is the same thing.  What works for you?  Because everyone’s different.  Everyone develops their act different.  Everyone writes different.  Everyone’s process is different.  Just like every rainbow is different.  So there’s no real structure and there’s no advice.  If anything it’s tell the truth.  It’s just try to tell the truth.

The truth is often more funnier and stranger than fiction.

Exactly. 

You have a new show coming on MTV called “The Shores”.  Is that a reality-based show?

It’s kind of a hybrid, scripted.  It’s just a pilot. 

What is your opinion of all the reality TV that has taken over the airwaves?

I don’t know.  It’s terrible.  Some people like it.

It seems to have given birth to a lot of industries out there like TMZ, turning that into a goldmine.  Are you happy when you get home at night and don’t hear your name mentioned on shows like that?

Yeah, I think so.  The problem is you don’t want to be more in the media as opposed to more of your work out there.  You’d rather your work being the thing that people talk about as opposed to who you’re fucking.  So yeah, it’s kind of a problem.  But some people do a good job I guess, staying away from it.  I live right in the heart of it, so it’s like I have no choice unless I don’t want to go out of my house.  All the good restaurants, all the people are like why are you and TMZ here.  This is actually really good food here.  I want to eat.

Does that hurt you as a comedian with all the extra exposure out there?  Part of a comic’s routine is about sharing experiences and storytelling and putting your twists and turns on different experiences whereas it’s hard to be out in public anymore to actually see what’s going on.

Yeah, like I said, it’s terrible.  Look at Tiger Woods. Anytime there’s a celebrity that’s done something that everyone else does all of a sudden the celebrity is frowned upon.  Look at John Edwards.  Obviously what he did was terrible but if your neighbor did that nobody would know.

I was watching previews of Adopted.  It reminded me a lot of the film you put out a few years ago called Pauly Shore Is Dead, which is one of my favorite movies.

Thank you.

I think in your way, you are showing the absurdity of being a celebrity.

The thing is, with me I like to pick subjects that are serious and make light of them.  Adopting children from Africa is a very serious subject.  People don’t take it lightly, so that’s why I did a film about it.

You’re one of the few comedians left out there that doesn’t mind making fun of themselves.  You’re more self-effacing than most celebrities.

Fortunately for me the way that I’ve been running my business is I control everything.  I was hired by Warner Brothers to do a film about adoption called Adopted about a celebrity that adopts a child.  I don’t think I’d be able to pull off the stuff I pulled off.  There’s too many cooks in the kitchen, you know? 

When you’re doing standup how scripted is your show?  Do you gauge it by the audience in which direction or how long you’ll go?

Yeah.  I like to feel it out.  I don’t like to get too prepared.  If you go too prepared you get tired.  But I like working in Chattanooga.  I’ve been to that club a couple of times.  It’s just one of those clubs.  It’s like a Mom and Pop club.  It’s really fun.

After Chattanooga you’re headed to Australia and New Zealand in the spring.

Yeah.

What’s it like playing in other countries?

I actually like it better, to be quite honest. 

Americans tend to be kind of jaded.  Do you find the foreign crowd more accepting or into what you’re saying?

Yeah, exactly.  America is very jaded.  Even Canada is way better to perform in than America.  America kind of sucks to be honest.  People yell shit out.  People are jaded like you said.

You tell me your self-contained, running your own business, so to speak.  Do you think that has helped with your public image? It seems once a comic gets into movies they studio will try to change their public perception to be more in line with the studio’s agenda, using the comic for name recognition factor at first.

I don’t know.  I just don’t really deal with them.  I kind of do my own thing, you know?  I’m a filmmaker now.  I do my own stuff and if they want to cast me in things then I just read what they want for me to do and kind of decide if I want to do it.  I’m not really in a place where they’re offering me big studio stuff.  So I’m doing my own stuff.  I pave my own style, pave my own way and then hopefully things will work out and I have more control of that.

Have you always been in control of all your projects?

I’ve been in control the last ten years.

What’s the difference between standup Pauly Shore and the Pauly Shore we saw in Encino Man and some of your earlier comedies?

I was just younger, that’s all.  That’s basically it.  I was in my 20s.

You don’t feel like you get to express yourself more now than in some of those early works?

No.  I rewrote a lot of my stuff back then.  It wasn’t like someone wrote my stuff.  They would write it and I would rewrite it. 

How have you enjoyed being on the road the last couple of years?  Has it been more fulfilling than when you first started?

I think it’s made me get better at doing what I do, that’s all.  It’s like going to the gym.  You keep doing it.  You get better.  There’s almost like a fine line where you’re always trying to get better and better, and I think in life you have to do in order to get better.  I think I’m just getting better.

 - Dave Weinthal

Pauly Shore appears at the Comedy Catch Sunday night.  For reservations and more information go to thecomedycatch.com.

Initially what started as a childhood fascination with fashion and history, Susan Jarrett has caught the eyes of Hollywood and few in the Tennessee Valley realize she is one of Chattanooga’s own. 

Jarrett is the founder and owner of Maggie May’s Historical Clothing.  While few in Chattanooga may not know for sure who she is, they undoubtedly know her work.  The producers of National Treasure 2: Book of Secrets starring Nicolas Cage had Jarrett create a piece of clothing seen in the opening sequence of the movie.  Spike Lee’s 40 Acres And A Mule Filmworks also contracted her to make a bonnet for one of their productions as well.

Little did Jarrett know when she was sketching fashion in her notebook during class she would get such calls.  With great interest in fashion and History, for which she received her degree.  Until a few years ago she was a college instructor until her company began to garner attention. “I loved history of course,” she says.  “My love of fashion history has manifested itself in the creation of historical clothing.”

Jarrett began initially making historical clothing for hobbyists and enthusiasts.  “The more I researched and the more detail I started putting in my clothes and the more accurate I got with my clothing, the more expensive it got because it took too much time,” she says.  The completion of a dress will take a minimum ten to twelve hours.

The finite detail and attention put into creating a costume is what distinguishes a costumer from what Jarrett does.  “I’m a costume historian,” she says. 

In being a costume historian what Jarrett does is recreate clothing from the past.  A general costumer is more interested in the final product and how it will look on stage or under stage lighting whereas a historical costumer creates the outfit period correct.  That means using the proper material and proper construction of the clothing.  “I do a lot of research on the clothing,” she says.  The work she does at Maggie May’s is more or less a museum kind of reproduction.

A majority of those that come calling to Maggie Mays are museums and over the past couple of years Hollywood, individuals and business looking for exact recreation of period pieces.  “The thing that really affected me is I’ve out-priced myself out of the hobbyist and enthusiasts market and now am working for museums and people that are looking for that authenticity,” says Jarrett.

While styles and mores have changed over generations and centuries, one thing has always been a constant even in the most puritanical times – the female form.  Today’s fashions can accentuate or display a woman’s form through varying necklines, hemlines, fabric and accessorizing.  In earlier centuries, while women traditional wore more clothing, their shape was altered to display what many considered the ideal shape, that of an hourglass.  Instead of plunging necklines you had corsets that would literally squeeze a woman’s midsection and produce or gave the illusion of an able breast and fuller hips.  During the mid 1800s women were literally if not jumping through hoops, wearing what appeared to be a series of hoops that were worn underneath the dress to achieve the same affect.  While it was a little less binding and painful, it still was a lot to lug around to achieve the classic perceived ideal shape.  Following World War I as when hemlines rose and necklines started to drop or be altered.  And while clothing was getting smaller and smaller at this time women generally still wore a girdle, which is an updated version of the corset but a little less painful to wear.  The girdle stayed in vogue until the late 1960s although it remains to be found in department stores today in some form or another.

Color has been an important part of fashion over the generations as well as Jarrett has seen and studied in creating her historical pieces.  “In the 1800s everything was kind of pastel white,” she says.  “American costume is very much influences prior to about 1950 from France, England and Europe,” she says.  Her specific interest is in American costumes.

Prior to the French Revolution it was a flamboyant, gaudy era for clothing Jarrett says.  There was a rebellion against that and it was replaces with a simple white with maybe a bit of pastel.  “Real classical, real simple Grecian kind of styles,” she says.

“Then we got into the 1860s you have the invention of the color mauve,” Jarrett says. Mauve is a pale lavender lilac color, one in the many ranges of purple.  “It’s a really garish, gaudy color,” she says.  Bright, bold colors are once again in vogue but by the turn of the century it reverts back to white and more pale, muted colors.

When recreating clothing from a specific time period many factors weigh in on how Jarrett creates the costume.  “The color is really, really important.  Pattern is really important,” she says.  How the fabric is and made all factor in.  “It’s all extremely important to the time period we’re working in.”

Jarrett’s work at Maggie May’s goes beyond just clothing.  She is also a milliner.  She creates the appropriate headgear for that era as well.  Through the centuries and up until the late 1960s it was customary for both the man and woman to wear appropriate headwear.  The hat was a measure of social status in the past.

While examining her work, it’s obvious that Jarrett has done her research and her attention to detail.  But with detail and attention comes cost.  “That’s something that’s somewhat difficult to explain to a lot of everyday people about why my prices are what they are,” she says.

Jarrett has also kept a close eye on the closing of the garment district in New York City.  Prior to 1960 roughly 90 percent of the world’s garments were produced in New York City.  As of 2000 less than 10 percent are.

This affects what Jarrett does at Maggie May’s.  The historic costumer says she tries to buy things local.  All of her wood buttons come out of what’s left of the garment district and the fabrics come from Pennsylvania. Everything is made at her studio in Chattanooga.  “I am proud to say it is American made.”

“One thing I explain to people is that everything I do is individual,” says Jarrett.  “It’s more like a work of art.  It’s one piece.  It’s not like you’re going to get another piece like this.”

While Jarrett may use the same fabric and the design the same, it is never going to be exactly the same as the previous piece.  “So everything is unique.”

Maggie May’s Historical Clothing recreates 200 years of fashion, from 1750 to 1950.  To delve further into the work of Jarrett and see why museums and Hollywood producers call her go to www.maggiemayfashions.com and explore and take a step back in fashion history.

 - Dave Weinthal

Dennis Palmer is a visual artist, musician and vocal-teller whose work is directly influenced by his roots in the Chattanooga and has shared his wealth of talent and nsight with the world for over a quarter of a century. He has exhibited in London and Los Angeles, and has received critical acclaim from both the European and American press as well as designing CD and record covers for Britain’s Incus Records in addition to many other U.S. labels. He is the Artistic Director and co-founder of the Chattanooga based Shaking Ray Levi Society, a non-profit coalition of visual and performing artists formed with the goal of promoting improvisation in both thought and performance.  Friday, Dennis’ newest showing, “Portraiture: The Etheric, Astral and Apocalyptic” opens at Tanner Hill Gallery.  He recently took a few minutes to talk visual and musical art.

Your name is synonymous with the Shaking Ray Levis.  How long have you been involved in the arts in general?

All my life.  Chattanooga’s kind of interesting.  Art was always encouraged although we might have had art classes per se or music classes per se in the Hamilton County school system, there was always a freedom to always create.  It’s always been a situation that’s been available to me, anyway growing up.

What medium do you work with when you’re creating your visual art?

It depends.  This current show I’m using acrylic paints and I’m painting on paper.  A few pieces are on canvas and on masonite.  The majority of the pieces in this show are on paper.

How did you decide what kind of material to use to create these pieces?

In the case of the acrylics I had a small home studio.  I’m not dealing with the chemicals that you would deal with with oil paints.  It’s more out of my small environment that I’m using water-based acrylic color.

Most musicians hen you ask them who or what inspired them they will name other musicians.  As a visual artist who has inspired or influenced what you do?

It’s funny.  If you go back in your life and look back and identify your esthetic and what that is, in music you go back.  Today, I’m 52 years old and I go back to my generation and all the different types of music that they started out from and we end up listening to when we were six years old.  It becomes quite a history.  I’ve always tried to be really aware of that in both music and art.  And for art, obviously, Chuck Jones of the Warner Brothers cartoons is a huge influence.  Of course there were several Walt Disney artists, the ones more towards the late ‘50s, early ‘60s style cartoons, and of course Dr. Seuss was another huge influence.  But a really big influence was an artist by the name of Basil Wolverton.  Basil Wolverton also did Biblical illustrations for the Church of God.  He worked as an artist working for Topps, the bubble gum card company.  Back in the ‘60s there were these cards called Ugly Stickers.  Everybody had to have an Ugly Sticker.  It was basically a crazy looking monster or alien with a standard name like Alan, Leonard, Jim or Randy.  You would put these things on your lunch boxes and your notebooks, or slap it on somebody’s back. (laughs) He was an incredible artist.  You would also see a lot of his work – he was all over the place at the time.

When a musician has 10 or 12 songs to record they usually have enough material for an album or an EP.  As a visual artist how do you know what is the right number of pieces for a showing?

I actually haven’t had a show of work just by myself in over a decade probably.  This show taking place at the Tanner Hill Gallery is the first since 1999.  In this, I always look at the space, what is the space like, and not just to have enough to fill it out,  but I’m definitely working in this case at Tanner Hill Gallery I’m working a little bit larger than I usually would work.  For years I’ve been working doing CD covers and commission pieces which tend to be rather small.  When I say large, a lot of these pieces are 20 by 30 – that size.

When you put together this new show was it with the intent purpose of putting together a collective set for display?

I played around.  The title for it is “Portraiture: The Etheric, Astral and Apocalyptic”.  I’m definitely playing around with the apocalyptic theme.  That’s so the rage these days.

I notice the use of a lot of bright color in your work.

Yeah.  That tends to go back reflecting on what I grew up with.  I’m definitely playing with the color wheel – a lot of complimentary colors and a lot of playing with tint and shade, too.  My main focus with this in particular is line and how the line is functioning in each of these pieces that’s going to be in this show. 

Does your music influence your art that you create?

Yes, and vice-versa.  It’s hard to separate the two when you’ve behaved like this for so long. (laughs)

You’ve had showings in London, Los Angeles and other large metropolitan cities.  Compare the reception to your work here to the larger markets.

I incorporate a lot of humor into the work and I think that’s something folks regardless, if I’m talking about a carp at Lake Winnie blowing the apocalyptic trumpets in a piece, people, they don’t have to know Lake Winnie, they’ll find that funny.  Here, it goes a little bit deeper if they saw one of the carp at Lake Winnie playing one of the seven horns of the Apocalypse.  I think folks can get the humor, or it’s something that is understood, I guess.  It somehow seems to work equally in London as it would here in Chattanooga.

One thing I noticed about your work is it has a more universal feel to it.  It doesn’t have a local or regional feel.  That being said, what does through your mind as you create a piece of art?

When we were working in schools with music we had this one thing we always end with that we do that you would consider an exercise.  We ask everyone when was the last time you had a good feeling.  Well, hang on to that good feeling.  Clap your hands once and put your hands over your heart and give that good feeling to yourself.  Next is to clap your hands again and sound off and give that good feeling to everybody within the room.  The third thing is to clap your hands, sound off and give that feeling out off to the whole universe.  That’s pretty much the way I feel that when I’m working, there are certain things I do for myself, certain things I felt there are for folks within a certain community and then there’s those that I feel that I’m doing for on and beyond.  I think of that both when I’m playing music and painting.

Over the past decade the arts community in Chattanooga has really flourished and been appreciated more.  You’ve been here your whole life an in that time we have all seen plenty of artists come and go.  You’ve had the opportunity to move on.  What made you decide to keep Chattanooga as your home base?

With the internet it’s a lot more comfortable to stay in a place where you’ve got your mechanic or you have plumbing problems you know who to call and still do your artwork.  There’s a comfort zone about staying in a place where these necessities for life are.  We travel, play music all over the country and into other countries as well.  We live here and we decided to work out of Chattanooga, and how we were talking about how our environment has changed in the printed medium but as well as the art world and the way music is bought and sold, something’s happening.  In that sense it’s easier to – you don’t have to be in an art Mecca to survive.  I think Chattanooga itself has always been really supportive.  I think the Allied Arts has done a fantastic job over the years.  Here recently you’ve had the CreateHere folks do some very interesting things.

When you begin a piece of art do you have in mind how you want the finished work to look like?

Sometimes things happen that way and other times I have a lot of notepads that I write thoughts and ideas on.  That can usually start as the starting point and then it’s more than likely liable to turn into something completely different.

Is it as improvisational as music can be?

I would say about half and half.  Sometimes I will work on a painting and have no idea what these images, what this arrangement of shapes and color, what they really mean.  That’s very much like an improvisational event.  A lot of times people get the idea with improvisational music in particular that you’re going crazy – anything goes.  It’s not that.  There are ideas and thoughts that are incorporated from going dark to light and the dynamics that are incorporated, you’re dealing with a lot of things.  It’s not just bounding off the walls with a horn in his hand or in the case of painting, blindfolded and impulsively scribbling what have you.

 - Dave Weinthal

Dennis Palmer’s “Portraiture: The Etheric, Astral and Apocalyptic” will open Friday at Tanner Hill Gallery located at 3069 South Broad Street and will be on display for a month.  For more information go to tannerhillgallery.com.

Keith Alberstadt grew up the son of a Vanderbilt professor and a craft artist. The result . . . a very clever comic with sharp perception, unmatched creativity, and a treasure trove of unique material. His likable personality and down-to-earth charm invite people into his brand of humor -- one that is smart but not brainy and relatable but not hacky. A regular performer for the U.S. troops in Iraq and Afghanistan, Keith has been described as "absolutely hilarious" by Armed Forces Entertainment and "a hidden gem" by the Boston Globe. He's also a contributing writer for Saturday Night Live's Weekend Update, Jimmy Fallon,  National Lampoon and various online magazines.

You have an interesting story to tell.  You attended Vanderbilt, considered a southern Ivy League school, which is located in Nashville, the heart of country music business.  I guess you’ve seen some interesting things.

It was a nice little juxtaposition down there. It was a great town to grow up in.  It was a premier place to start a comedy career because it is so central to other cities.  I saw some interesting things.  It was pretty good.

I guess you have to develop a sense of humor to enjoy the football team Vanderbilt usually has.

Yeah, and you know what?  I’m so competitive, too.  I worked in the athletic department for four years after I graduated.  I had trouble with professionalism as a sideline reporter which can be very difficult to do because I’m so intense.  I’m cheering for Vanderbilt so hard that it is very difficult to stay objective at times.  But what are you gonna do?  You’ve got to laugh at some of the bonehead moves and some of the laughable moments.  There’s no other option.  You’d go crazy.  I think a lot of the coaches did before they left.  I think they lost their minds.

I guess you were happy to see the Titans come to town.

You know what?  Kinda.  As a sports fan I was.  It was definitely good for downtown.  It rejuvenated downtown.  But as a Vandy fan, especially in the job capacity I was in – I was selling corporate advertising.  I saw my job getting a lot more difficult because advertisers who wanted to advertise in the sports realm are going to gravitate towards the professional realm and not necessarily towards Vandy especially with Vandy’s win-loss record.  So it was kind of bittersweet.  I was pumped as a sports fan but as a Vandy fan I was a little distraught.  Then they were playing in our own backyard for two seasons at Vanderbilt stadium.  So it was kind of inescapable.  But overall, absolutely – I was very pumped. Them and the Preds (Predators).  I was very proud of Nashville.

What was it like starting out as a comedian in a music-based town like Nashville?

I learned real quick it’s not polite or recommended to make fun of karaoke singers.  In fact, they take it very seriously.  It was interesting because a lot of the stages – first the only comedy club in town was Zanie’s.  I certainly got a lot of stage time there. But a lot of the other stages around the area doubled as music stages.  More than half the audience is there to see the show that’s going on whether it’s karaoke night or music open mic, or whatever – some cover band’s coming on.  But it was very difficult to cut my teeth in that element: not just me, but other comics as well.  It definitely provided a platform.  There was definitely no shortage of stages or microphones in Nashville.  Sometimes we had to go against the grain, but it was interesting and challenging.  If you could make those people laugh, who were watching the show that are there just to listen to music then you know you did something right.  So it kind of gave us a little extra incentive to do it.

What was it like facing your first non-southern audience when you started to tour outside of Nashville?

My humor was never southern centric.  I did have a little bit of an accent.  It was never about a southern style of comedy.  It was just about being a smartass and being an every day guy laughing at life and looking at things at a different angle.  That’s stuff that everybody can relate to no matter where you are.  And once I started to get out of the south and branch out and work the road I realized that.  You know what?  This isn’t just a southern thing.  This is stuff everybody gets touched on.  It’s what I like to call the inner-dork.  Which is when I make fun of myself.  I’ve got dorky qualities but it’s stuff we can all relate to.  We all have those things that we’re all not proud of but can relate to, yet we can laugh at whether it be your sports team or alma mater.  That’s just one of the things that, yeah we wish we could be better, but we’re not. So you have to laugh and enjoy life.  That is something everybody from Montana to Arizona to Florida, we can all take part in that.  So I wasn’t shocked when I first got out of the south.  I realized it was some pretty universal stuff I was talking about. 

I was wondering how the crowds were, if they were more brutal or more forgiving up north.

It varies.  There’s certainly a lot of crowds that are more welcoming than others.  I know a lot of southern crowds can be a little harsh towards northern comedians because a lot of people automatically assume that somebody from the north is going to make fun of them. The south seems to be a big target for a lot of comics around the country.  But coming from the south and branching out I didn’t really experience that. It was more of a welcoming atmosphere.

What is a day at the office like for you?  Do you have to sit down and do a lot of research because a lot of your humor is topical?

A lot of the jokes that I write for the networks are topical - Weekend Update and Jimmy Fallon.  The stuff in my act, there is some topical stuff there, social commentary type things, but most of it is about life, whether it be family or what it was like when I used to work in an office, what m friends are like now, technology.   So it’s an all-encompassing view of life – not necessarily a topical joke that’s going to have a short shelf life, something that’s going to funny for this week or a year from now.  But it’s constantly changing and constantly having and influx of that stuff.  When I say topical in terms of my standup, it’s stuff like social commentary, like whether it be a technology craze or a food craze or a TV show that’s still going to be in people’s minds down the road as opposed to a joke about Obama or healthcare that will be old in a month.  Tiger Woods for example.

As a comedy writer, how much do you analyze others jokes.  Do you think about ways it could be funnier if they said something a little different – you know like an editor?

All the time.  It’s nothing critical.

No, analyzing.

Yeah.  I listen and think I would have done this or I would have done that.  Then,, depending on who’s doing the joke, whether it be Fallon or Seth Meyers, they’ve got their own voice.  So how you would do it doesn’t necessarily equate to what they think is good.  So they kind of change it up a little bit or change the punch line altogether.  It’s kind of futile to sit there and analyze that wouldn’t factor in all that.  I never answered your question about a normal workday for me.  It does involve getting up early and reading the paper and drinking coffee and meeting my deadline.  I have an 11am deadline for Fallon every day.

What kind of pressure do you have writing for Fallon?  Do they tell you something like they need three jokes by 11am or a set number of materials you have to pen.  I’m guessing there’s a number of you guys involved in the process.

It’s actually not a lot of pressure at all.  It’s a lot of fun.  They give you setups.  We get pages and pages of setups.  We submit eight from there, so you have to kind of pick your battles and pick which material, not that you have a good punch line for but what is Jimmy going to do.  He runs the gamut from political stuff to crazy stories.  Sometimes you have to know what he’s going to do, like past monologues.   There’s no pressure at all.  They give you so much to choose from.  It’s no pressure at all.  Turn out eight jokes and make them good and that’s it.  You move onto the next thing.  And thank Go there are people like Tiger Woods in the news.

Is comedy writing like music where you’re looking for the next trend or topic to write jokes about?  Or are we going to be hearing Tiger Woods jokes for quite sometime?  I guess the Woods situation was kind of an early Christmas gift for comedy writers.

I can’t tell.  Because he made his decision to leave golf for a while, it may fall off the radar.  You never know with pop culture.  It’s not my call.  I’ve got a couple of great punch lines where I will reference Mark Sanford from South Carolina.  Okay, that’s old news.  They’re not going to do that joke on TV because it’s an old story.  Half the audience may not remember who Mark Sanford is.  I don’t know. Either Tiger’s going to stick around or he’s going to fade away.  As long as it’s in the news…

As heated as politics have been the last couple of years in America is it difficult to write political humor?  It seems like people don’t have the same sense of humor they did in the past.

Yeah, it’s getting so polarized.  I wasn’t writing jokes 20 or 30 years ago but I know what you’re saying.  I certainly feel like it’s a little bit more sensitive.  But for the most part those people have a sense of humor.  As long as politicians are out there doing stupid things – not from an ethical standpoint but from a political standpoint people are going to laugh.  That’s what we do.  We laugh at our leaders and that’s what makes this country great.

You’re a young man.  Who are some of the comics you looked up to?

My favorite comics are not well known.  They should be because they’re hilarious.  People like Greg Giraldo, Kathleen Madigan, Jake Johannsen.  They’re just so clever and so broad-based they can make anybody laugh no matter what background the person was or what part of the country.  They could make everybody laugh and that’s what I want to achieve.  As far as the old school guys I liked a lot of Bob Newhart stuff, Bill Cosby, Richard Pryor.  I don’t necessarily share their style.

What brought out this comedy gene in you?  You’re obviously into sports in school.

I was a dork.  In high school I was a dork.  I was making people laugh.  I was into sports but I wasn’t necessarily any good at it.  I realized I could make people laugh.  That’s what kind of got me rolling.  The thing that really hit me, I guess was when I co-hosted the talent show in high school.  I did a couple of bits between acts and that’s kind of what did it for me - being creative and making people laugh. That was when I was 18.  It was pretty spotty after that getting on stage.  It wasn’t till I was about 25 when I started getting serious about getting on stage.

I was watching a YouTube video of you where you were attacked by a bat.

Yeah. (laughs)

Was that real?

That was real.  And I get that question a lot.

What were you talking about when the bat attacked?

That’s why people thought and still think it wasn’t real because I was doing Halloween jokes.  It was in November of ’05 I think, or ’06 in Macon, Georgia.  It was literally after I did two Halloween jokes.  And the joke was about Alfred Hitchcock and the movie “The Birds” about how birds attack people and circle away.  And as soon as I struck a pose to act out the joke is when the bat flew out the first time.  And that’s why people thought it was part of the joke.  People thought that was part of the show.  And it wouldn’t go away.  It kept dive-bombing my head.  I kept trying to tell them this wasn’t part of the act.  And it was an all-ages show with kids in the crowd. I wasn’t supposed to curse.  I’m a clean comic any way, but when there’s a bat dive-bombing at your head one instinct is to let out a four-letter word.  I thought it was pretty remarkable that I was able to bite my tongue and retain my composure while dodging rabies at the same time.

A lot of comics use standup as a stepping-stone to sketch comedy and onto television and movies.  What are your goals?

A very tangible goal is I would love to anchor “Weekend Update” one day.  I don’t do impressions, I don’t do characters, so I don’t see myself as a regular cast member.  But I would love to anchor it.  Other than that, just doing standup.  It’s just so much fun being creative.  Traveling around, I get to see the country.  I get to see the world.  There’s nothing like it – sharing your creation, your creativity, your imagination.  I don’t know of another way to describe it.  Just a lot of fun.

When Fallon’s on are you like an expectant father waiting to see the reaction to your material?

If I’m not working, if I’m home at 12:30, yeah, it’s kind of exciting.  I actually have a friend of mine in Washington and we were watching the monologue and he went into a setup.  I told him if said if he [Jimmy Fallon] says Paul Abdul, that’s my punch line.  He said “Paula Abdul”.  That was kind of cool.  You just witnessed the birth of a child.  That was back when I was first starting.  Now it’s sort of a regular thing.  It’s neat. It’s really fun just to be a part of that environment. 

But I guess there’s nothing like the instant gratification of performing live and getting that reaction first-hand.

Absolutely.  I’m not that sensitive, but it’s neat.  It’s a rush.  Doing standup is a rush.  There’s nothing like it.  That’s why comics are the way we are.  There’s a lot of stuff you have to go through when you start off.  There’s a lot of stuff you have to wade through and hurdle over.  That’s why we keep doing it and love it so much.  If we didn’t love what we did we wouldn’t keep doing it.  There’s nothing like it.

 - Dave Weinthal

Keith Alberstadt performs at the Comedy Catch Thursday – Sunday.  For tickets and more info go to thecomedycatch.com.

It’s tough being one of the smartest men in the world while being one of the funniest. 

That’s the issue legendary comedian Gallagher has run into over the years.  Since his debut over 30 years ago on shows like Merv Griffin and Mike Douglass, Gallagher has entertained million of people during his career.  A pioneer in the cable television, he was one of the first to win the coveted ACE Award for his comedy specials.

His name is also been synonymous with a device called the Sledge-O-Matic as many watermelons and other items meet their fate on stage as he slams the offending produce with a rather large sledgehammer.

Besides making many laugh few know the other side of the comic’s personality – his business acumen.  For the most part Gallagher is a one-man show.  Still to this day he books his shows, handles to business and travel arrangements as he performs over 100 shows annually.

An entrepreneur at heart there is more to Gallagher than crashing a watermelon stand.  He currently has a number of projects in the works and is working diligently to get people to help him.  One of these projects includes a family reunion based hotel that is strategically setup to cater large gatherings.

Earlier this week Gallagher was in Las Vegas meeting to pitch his slot machine software to a slot machine convention. The patented is a new field for the software in slot machines.  “Imagine Gallagher’s three watermelons come down to the pay line.  They either bounce, crack in half or crack in many pieces.  You’re a winner if all three match.  So what I’ve changed is video doesn’t show three wheels anymore.”

The machine shows a real picture with three things that do the same thing.  The pay line is part of the picture. Consider the pay line an electric line and three crows fly down.  They’re either electrocuted or they lay an egg or shot by a hunter and have a hole in them.  Or perhaps three vines with monkeys that go down the vines.  They can go past the pay line and jump back up, so you never know if you’re a loser or a winner until it absolutely stops.  “I feel this is a new way of entertaining people with the slot machines instead of winning a bonus area and going to an entertaining video segment, you’re entertained in the game part.  My point here is kids that are playing highly produced video games.  They’re going to be bored to death when they see the stupid condition  of video in slot machines.  And they better get hip, because here come the kids.”

Yet another project for the comic is  C.LA.W.:  “The Cosmic League of Animal Wrestlers”. “They’re intergalactic wrestlers,” the comic says.  “They’re animal wrestlers.  On their off time they help the kids.  That’s what we need in wrestling is a positive image instead the rules of wrestling are you’re allowed to hit people with furniture and if the referee isn’t looking you can do anything you want,” he continues.  “That’s not a really good thing to teach kids – how to put your brother’s head between your legs, fall to the floor and break their neck.”

There are four wrestling animals that wrestle by night and try to educate about the environment not only of earth but other planets by day.  “They attack and pick up like bounty hunters, the polluters.  And I need a different cartoonists to make the four animals,” says Galagher.

Through  “The Cosmic League of Animal Wrestlers”  Gallagher has figured out how inhabitants are going to look like if they don’t fix the environment.  “We see them on other planets.  One of them is a planet that’s had a huge ozone hole and so their bodies evolve to make up for it by having umbrella heads.  Their heads got really broad so their bodies stood in the shadow and they weren’t injured by the subatomic particles, infrared and ultraviolet rays,” he says.

With Thanksgiving just around the corner Gallagher doesn’t know if people are thankful as in years past. “They’ve got an assassin movie coming out at Thanksgiving – a guy with a big sword that’s been raised to kill,” he says.   “That’s funny to me.”

Another project the comic is working on is a new cable special, which he finalized the plans for recently.  “I’m going to make a special in high-def high speed.  We’ll have a high-speed camera which will slow down so they can see the splashing better.”

Interest in paranormal activity, or ghosts and the extraterrestrial have been around since the beginning of time.  There are those that believe in spirits and that there is something beyond the mortal life.  There are others that have used this belief for financial gain whether to sell newspapers, books, movies, TV shows or websites.  Discerning who is legitimate and who is not can be a literal crapshoot.  Over the past couple of years interest in paranormal activity has grown at record pace.  There are now a number of television shows that deal with investigating paranormal activity.  Chattanooga alone has a number of paranormal groups.  One such group is Oni Ryushi, a four-person team that goes on location investigating, looking for paranormal activity.  We recently spoke with team leader Tommy Hiranaka about his experiences in Chattanooga.

How long have you lived in the Chattanooga area?

I’ve been here since ’84. 

Where did your interest in paranormal come?

I’ve been interested since I was a kid.  When you’re a teenager you go to haunted houses to see who has the bigger balls.  In the past ten years my interest in it has greatly increased.  I’ve had close friends, one die of a suicide, one that was shot in the face at Highland Plaza when it was a bar.  I’ve gotten a little more interested in what happens after you die. 

Is your paranormal belief in extraterrestrial or in ghost apparitions?

It’s mostly all ghosts.  I don’t deal with the UFOs or aliens.  Paranormal is considered everything from ghost hunting to basically Big Foot.  A lot of us branch off into certain specialties.  My team is what you would consider what everybody commonly refers to as ghost hunters.

It seems in the last couple of years that ghost hunting or interest in paranormal activity has come to the mainstream and blossomed in popularity.  How would you explain the sure in popularity in the paranormal?

What basic man wants to know – what happened to man after we die.  Reports of ghosts go all the way back to Roman times.  A Lady in White would be a very good account of that.

How long has your team been together?

My team has been together about a year.

How did you go about assembling your team?

To be honest with you I got friends that are near and dear, and people that I was associated with for a while that had some interest in it and would actually take it seriously – not to go out there and get drunk.  My team is strictly no drug, no booze.  I’m very strict on those rules. 

There seems to be a number of paranormal teams roaming Chattanooga.  A lot of it seems more for show or entertainment value than the actual pursuit of paranormal activity.  Hat is your opinion of my assumption?

There are a few I don’t know well.  There’s one bigger group I know.  I tried to get in contact with him to do a joint investigation.  He was more concerned with doing some Cons in this town.  I’m meaning the Chattacons and events like that – merchandising, basically.  That kind of concerns me.  My team is a non-profit organization.  There is a team in the southeast area called GHOSTS, which I think they’ve been working close with Chattanooga Times Free Press and they seem to be a legitimate team that’s going after the truth.

Do you feel the sudden popularity and trendiness of ghost hunting actually hurts what you do, or does it help you out?

It mostly hurts.  A lot of people are afraid to either admit that they believe in ghosts or seen ghosts.  They’re afraid to be ridiculed even with the popularity.  I’ve had people I worked with make fun of it.  I’ve let them listen to some of the recordings that I picked up in numerous different places.  You can tell it shook them up a bit.  I think it also kind of helps.  People are getting a little more open and kind of helping me get cases.  It’s about 50/50 to be honest with you.

How do you scout for locations?

A lot of them are word of mouth.  I do a lot of research online.  I’ve had everyone from someone that has come into my day job tell me about a location.  We’ll go out there and check it out.  There are actually quite a few websites that provide locations, a lot of places that suggest since ghost hunting has gone into the mainstream that is a haunted location.  A lot of bed and breakfasts up north will do that.  A lot of it is me doing research online and confer with the team to get their feedback whether to pursue the location. 

Where do you do the majority of your ghost hunting?  Is it the stereotypical graveyard or house considered haunted?  Where are places you hunt for ghosts?

It again comes back to word of mouth.  I’ll have somebody come up to me.  I’ve given out quite a number of business cards.  They’ll tell me about a location that there was an experience there or they feel uneasy there, or they’ve heard stories – everything from shadow people to hearing voices to things being moved around that they can’t explain.  We start taking it into real consideration and decide if we go there. 

When you go on location.  What does the team bring with them and what activity takes place?

I run a four-man team.  We break up into two pairs.  We’ll run everything from visual audio recorders to IR (infrared) camcorders, which is we’re walking around in an actual business or house we’ll set up our cameras where there’s a lot of activity from what the owner has seen or told us.  It depends.  If we do a cemetery for instance, we don’t really set up cameras at different angles.  We’ll go up there with camcorders.  We’ll take K2 meters and EMF detectors.  K2 and EMF detectors pick up electromagnetic fields.  My tech manager has a tri-field meter which picks up radio waves, EMS and I believe magnetic, I believe.  It’s a Geiger counter. Geiger is another measurement. 

In the times your team have been out have you experienced any paranormal activity?

I actually have.  There’s a cemetery that I’m not going to name, but you hear about the arches with a black mass.  I saw a full body apparition by one of the trees.  Corpsewood Manor, that is probably one of the most hostile entities we ever approached.  Audio sounds, visuals – it was all there.  It’s what an investigator loves to find. 

Are all ghosts angry ghosts?

No.  Most of them are disembodied spirits.  Usually in tragic deaths they usually don’t know they crossed over.  There are two major kinds of hauntings.  There’s the intelligent, which are the ones that are interacting with you.  If you’re asking questions whether they know they’re dead, they can interact with you.  There’s something called residual haunting.  Basically it’s the same function.  Somebody’s walking down the hall for instance at the same time every day or it’s on a set schedule.  It’s like a broken record.  It can’t be helped.  It’s an imprint – no more, no less than that. 

A lot of places look for paranormal activity is where a tragic event took place or the ruins of a mental hospital.  Wouldn’t that prejudice your beliefs because you automatically assume paranormal activity there?  Or for that matter might you imagine something there when there’s not because you expect to find something?

There’s actually something called matrixing.  When you catch something out of the corner of your eye, you think it might be a shadow, the best things I can possibly say about the evidence you get is there are a lot of amateur groups out there or people that are curious that go out by themselves.  Make sure you actually see it, not like you’re looking out of the corner of your eye.  When you catch something on audio make sure you clean it up.  There are different audio programs you can use.  One is called Cool Edit, which will let you change the decibels of the background or white noise that will prevent you from hearing audio.  Make sure it’s not one of your investigators or anybody that’s with you voice.  Make sure they don’t match up.  There’s a lot of rechecking to make sure it’s not something that’s unexplainable.  We even check each other’s evidence to make sure there’s no interference – make sure noting is there.  If everybody on the whole team can dissect it, it helps to be more likely real evidence.  A lot of people say what they see on photos are orbs and it’s usually dust – light reflecting off the dust. 

What exactly is an orb?

It’s not a ghost like most people think.  It’s a ball of energy.  Spirits are supposedly a way for them to manifest are nothing but energy.  They think the more orb activity there’s a spirit there trying to manifest.  A lot of people see dust molecules and think they’re actually orbs.  If it’s see-through it’s not an orb.  If it looks like it’s in motion it’s more likely a real orb.  If you’re taking still shots with a digital camera or a camera with film.  We use infrared lenses.  We don’t use a flash when we take pictures so we don’t get any kind of reflection.

Do you believe in being able to contact the dead using a séance?

I believe there are mediums out there.  I have been trying for a year now to find someone that is sensitive or what would be considered a medium or someone that can contact the dead in this town.  I haven’t had any real luck.  Much like a lot of people think that we’re doing was a hoax, there are also a lot of people out there that want to make a profit off of it, and that goes from your psychics all the way down to investigators.  It’s a long process of weeding out those that are actually legitimate.

What are you doing with the data that you’re collecting?

Research it.  There’s actually a pretty big database online.  There are actually different teams.  One that’s a good one is TAPs.  That’s the most popular one and anybody reading this will recognize, is from Ghost Hunters off of Sci-Fi.  They’ve got TAPs forums, which you can chat online.  Anytime we get a picture we let them dissect it and see what they think.  I’d rather have a general consensus before saying something is evidence.  To be honest with you, my team, we’re going out there and trying to find what really does happen because it’s one of those life answers that are never been answered and you’ll never know until you cross over.

Your studies and your reading and research of paranormal activity, how does Chattanooga compare to other places you’ve researched?

We’re not high, high up there.  We’re not New Orleans or Savannah, but this town is rich with history.  There is a lot of tragedy that has happened here – not to mention this town has been around quite a while.  I think this town honestly a lot more activity than your normal town would.  I’ve heard everything from apparitions, which we’re still in the process of getting permission to access Chickamauga Battlefield all the way out to Parkway Billiards.  These buildings were part of lower Chattanooga before the great flood here over 100 years ago. I honestly think there’s a decent amount of activity here and I won’t be bore with Chattanooga for a long time.

 - Dave Weinthal

Fall is in the air and the calendar read October.  That means only one thing to many – Halloween.  That’s right, that one night of the year kids big and tall dress up in costume all in a quest for a treat.  No treat, then be prepared to be the butt of a trick.  Comedian Henry Cho has great memories of Halloween past.

“When out trick-or-treating did you have a way of sizing up the houses in the neighborhood as to where to go for the best swag,” says Cho.   “We used to hitch hike (this was in the late 60s, early 70s) to the best neighborhoods and the rich folks gave out whole candy bars, regular size not the minis,” he recalls.

“My mom always asked where I got them, we all had the same story and told all of our parents we got them from the other side of our neighborhood.  My dad would have killed me if he knew I hitched a ride.”

There’s one neighbor Cho will always remember from his childhood Halloween days – Mr. Brock.  “I'll always remember Mr. Brock, he was the apple guy,” he recalls.   “We always went to him last, thinking maybe this is the year he would do something different but he was consistent, apples... green apples and he'd put them in with a little force just to smash my Milk Duds.”

Cho’s favorite costume growing up was that of Batman – not the Dark Knight of today but the Adam West Batman from the TV sow.  “Droopy ears and no body armor,” he recalls.  “It was saggy and didn’t fit well, but I was Batman for the night.”

His worst costume growing up was when his dad dressed him as a raisin.  “Just a dark garbage bag – nice…” Cho says.

As he’s gotten older and now has children Cho’s perspective on Halloween has changed.  “When ii was a kid, the thing you had to watch out for was razor blades in apples,” he says.  “But no one ate them anyway.”

Nowadays Cho doesn’t take his eyes off his kids.  “There’s no telling who’s out there walking around and they’re in disguise,” he says.  “Halloween used to be about going and getting candy and hanging with your pals.  Now it’s about staying safe… sad.”

The Halloween tradition the comic missed the most is the egging f houses.  “We were good,” he recalls.    The worst thing he recalls doing was getting a full bag of garbage and filling it halfway with water.  “Eight kids would carry it and lean it on the front door.  We’d ring and run off,” he says.

The owner would open the door and spill inside.  “As a kid it was hilarious, as an adult I know how bad it was,” says Cho.

As an adult Cho’s favorite costume was when he dressed as a Mowgli from the Jungle Book.  “Good thing it was warm and I was in my 30s, so I was in surfer shape.”

One of the costumes that he witnessed that should have been left home was a few years back when a lady had a Catwoman costume on.  “I didn’t realize they made them that large,” Cho says.  “”She scared all the kids… and some of adults too.”

Some things about Halloween never change – like the neighborhood “apple guy”. “The first time I took my oldest son trick or treating he was about three. Dressed like Spider-Man, he had a sack full of candy when he walked up a long walkway to the front door of a really nice house. I was thinking....maybe even full size candy bars...the motherlode,” Cho recalls.  “When he came back with a bunch of other kids he was just staring down in his bag. He said, ‘I got an apple, what do I do with an apple?’”

“I told him... ‘You throw it right back at the house! That's the apple guy, don't ever be the apple guy,’” Cho told his son.  “I was kinda kidding, but then all of a sudden about five of the kids chucked their apples at the house. My son was only three so his just smashed on the walkway but a couple of the bigger kids hit the porch.”

Everyone took off running including the adults.  “We were laughing for about a block. Then we all came to our senses and went back and clean up the apple guy's house,” Cho says.   “I apologized and told him how it went down, he said he'd always given candy every year but his new girlfriend was a health nut and made him become the ‘Apple Guy’.

“He said he didn't even get mad when he saw the kids throw them, said he'd done the same thing when he was little. That's what you're supposed to do to the 'Apple Guy". We hung out and told Halloween stories after that,” Cho recalls.

One story Cho recalls telling was when he was single and was supposed be at a party but his girlfriend was taken ill so they stayed home. “I didn't buy candy ‘cause I shouldn't have needed it. I started giving out quarters,” he remembers.

 “The word must have spread cause I had tons of kids showing up. I didn't have anymore change so I started emptying the pantry,” Cho recalls.  “Pop-tarts, cookies, anything I could find. Finally, I started just tossing in ice cubes and after that round of ice I killed the lights and we sat silent in the dark for about another hour faking no one was home,” he says.  “Here we were, grownups scared of little kids dressed up like Teletubbies, afraid to make any noise or movement in my own house.”

 - Dave Weinthal

Henry Cho will be performing Friday and Saturday night at the Comedy Catch.  For reservations and more information go to thecomedycatch.com.

For the better part of 40 years countless Chattanoogans and visitors have passed by the oddly shaped wedge building located just to the right of the Chattanooga Choo Choo.  Many of those people thought to themselves what they would like to do with this building if they ever got possession of it.  Much like the building, which houses the Pickle Barrel downtown, it was one of the most speculated pieces of property in the city.

Stories circulated about who owned the property and their intentions.  And up until a few years ago, nothing was done about the building other than wish or speculate.

Then a few years back the building was sold to the city after a demolition hearing.  The building was designated a historic landmark and was saved from being razed.  Joe Sliger and Eastman Construction obtained the property and thanks to him and three entrepreneurs the old Terminal Hotel will see new life come January 9 as the Terminal BrewHouse.

The BrewHouse has been an ongoing project and goal for Matt Lewis, Ryan Chilcoat and Geoff Tarr.  The three have been working on the project for the better part of three years, and collectively involved with Hair of the Dog a downtown restaurant and bar.

The history of the building is a little sketchy, but according to records was built in 1909 next to the Railroad Terminal, now known as the Chattanooga Choo Choo.  It opened as the Terminal Hotel and was a popular hotel in the day when riding the rails was king in the country.  The building is a three-story uniquely styled structure as it is shaped like a piece of cake.  A number of businesses called it home before it was out of circulation in the early ‘70s.  There are some reports stating it was used as housing as late as 1998 before the structure was deemed inappropriate for public use.

There are still some questions on the building’s history that or that parcel of land that remain unanswered.  A name of the building appears the name Stong.  The building has been referred to by some as the Stong Building.  Checking city records there was a Stong Brothers Pharmacy located around the corner on Main Street.  But this was during an era when Market Street did not officially extend that far.  Market Street ended around Main Street.  Past Main Street it was called Montgomery Avenue.

A structure similar to the Terminal Hotel was located almost in the same location at the corner of Montgomery and Main Street.  The South Chattanooga Savings Bank building was opened there in 1889 and remained there for two years before relocating to the northeast corner of the intersection in 1892.  Later the bank changed its name to Hamilton Trust and Savings Bank in 1903 before being purchased by Hamilton National Bank (later First Tennessee).

But there is nothing clear as to whether the structure are related or if Stong refers to A.A. Stong of the pharmacy of Stong Architecture, a regional architectural firm.

The three looked at the historical property as an opportunity to put what they hope will be a cornerstone in the revitalization and regrowth of the southside and more specifically Main Street.

Chilcoat attended city meetings when the fate of the building was being discussed.  When Sliger and Eastman Construction obtained the property it was good fortune for the three.  Sliger was responsible for the work done on the location of hair of the Dog.  Sliger’s company literally cut that building in half, preserving a majority of it when Fourth Street was widened.  Prior to that project the Hair of the Dog location was home of the oldest bicycle shop and after the building was redesigned it was a coffee shop briefly before becoming a pub.

The three approached Sliger with their concept of converting the old hotel into a brewpub.  Chilcoat said he actually drew up the preliminary conceptual ideas on the back of a napkin.  Sliger actually ended up using those drawings when designing the stabilization plans for the building.  Over the course of the next six to eight months the three negotiated a build out and lease.  With help from the Lyndhurst Foundation and Cornerstones financing and other matters were taken care of for the project.

Despite the success of Hair of the Dog, the three talked about opening something up on the southside.  “We’re excited about it,” says Chilcoat.  “We wanted to be on this side of town because we are all fond of it, so we looked at doing different things, but a brewpub wouldn’t fit in the places that we saw,” he continued.  “We got to do it all at the same time and didn’t have to compromise on the concept or what we wanted to do.  We got all of it together.”

The layout of the building is three stories and a basement according to Lewis.  The basement is where the actual brewery will be along with the serving tanks.  The entry level will feature a bar, restaurant seating, and the main restrooms.  The second level is mainly dining with a twist.  You will be able to go outside on the second level where there is a green roof.  There is a totally walkable green space.  “Which is one of the coolest things in Chattanooga in my opinion,” he says.  “It’s like walking through a backyard.”  60 percent of the area is grass while the other 40 percent is comprised of a wooden deck.  The third level is about half the size of the other two for dining but has an enviable view.  On one side is a view of the city and the other a view of Lookout Mountain.

When the Terminal BrewHouse opens on January 9, Lewis says first and foremost they want to capture a true brewpub feel.  “And to us, what that means to us is first of all, establishing a neighborhood restaurant/neighborhood bar kind of thing feeling,” he says.  Capturing the food side of the business is also very important he adds. “It’s just taking a brewpub neighborhood kind of atmosphere and combining it with a real, true casual dining feel,” 

Lewis adds that a lot went into devising a menu that would be very approachable price-wise.  “A lot of people think the southside is a very unapproachable area price-point-wise,” he says.  “We tried really hard to stick to a real approachable price-point.”

The menu will consist of a lot of vegetarian items.  “We’re doing as much green as we possibly can on the menu,” Lewis says.  He says they plan on using local meat and produce as much as possible on the menu.

The brewery, which takes up most of the basement space, has the capacity of producing six beers at one time.  “What our thought process is that we’re going to capitalize on styles that we know are successful styles and then see what happens,” says Lewis.  The three plan on getting feedback from patrons as to what would like to see in a craft beer.  The brewpub will have most likely three styles available at all times while they’ll have other brews that will change out seasonally.  “We’ll experiment with different flavors and hopefully keep getting better and better with it,” he says.

While the three are known for their involvement with Hair of the Dog and its success, the two places are completely different.  “The real distinction that we want to make is that the Terminal BrewHouse is a craft brewery,” says Lewis.  “It’s still going to have that same neighborhood pub kind of feel, but we want to make sure that it’s not 21 and up.”  The brewpub will be a family-friendly establishment that will be a non-smoking environment, where at Hair o the Dog they cannot establish that kind of atmosphere.  “We also want to make sure people understand the amount of energy and effort we put into the food side of it,” he continues.  While Hair of the Dog has developed a perception of being a bar at the Terminal BrewHouse the goal is for people to understand it is a restaurant.

“Aside from the fact there’s common ownership, and some of the people that worked there will work here, none of the food is going to be the same,” says Chilcoat.  The food’s going to be different, as well as the beer we brew here is not going to be available at Hair of the Dog.

“The philosophy that we want to be the kind of place that is approachable from every demographic,” says Lewis.  “Anyone that enjoys going out to eat or going to have a beer will enjoy.”

“Another commonality is –and this goes for both places, we want to be the hangout for the area,” says Tarr.  “We like the idea of being the neighborhood hangout.  We want that to happen here.”

 - Dave Weinthal

HENRY CHO

Henry Cho is a rare bred in standup comedy these days.  He’s a good guy.  His humor is derived from his upbringing, a Korean-American born and reared in Knoxville, TN.  His storytelling humor is reminiscent of the likes of Bill Cosby and Bob Newhart.  His clean humor has even crowned him “Mr. Clean”. Cho, who recently hit the road with country stars Amy Grant and Vince Gill, hosted NBC's "Friday Night Videos" and performed several times on "The Tonight Show."  His credits also include the films "Say It Isn't So" and "McHale's Navy."   He has sealed a deal with ABC and Touchstone to star in a sitcom based on his own life.  Henry recently took a short break to discuss his good fortune with us.

What led you to a life of laughter?

Luck and blessings got me to where I am today, doing stand up for a living. I was in college, my sixth year, and my pal asked me what I really wanted to do. I told him acting and thought I'd try comedy as a venue rather than starve in New York or something like that., knowing Steve Martin and Billy Crystal had gone that route. Luckily, Showtime was doing a 'Funniest Person in America' contest and the local comedy club, Funny Bone, in Knoxville had a night. I called and signed up but they already had 12 so I was first alternate. Someone bailed and I got the call on Friday that I was on the show on Monday. I'd never hung out in a comedy club and when I told my pals what I was doing their first words were, "but you're not funny". I said I know but I think I can do this. I went there that Monday night, thinking the others were like me...first timers, but I was wrong. Most were working comedians and after seeing the first four (I was on fifth) I told my pals that I was going up and try not to make us all look bad and I'd never do it again. I killed, got a standing ovation. Got hired on the spot to work that week, started on Wednesday, dropped out of college on Friday. Been doing it ever since.

Growing up in the late 60s and early 70s there were a number of outlets and venues for expression out there to help form your personality and humor compared to comics like Bob Newhart and Bill Cosby. What sort of influences did you have around you that affected your perspective that you bring to comedy?

I'm a storyteller, mainly cause on the way to the comedy club that first time my pals were in my truck saying...if you're gonna do this, tell the story about this, about that, so that's what I did and how I still do it. I listened to Cosby and Newhart albums growing up and they are the best storytellers and I think that is why I chose that style.

I know you’ve probably been asked a million times about it, but I going to anyway. You grew up in Knoxville TN, and still call Tennessee home. What was it like being of Korean descent growing up in the south during the era of the ‘60s and early ‘70s. Did you encounter stuff that since you were Korean everyone you figured you must know so and so because they were Korean also?

I was born and raised in Knoxville. We were the only Asians back then, so no one really knew any others to think we were friends or relatives. In my act I talk about it being tough, playing Army, the neighborhood against me. Cowboys and Indians…I was always the cook. But those are jokes. I was never treated any differently. I wasn't the Korean guy, I was just a guy.

Attending college in Knoxville where to state and city live and breath college football. What were your experiences like? Did that help/add to your comic personality?

College was a blast. Had great fun camping out for tickets to the big games, going to away games and scraping all the money I had to scalp a ticket. I still love SEC football, but I'm not a crazed fan like some of my pals. I enjoy it but my world doesn't revolve around what a 19-year-old boy does on a Saturday in the fall.

What are some of the bigger changes you’ve witnessed in the south since growing up?

Good thing is some things haven't changed in the south, that's what makes our region so great and original. The biggest changes would be the diversity. I was the only minority from kindergarten till high school. There was one other Asian girl and three or four African-Americans. Now there are a lot more minorities throughout the south. Cities have gotten bigger by far, I remember going to Atlanta as a kid and there was one tall building downtown. You can rent Burt Reynolds' "Sharky's Machine' and he's walking with the skyline in the background...one building. Fifteen years later there are a ton.

What were you doing when the World’s Fair came to Knoxville back in Â’82? The World’s Fair seems to be a lost cause these days, gone the way of the analog TV.

I think Knoxville's World's Fair was the last one to finish in the black, by like 19 dollars. It was a great time to be on campus at UT, fireworks every night, we'd go on the roof on our apartment building and watch with our girlfriends, cheap date. Pals worked at the fair also so it was always good to go and get free food and such when you're a starving student.

Speaking of digital and analog, a lot of entertainment talent feared digital imagery a little because of vanity that their picture would be too clear. What is your take on vanity in the entertainment business?

Vanity goes with the territory I guess. When actors and actresses require special lighting so they'll look good, pretty crazy. Some even get special lenses so they look thinner. I've been blessed with good genes. I don't wear makeup a lot of times when I do TV, try to do the Clint Eastwood thing I guess. I'm 47 and I know I don't look it, I'm Korean....that's like 28 white boy.

One of your film credits is Revenge of the Nerds III: The Next Generation. What was it like being a nerd?

Well, we were the cool nerds...ha. In #3 we ruled the campus. It was a great film to be a part of and I had a lot of fun. I still keep in touch with some of the cast. The coolest thing was the role was originally written to be a fat Asian slob guy with a samurai sword. I wasn't gonna do that so the director gave me a couple days to come up with another character. I walked in as an Elvis freak and they loved it. So my role was rewritten and they let me adlib a lot of stuff. Sometimes the script wouldn't even have lines for my character, I just got to riff and that was a ton of fun.

What do you think with the explosion of media in today’s world with the internet/social networking and such? While it gets you to people faster, does its properties tend to rush you into things because people have such ready access to stuff?

The new media is a plus in many ways especially as far as promotions and such. Having websites (choindustries.com, chobusiness.com myspace.com/henrycho) is a great way for folks to keep up with things and schedules. On the down side, I've done as how before and come home and had a link sent to me as someone had a cell phone or other recording device and they put it on YouTube and it's on there now and I had no say in it...and no compensation. But at least folks think enough to put it out there so again, it becomes a plus.

What do you think has been the greatest invention to come around since you’ve been born?

I was gonna say the internet but it is really to me the remote control. I grew up having to change channels...for my dad...and using pliers after the knob broke off. Now I just have to keep my boys from taking the batteries out of the remote and putting them in their toys.

You signed a deal in ‘07 to begin working on a sitcom based I guess loosely on you (a Korean family living in the south). How is that coming?

Craig Ferguson (Late Late Show) is my executive producer, he's a big deal to have involved with my project. The writer's strike set us back, we're still hoping to get this thing done. It's not really about a Korean family, it's about my family now, my wife is Caucasian and my kids are half. I'm the only Asian actor although my dad will be a character soon enough if we get on the air.

Going from standup to situational comedy can be tricky for a number of comedians with mixed results all up and down the board. Have you studied dome of the successes (Seinfeld, Drew Carey) and weigh then against some of the failures (Pauley Shore, George Carlin) to gauge what you want to do with the show?

Jerry Seinfeld is an old pal, he told me the hardest thing to do is become a comedian. Then after years of developing this character on live stages…networks then try to make this character a bus driver or something. It's hard to find the right vehicle for a comedian, that's why in all my pilot deals I've written my character with a job that let's him be at home a lot...hardly even see the guy at his job.

If you weren’t in comedy, what do you think you’d be doing?

Probably in advertising. Before I dropped out of college I was on my fifth major and loved advertising. I would write funny ads and when I told my professor I was gonna drop out he said he'd never tell a student to quit his education....but you need to go do this...you are really funny.

 - Dave Weinthal

Whether you know him best as the former host of E! Television's Talk Soup, the boyish Michael on Showtime's Queer as Folk, or as the bubble-wrap wearing cult leader desperately seeking the "continuum transfunctioner" in Dude, Where's My Car, comic actor Hal Sparks has been cracking up film and television viewers since his feature debut in the 1989 cult classic Chopper Chicks in Zombietown.  Hal took time from his busy schedule to chat with us for a few minutes recently.

Belated birthday wishes.  I understand you celebrated another birthday Thursday

True!

Did you do anything special to celebrate your birthday?

Well, actually I treat my birthday like New Year’s.  I do all my New Year’s resolutions, and my plans and goal-setting for the year.  So I have by most people’s standards a boring version of a birthday, but to me it’s more functional and ends up having a lasting effect.

The older you get do you find yourself celebrating your birthday more differently that when you were, say 20?

No, not really.  And I don’t know if that speaks to the fact that I always took it very seriously, or I take it less seriously now.  It’s hard to balance that I suppose.  I was born on my mom’s birthday, and so I’ve always kind of shared that with her.  It’s kind of a different experience when you’re aware every birthday that your mom gave birth to you on that day.  She did all the work and all you did was show up.  There’s kind of an element of respect for the day that you get, which is nice.  That’s how I look at it.

You’re kind of a 21st century renaissance man – comedian, serious actor, and a musician.  First of all how did you get interested in comedy?

Well, I don’t know I was always funny, but I certainly had a head start according to my mom and my family.  We grew up without a lot of financial means, and so you make your own entertainment in those times.  Being funny sure helps a lot.  In that, I really developed the tools that later became my career.  You just find out at a certain point, like I moved to Chicago and I realized people treat comedy like a real job – like an actual living.  As opposed to most of us kind of look at it like a magical thing that people have talent.  It just sort of happens.  “Oh, some people are born that way.”  Then you move to Chicago and you realize there are schools and training facilities, and theaters that people work at for years, if not decades to hone their craft.  This is kind of a serious business.  Luckily the timing worked out when I moved to Chicago right about the time I was considering comedy as something I could maybe do in light of the fact that I wasn’t qualified to do anything else. (laughs) And so that really was it.  I started in standup when I was 15-years-old.

How where those first crowds when you started doing standup?

They were fine.  I had a rather adult sense of humor – always had, and that’s largely thanks to my mom, my dad and my Aunt Susan, and people like that who I always grown up around, grown up around funny things.  It wasn’t like my jokes were children’s jokes when I first started on stage. I was kind of already ahead in that department.  At Second City they always taught you t assume your audience is always more intelligent than you are, which in my case is difficult. (laughs) Nonetheless, it’s important.  It raises your standards.

Ho did you learn the most from at Second City or from being in the business in general?

My two biggest influences are definitely George Carlin and Steve Martin.  Carlin, for his treatment of standup as a long-term career, as a professional choice – as a mission, even.  And then Steve Martin for his abstractness and his goofiness, lack of fear being perceived as an idiot, even though you know he’s not.  I think that’s something that gets lost in a lot of comedy, is that people are, especially now afraid of not looking cool.  I think those two things fused together – those two guys in their alternating styles really made a huge difference in me.  And of course I love old Richard Pryor stuff and Jonathan Winters, and stuff from the ‘60s.  You learn a lot. 

What was it like playing second fiddle to Ashton Kutcher in “Dude Where’s My Car?”?

Actually Seann William Scott was second fiddle to him.  I was a featured cameo, thank you very much. (laughs) It was fun.  It was a good time.  Everybody on that film was relatively friendly and easy to work with.  Here’s the thing: People will come at you with this sort of assumption that “Aren’t you a little embarrassed to be in ‘Dude, Where’s My Car?’?  If you were embarrassed at something like that you would have left when you read the title,  It was always called “Dude, Where’s My Car?”.  It wasn’t like, “Ooh, ‘Silkwood II’ This is going to be great Oscar-contending role. (laughs) It was always called “Dude, Where’s My Car?”.  It’s sort of ridiculous to assume that a.) I should be ashamed of it; b.) I’m ashamed of anything I’ve ever done.  That’s another thing people have a hard time understanding.  I fear no man in regards to what I do in my career and my choices as a comedian.  If I can’t afford to be a jackass, who can? (laughs) And it’s a lot of fun making movies and doing these kinds of things.  It’s a great time.  It’s silly, but fun.  I’ve done my fair share of serious acting work and I’ve sort of physically and emotionally paid the price for it and how difficult that work is to do.  Quite frankly I’m much happier and comfortable doing stuff that makes everybody laugh.  And that whole think about are you worried that people are laughing at you and not with you – I don’t care. 

As long as they’re laughing.

Yeah.  The “why” is not really important.  The “why” is something my ego is on the line, that somehow I think that other people’s opinion of me matters. (laughs) That’s the only way you can be ashamed about anything.

Tell me a little bit about the band you’ve got going, Zero 1.

We’re a three-piece metal band.  I’ve been writing songs for a long time.  I grew up in a very musical family. It was just something you do.  It was understood that I being the son would have a birchier guitar.  So I’ve been at it a long time.  Most people if they know you from TV or they know you from acting, they’re not aware of that, so it seems like something new.  Our sound is sort of a fusion between Ozzy and Alice In Chains, Skid Row and KISS – all my influences.  And I’m proud of it.  I really like the music I’ve made.  I’m writing the second record now, so it’s good times.

You spend a lot of time on the road obviously, plus you’ve done television such as “Queer As Folk” for five seasons, “Talk Soup” plus movies.  Which do you enjoy more, the aspect of being on the road or do you like being situated in a certain area.

They each have their own benefits.  They really do.  There’s something great about being in the road and seeing people individually and meeting them face-to-face and watching them enjoy what you do without any question.  That’s pretty terrific.  Then you know you’re doing a good job. On a movie set or a TV set you have an idea.  You can use your past history and your experience, but for the most part you don’t really know until later what the expression is going to be from the audience.  So the live thing is great, but I’m not one of those people who go live theater is the real thing.  That’s BS, too.  Quite frankly, uninterrupted art is the best way.  If a painter had to stand there with somebody behind them the while time going, “I think blue would be better.” (laughs) You’d never get a good painting done.  I think there’s something to that acting in a one-camera situation that’s helpful.  The nice thing about standup I have the freedom to be myself no matter what.  Nobody’s putting words in my mouth.  It’s my opinion, which is a very free thing.

Do you find a certain part of the country you enjoy seeing more than others?

No.  There are some hotspots that are really fun like Chicago and San Francisco, Seattle, Tampa.  There are some places where you can go like Washington D.C. that the audiences are really smart and engaged.  But sometime the challenge is fun, too.  Sometimes it’s better working with somebody or an audience that isn’t hip and isn’t as on it. 

I understand you can speak Chinese.

Yes.

What went into learning the language?

I studied Kung Fu for a long time – 20 years now.  I’d always been culturally fascinated by it.  My instructor at one point had wanted me to go to China and study with his contemporaries for a while.  Where my instructor speaks perfect English and Chinese, but the people he wanted me to study with didn’t speak any.  So I started learning a little bit thinking that maybe I’d go with a translator.  Then I started to pick it up.  It wasn’t as hard as I thought it was.  As a matter of fact, after I get finished talking with you I go work with my tutor. So I continue to study.

After you get through with this tour what do you look forward to doing for the rest of the year?

I voice the cartoon “Tak and the Power of Juju” on Nickelodeon.  Then a “Tak” video game comes out.  I just got through with that.  It comes out in November.  I just did a cameo in the new Mike Judge film. “Extract”.  I’m not sure when that comes out.  In the spring I would guess.  I’m also writing and developing stuff on my own.  The nice thing is I’m starting to split time where I don’t have to be on the road 100 percent of the time is that I can start developing projects.

 - Dave Weinthal

I have lived one of the most surreal lives.  I was once asked what I did for a living.  My honest answer was  I do for a living what most people spend a lot of their hard-earned money on.  I get to go to concerts, big-time sporting events, hang out and rub elbows with some small and big time stars from all walks of life, be it sports, music, politics, stage or otherwise.  I lived sort of a charmed life I guess some say.  The hours can be unbearably long like tonight, but realistically I haven’t paid to attend a major concert or professional sporting event in over 15 years, minus a rash last second road trip.  And sometimes I even get to meet those in the business I admire or never thought in my life I would ever carry on a conversation.  A couple of years ago I got to hang out with Peter Tork of the Monkees, a childhood idol.  That experience sort of burst my bubble of high expectation, as he wasn’t as cordial as I thought he might be. (I couldn’t blame him, after all he was forced by his publicist into talking with me at 1am at a small blues club outside of Atlanta – a far cry from the days of the Monkees).  And at other times you are pleasantly surprised.

In 2006 famous stand up comic Gallagher came to town.  I can remember as a small kid watching him when he broke on the scene in the mid to late Seventies as he performed on afternoon talk shows like Merv Griffin and Mike Douglass.  More often than not he was on roller skates with long, hippie looking hair and a cap.  He would end his routine by taking off the cap showcasing a bald head and saying,” Never let your mother comb your hair when she’s mad at your dad.”

From there he went to greater fame on cable television.  In fact, he was one of the pioneers of cable TV winning some of the first ACE Awards (cable’s Emmy at the time) for his comedy specials.  From there his fame grew and grew.

I remember when I was in college he came to town playing the Tivoli Theatre. I wanted to go, but I was a poor college student and could never afford a ticket whenever he would come to town.

Later in the eighties and the 1990s he became even more famous not really for his words but for his sledgehammer and his smashing of watermelons with it.  The Sledge-O-Matic became synonymous with Gallagher.  Theatres would put plastic sheets up for the front rows to take cover as the comic crushed melons and then an assortment of other items with his special tool.

Not playing Chattanooga for many years Gallagher was booked to play the Comedy Catch.  The advertisements stated they non-Sledge-O-Matic shows.  I jumped at the chance to finally see this comedy icon from my youth.

Not knowing what to expect, I was pleasantly surprised.  I laughed out loud for the first time in many a year.  I had forgotten over time that Gallagher was a true comedian and actually told jokes.  And it is not easy to be funny either.

Granted, there are a lot of people out there who think they are funny or their friends think they are funny, but it takes more than saying something stupid or cussing inappropriately to me a comic.  And I know of more than one comic who would disagree with me on the subject.  But that’s okay.  At least their friends think they are funny.

Part of being funny is being an observer.  Not only observing, you’ve got to analyze the situation.  Even a prop comedian is an observer to a degree.  They may get a laugh off their odd invention, but devising this contraption takes observation, thought and innovation.  And the best standup comics do that.  And Gallagher is one of the best.

After the show was over and the cordial meet and greet was over with fans, I left to go home.  I was in the parking lot of the club carrying on a conversation with a friend who came to the show with me when my newest surreal experience took place.

Gallagher comes out of the club and walks to his car that happens to be parked next to mine.  On his windshield are two cards.  He walks over to my friend and I and says, “Not bad for an old guy, huh?  Two phone numbers.”  He joins in our conversation that happens to be about music.  He asks us what we do and we tell him.

“Was I supposed to do an interview with you?” he asked.

“Yes”, I answered.  I was unable to get him on the phone for a scheduled interview..

“I guess I screwed up, didn’t I?’

I wasn’t about to say so.  This was Gallagher, someone I had seen on TV for the better part of 30 years.

During his show he was telling the audience about a hotel concept he was working on for an inn to be a Family Reunion Hotel.  He gave the audience full details on the hotel and how it would work.  He even solicited the audience if they had any ideas on how the floor plan should be laid out to sketch something for him and pass it to him at the end of the show. I wasn’t sure if this was part of a comedy routine or legitimate.  He said he was trying to meet with former mayor and commercial real estate baron Jon Kinsey about his concept and was getting the brush-off.

While standing in the parking lot I asked him and he said it was a legitimate plan he had and something he wanted to pursue.  I told him I knew a few people with money (I really do), and I would make a couple of calls for him if he’d like.

“What’s your cell phone number?” he asked.

We exchanged numbers.  I made a couple of calls and sent out a few emails, one of which was to Frank Burke, the owner of the Chattanooga Lookouts.  To my surprise I go an email from Mr. Burke who said he’d love to meet Gallagher.  He gave me his top secret cell phone number to give to Gallagher and said he was free most all of Saturday to meet.

Gingerly I called Gallagher on his cell number.  Upon answering I explained to him that I got a bite and Frank Burke, the owner of the Chattanooga Lookouts expressed interest in meeting.  I gave him Mr. Burke’s phone number and wished him well. 

At this point I put on my workout clothes and headed to the gym to workout.  I was on the treadmill working up a sweat when my cell phone rang.  On my caller ID popped up “Gallagher”.  I answered.  He proceeded to tell me that “Frank Burke character” agreed to meet with him to discuss this family reunion hotel plan he had.

I congratulated him and wished him well with the meeting.  I then asked if he knew how to get to the ballpark from his hotel.  He said he could see the ballpark from his suite window.  I again wished him luck.

“What are you doing now?” he asked.

Nothing I said, as I walked the treadmill.

“Pick me up in 30 minutes in front of my hotel,” he said.  He told me where he was staying. I jumped off the treadmill, drove home and put on street clothes.  As I pulled in front of the hotel, there stood Gallagher.  Who would have thought almost 30 years after seeing him on TV as a kid do his routine that I was going to be driving Gallagher around.  We made our way to the ballpark to meet with Frank Burke, his family and a number of the Lookouts staff, who were curious to see who this guy was I was escorting around town. 

We entered through the gift shop.  Upon entering Gallagher spotted the souvenir bats of varying sizes – from the size of a ballpoint pen to a regulation size.  He held the various sizes out in his hands and said he used them in his act a long ago.  Holding them spread out from biggest to small in an arrangement he asked Mr. Burke and those in the gift shop if they knew what it was.  “A bat mobile,” he answered to the delight of those in the shop. 

For the next two hours the comic entertained the group in the boardroom while getting feedback and talking dollars and cents with the Burke family.  Between hardball business talk he broke up the monotony by singing the National Anthem in Spanish, doing so, he said because of the great number of Spanish speaking ball players that played professional baseball nowadays.

After the meeting Gallagher had me drive him around town to look at vacant properties.  We drove to the Chattanoogan Hotel.  He wanted to see this big hotel that Kinsey had something to do with.  I waited in the car as he looked around the grounds and the buildings for roughly 15 minutes.  Tourists started to stare a little.  He then jumped in my car and said, “Let’s go before people start recognizing me.”

My surreal day wasn’t over. For being such a good sport Gallagher offered to take me to lunch.  He wanted to check out the options around Jack’s Alley downtown where he went the previous morning after arriving in town.  We drove around and I let him have final choice. He chose Q’doba.  We went inside the restaurant.  Inside the average age pf the people inside was about 20-25.  They looked at the two elder statesmen that walked in (the two of us).  I was dressed in khakis and a polo shirt and Gallagher in a suit and a large necktie with his patented long hair.  The young people stared at us as we went through the line and ordered, before sitting down to eat.  They weren’t sure who he was but they had that look on their face that he had to be someone famous.

We ate without incident and talked real estate during lunch.  After lunch I drove Gallagher back to his hotel and he invited me to come by the club during the rest of his stay in town.  I took him up and came to his last show.  I thanked him for a definitely interesting weekend.  We exchanged pleasantries and he was gone later that evening towards his next destination.  He said he was headed home for a few days to hang out with his kids.

Fast forward to now.  Gallagher is booked to play a two-night engagement at the Comedy Catch.  I figure maybe I’ll have better luck landing an advance interview with the comic genius.  After all, we hung out for an entire afternoon.  Being a realist I figured he meets thousands of people a year.  I called his office and they set up the interview. Jackpot!  I wondered if he was still working on his Family Reunion Project.  His assistant sends me literature on some of his new business ventures.  I’m reading this stuff over and am not only impressed by a little intimidated by his business acumen.  I’ve never really interview a conic with such business sense.  To be honest, I conduct over 100 interviews a year over the phone or on location with different  celebrity types of varying degrees and most don’t speak in complete sentences.  I’m not dealing with a run of the mill joker here.

Gingerly I call Gallagher’s number.  He answers. I can’t tell his mood by his tone of voice.  I introduce myself and tell him of our venture the last time he came to Chattanooga. “Of course I know who you are,” he pipes up.  “How could I forget you?”

I was one of the two things he remembered about Chattanooga.  That is me and  a blonde with large breasts who worked at a technical plant. “That was those two girls that worked at the technical plant,,” he said.  “I was really impressed by them.  I never met a chick with big tits that knew more about physics than I did.”

I asked about the hotel.  He said he went on Howard Stern recently and discussed it.  “Some people responded good to it,” he said.

So far the idea has gotten positive feedback, but no one has taken the ball and run with it.  Gallagher pitched the idea he said to architects in Nashville while they were building the new stadium.  “They seemed to like it but there was noting they could do to change anything.”  He looked at buildings downtown around music row as well.

“I think the young corporations should building for their people and then give it away on the weekends,” said Gallagher.  The comic/entrepreneur also checked out Louisville, and Raleigh, NC.  “I found an architect there within a few blocks who liked the idea but I wasn’t there long enough to pull it all together.”

The setup of the hotel suites was one with a central meeting room.  Instead of everyone having individual bathrooms there would be two – one for the boys to share and one for the girls.    The girl’s bathroom would have makeup mirrors and a place to hang gowns.  “In case you wanted to use it for a wedding,” he said.  “Then I had a big bed for grandmother to read bedtime stories and with a fence around it so kids wouldn’t fall out.”

“People call all the time and say they agree with me,” said Gallagher about his hotel for family reunions.  “They love the idea.”  Everyone from lawyers to developers and real estate agents claim to like the idea.  “They’re not willing to do anything, but they love the idea.”

A firm believer in his idea, Gallagher has patented it.  Also patented is a new field for the software in slot machines.  “Imagine Gallagher’s three watermelons come down to the pay line.  They either bounce, crack in half or crack in many pieces.  You’re a winner if all three match.  So what I’ve changed is video doesn’t show three wheels anymore.”

The machine shows a real picture with three things that do the same thing.  The pay line is part of the picture. Consider the pay line an electric line and three crows fly down.  They’re either electrocuted or they lay an egg or shot by a hunter and have a hole in them.  Or perhaps three vines with monkeys that go down the vines.  They can go past the pay line and jump back up, so you never know if you’re a loser or a winner until it absolutely stops.  “I feel this is a new way of entertaining people with the slot machines instead of winning a bonus area and going to an entertaining video segment, you’re entertained in the game part.  My point here is kids that are playing highly produced video games.  They’re going to be bored to death when they see the stupid condition  of video in slot machines.  And they better get hip, because here come the kids.”

Another one of Gallagher’s many projects is a dance pyramid website and smashyourface.com.  Smashyourface.com is kind of like a social network for hate – maybe the anti-MySpace.  The site reminds the visitor that the site is no way related in any way shape or form to MySpace the popular social networking site.  “Smashmyface.com where you mutilate kid’s faces, and girls can put gum in their hair,” Gallagher says.

When asked where he came up with the idea, Gallagher simply answered, “Hatred”.

“I’ve always been in the hatred business.  People get off on me smashing stuff.  It was a relief,” he continues. “A watermelon is like a person. It has red on the inside.  I’ve got a website.  You can go and look at it.  I’ve got a beta up.  It’s called smashmyface and you can mummify a person’s face and bugs will come out the ear and go in the nose. And then it gets wrapped in mummy tape.”

Gallagher is actively looking for someone to assist in writing computer code for the site as well as for another site he is developing, DancePyramid.com. “My website DancePyramid.com I’m putting together right now,” he says  On this site people are supposed to videotape themselves  doing their best dance steps, about an eight to ten second clip.  “Those little clips are in a square and those squares are piled in a pyramid.  You work your way to the top of the pyramid.”

Another one of Gallagher’s projects is Uncle Earth.,  The comic who blazed the trail on cable TV during its infancy is doing the same with Uncle Earth.  “Now I’m finding the same freedom and lack of adults in charge over at the internet.  They can’t stop you.  It’s freedom of expression.  It’s freedom of speech.  Is that not a great picture with me as the earth?  Isn’t that awesome?”

What exactly is Uncle Earth?  “I’m just doing a better job than Al Gore is communicating these facts about degenerating environment so that the young people get it.  And it’s fun, too,” Gallagher says.

The Uncle Earth segments are short skits with the comic’s head made to look like the planet earth.  He has  a volcano for a nose, which spews smoke.  Uncle Earth informs the viewer about taking care of the environment in short three-minute segments. Anyone with a short attention span won’t get bored because it’s very concise. “Do it quick, get it done.  Show it to somebody else.  If you want more of them” he says.  “There are 20 of them.  Gorilla Ugly Films, this is another company I have.  When you buy them, they are 49¢.  The money goes to Greenpeace.  I wanted a way of raising some money and awareness.  It’s my thing for Earth Day.”

“I’m also making up characters of electricity and a photon,” says Gallagher.  “I have Photie the Photon and Melectricity  with an M in front of electricity for Melectricity.  And I have a little hat, which has three towers on it with antennas.  I’m going to have lightning hit those.  My hair will be standing on end when I’m Melectricity.  I haven’t figured out the face and character – the costume and face for Photie the Photon.”  The comic wants people to know the difference between a gamma ray and a beta ray for when women have to make a decision whether they want a pap scan or a cat scan or whether or not the radiation that they’re receiving will cause cancer while looking for cancer.  “I was just at the consumer electronics show in Las Vegas, and executives in the field of electronics don’t know the difference between an electron and a photon.  I would ask them what is carrying the signal – the conversation to your cell phone, an electron or photon?  They all think electron.  They think they’re being hit by lightning.  It’s amazing how little we know about the devices that we’re using,” he says.

Yet another project for the comic is  “The Cosmic League of Animal Wrestlers”.  It’s another animated project and he says he’s like to speak with cartoonists in town or they can get in touch with him through Enigma to help him design the different “wrestlers”.  “And they’re going to have to save the earth and other planets that are being polluted,” he says.   There are four wrestling animals that wrestle by night and try to educate about the environment not only of earth but other planets by day.  “They attack and pick up like bounty hunters, the polluters.  And I need a different cartoonists to make the four animals.”

Through  “The Cosmic League of Animal Wrestlers”  Gallagher has figured out how inhabitants are going to look like if they don’t fix the environment.  “We see them on other planets.  One of them is a planet that’s had a huge ozone hole and so their bodies evolve to make up for it by having umbrella heads.  Their heads got really broad so their bodies stood in the shadow and they weren’t injured by the subatomic particles, infrared and ultraviolet rays.  So their heads get really broad,” he says.  “And then they have hair in their nose – really thick and their ears, because your ears are open to your lungs.  So you breathe through your nose and ears and it’s full of hair.  When you sneeze hair flies out sticking out about a foot long.  It’s funny.  So you look like Yosemite Sam.”

“I need cartoonists to help me to develop these ideas,” Gallagher says.  Claw is a bear, an Eagle, a Crab, and a Kangaroo that thinks he’s a Vela Erector, so he’s put a claw on one his big kangaroo feet.  “That’s the comic relief in this little thing.  I’m making a comic book, so it would be nice to meet some cartoonists to help render these and put them on my website, he says.  “I think the Internet is great way of working with people.  It’s like a big bulletin board that everyone can look at it.”

“I like working with a lot of different people all around the country.  Go on Craigslist and you can see my ad for a cartoonist in Los Angeles.  But I say you can be anywhere because you can be anywhere.  “

So how long has Gallagher been so environmentally conscious?  “When I was 26 in 1972 I was the editor of an environmental newspaper in West Virginia, and I wrote about the environment all the time,” he says.  “And I was quoted in National Observer, which was a national newspaper run by the same people that publish the Wall Street Journal,” he adds.  “To answer your question, I’ve always been concerned and I’ve always been aware.  I was a Boy Scout/Eagle Scout, so I learned the value of the forest and nature.”

With all of his business and educational projects we forget that Gallagher is still one of the funniest men around.  The comic was in New York during the recent sex scandal that toppled the state’s governor.  “You know [Bill] Clinton called the former governor of New York and said, ‘You were paying for it?  Don’t you have an intern program?’”

And when the talk rolled around to Hillary Clinton running for president: “Somebody said they didn’t want to be Hillary’s running mate.  And I said what’s the matter with being Hillary’s mate?  She’ll let you do anything you want to.  And why do they call it a ticket?  It doesn’t cost anything to vote – or does it?”

“To me, the black people should be mad about the Michelin man.  It’s obviously a guy that should be black. He’s supposed to represent tires, and he looks like he’s doing powdered donuts,” Gallagher quips.

Other observations: “We can’t call the TV the tube anymore since the flat screen.  And why do we have a dial tone when we don’t have a dial?    What makes Teflon stick to the pan?  If your knees bent the other way what would a chair look like?  Why does NetZero cost $9.95?”

“In Spanish the word ‘mall’ is bad,” Gallagher informs me.  “But in English it means you get new stuff, you meet your friends, you go to the movies.  That ain’t bad.”

“How about you can’t jump up and down?  You can only jump up.”

 - Dave Weinthal

The comic is serious when it comes to business.  If you are a computer code writer or a cartoonist he would love to meet you while in town.  Either stop by the show or send an email to info@enigmaonline.com and we’ll be sure he gets your information.

With the Chattanooga city mayor’s race less than a week away, Chattanooga will cast their votes Tuesday for whom they want to run this city for the next four years.  The airwaves and the newspapers have been filled with plenty of propaganda for the two perceived frontrunners, the incumbent Ron Littlefield and former city parks and recreation director Rob Healy.  But there are more than two men running for this important office.  Let Enigma, give you our dear reader, get a chance to know perennial candidate Thomas Smith II find out what he’s all about.

How many times have you run for mayor?

Four times.  I ran against (Jon) Kinsey, (Bob) Corker, and (Ron) Littlefield twice. 

Why do you want to be mayor?

Because the mayors I’ve seen over the years does not include everybody.  They don’t invite everybody to the table.  They just invite the rich and the people they understand, and I kind of figure if we keep this up our kids and grandkids won’t have a future here – and it’s sad.  It’s their life and they deserve a better life. What re we going to offer? 

Do you consider yourself a serious candidate for mayor?  Others may see your running as comic relief compared to the frontrunners.  Do you consider yourself a legitimate candidate?

I answer that question by saying I’m a man.  Everyday that God wakes me up I walk this earth like any other man.  And the thing about it, I thank the Lord for the intelligence to get up on stage with these guys and not sound like a comic relief or something like that.  I feel like I’m more serious than them.  If I were mayor I would turn this city around.  I would have a lot of people hating me.  They’d be rich people, so that would not hurt them.  I think I could bring a better overall presence to the city.  Right now I think this city is so evil, that it’s a hidden evil and you can’t see it. 

Where do you think the previous administrations have gone wrong as far as leading Chattanooga?

They don’t think about the man who has nothing – the common man who has nothing but to get up every day and go to work to try and feed his family.  And God said we would all prosper, but to me, the last three mayors – I don’t question their belief in God, I just question their belief in humanity.  I don’t think they understand that Chattanooga is like Iraq.  I mean we have kids that die in these streets.  I’ve been seeing them die for 12 years.  We graduate 2,000 kids from these schools every year and we have nowhere for half of them to go.  And we wonder why people end up homeless in the streets – because we’re creating it.  We’re creating criminals every day through this system that doesn’t care about humanity.

What do you think is the main problem with the school system as it is?

After we sold our kids out I realized that the county don’t really care.  When I say the county I talking about people that set on certain boards.  I realize they bring in these superintendents and these superintendents walk into a mess.  The thing about it is how can you put a dollar sign on a kid’s future?  They talk about the $20 million shortfall.  That was all right, but Ted Turner gave one school – McCallie $25 million.  That school is doing great.  I realize the rich people in this city and all the kids’ lives they could save – where are their hearts?  That bothers me.  Rich folks don’t have a heart, and they act like they don’t.  They say, “that’s not my problem, it’s their problem.”  It’s all of our problem.  These kids grow up to be adults.  This is where your crime is being created.  You’re not educating them and preparing them for this grownup world where it’s non-stop.

What does Chattanooga need most to grow as a city?  There are a lot of published articles about what a great place to live Chattanooga is, but what is the truth about Chattanooga?

 The foundation.  The foundation is the people.  I’ve heard mayors say, “I love this city”.  Do you love the people in the city?  You love the city, but you’re not from the city.  You just moved here like Corker – like Healy.  I love this city.  What about the people in this city?  That’s what makes a city – not the city itself, but the people.  The thing about it is the 30,000-45,000 – I’ll play with numbers – we’re talking about people living in poverty.  Real poverty.  And this has been going on for 12 years.  How do you wake up in the morning and look at yourself in the mirror and you’re the mayor?  And I told Littlefield that.  How do you look at yourself in the mirror and actually say, “I’ve been doing a good job”?  You’ve been doing nothing.  You’ve been doing what the rich folks want you to do.  And I think it’s time for that to stop. 

Would you say Chattanooga is a very class divided city?

Oh yeah.

More so than a racially divided city?

I think so.  I’ve got a lot of Caucasian people that work for me.  This two or three hour a day job is how they pay their light bill.  We’re talking about people who don’t make over $12,000 a year.  And they’re talking about the middle class being $50,000 and we’ve got to help the middle class.  No, we’ve got to help the people who really need help.  And that’s not happening.  And that’s not going to happen until a body of us comes forward – and it’s going to take a body.  When I say a body I mean it’s going to take four or five thousand people to walk down and say enough is enough.  And I kind of figure Channel 3 and everybody else is going to be there and they’re going to be like, “These people mean business.”  I’m not just talking about black folks; I’m talking poor white folks, Hispanics.  I’ve been running this race for 30 days and nobody has said anything about Hispanics.  Littlefield and Healy aren’t thinking about the Hispanics, nor the blacks or the poor.  They’re thinking about what’s going to get them in office.  And I understand that.

What do you bring to the table that the two frontrunners in the race don’t?

I feel like I would be like Moses.  I will part the red sea.  We’ve got a $42 million raining fund.  And I know it’s been raining in Chattanooga for years.  I could take $10 million of that $42 million, invest it into the inner city and make this city grow and within a year’s time it would make the rich not so scared of the poor.  We’ve got rich people walking downtown, but we’ve got poor people walking downtown.  They see somebody looking like a hobo - they’re scared.  Well, it’s time to eliminate this.  This guy doesn’t want to look like a hobo, but he doesn’t have a choice. 

What policies have you seen that the current mayor implement that you feel is off base or not brought to fruition, as they should be?

Look at this recycling thing they’re talking about.  We want to start this back up, but we can’t.  With the country leaning towards green, okay.  But you’ve got to start thinking outside that box.  We’ve been living inside this circle for years your way.  You’ve got to think outside it.  I realize you’ve got over 300 churches.  If I put in Caucasian churches, you got maybe 500 or more.  500-something churches in a city of this size hat move people like a district manager.  I’ve got a certain district.  I look at this map and we’ve got this whole city dissected.  I realize in my district we’ve got 200 churches.  200 churches that want to help, but at the same time nobody has organized them.  You’ve got preachers that worry about their church more than they worry about their whole community.  I want my church to be better than this church is.  Until we can get together and say, “Okay, we’ve got to come together”.  Just because you built your million-dollar church that doesn’t mean that church will be standing in five years.  It’s not in good faith that you’re running your church.  That’s the way the mayor has been running this city – not in good faith.

One of your campaign platforms I read about involved law enforcement wages.  What is your take on the current concept of law enforcement in Chattanooga?

That budget is $40 million.  I’m asking men to get out of bed every night to put their life on the line.  I cannot let pay affect the way they carry out their job.  That’s what’s happening in Chattanooga.  I realize that the police can ride around and you’ve given incentives where if you stop a car and somebody has a warrant out on them you get two days off. You’ve got police now that are targeting.  It doesn’t make a difference if there are four whites in the car or four blacks in the car.  He’s looking for two days off.  “Let me stop this car. Let me find a reason to stop this car.”  I’ve been stopped by the police so many times because of the job that I have.  I’m out there at four and five in the morning and they’re out there, “Why does he have his blinkers on?   Why is he on the wrong side of the street?”  I’m throwing the paper.  Once they see you throwing the paper out they’ll go around you.  Some police will get behind you because that’s just in them.  Whatever their intention - I realize it has changed over the years.  A lot of police stop me – used to stop me and I used to jump out of the car and throw my hands up because that’s how bad it was.  I don’t need you accidentally walking up to my car thinking I’m going to grab my driver’s license and you think I’m going to grab a gun and shoot me.  I’m trying to teach my sons if the police stop you keep your hands where they can see them.  They’re just as nervous as you.  It just depends on the time of the day.

A lot of people believe that during previous administrations there was too much self-interest involved – thinking of Kinsey and Corker specifically.  Do you still see that as an issue in the mayor’s office?

Yep.  I think these guys walk in their office, shut the door and they’ve got their plan on the table.  The plan only includes half of the city.  They’ve like, “We can’t feed all the hungry.”  Yes you can.  “We can’t give all the people who live in poverty jobs.”  Yes you can.  You’ve got 200,000 jobs in the city – 200,000 jobs in this city.  You’ve got 170,000 people.  70,000 of them are kids.  40,000 of them are living pretty good.  You’ve got 60,000 people and they’re living under the poverty level and half of them don’t have a job, yet you’ve got 200,000 jobs in the city.  That’s just letting me know you’re not educating these people where they can graduate and go to a trade school and do better with their lives.  That’s what life is all about.  You can’t take that money with you.  But the way a man thinks and the way these last mayors have thought here have been sad.  It’s really sad.  Like I said, and I hate to say it, that’s why I think they’re going to bust hell wide open – including Corker.  I know Corker is gone on about his business, but he could have turned this city around.  Kinsey came in with a business proposition.  I’m surprised Kinsey won.  That shocked me.  I thought Howard Roddy would have beaten him, but I think Howard Roddy was kind of scared.  Talking in front of people, when a man starts talking to people and he has to have a piece of paper in front of him to say what’s on his mind or heart, I realize that you’re not going to make it.  Corker could have changed this city, but Corker had a different agenda.  He could have cared less about Chattanooga, Tennessee, but yet we elected him.

Mayor Littlefield and Senator Corker have been patting themselves on the back for getting Volkswagen to come to town.  Do you think Chattanooga is ready for Volkswagen?  It’s a manufacturing facility that they’re building and there are no longer any trade or tech schools in the city to my knowledge any more.

No, I don’t think we’re ready for Volkswagen – if it comes in.  You’ve still got three years and they’ve found some things that weren’t done right.  At the same time I realize these people are spending all this money – they’re going to make this happen.  And it’s going to benefit Chattanooga as far as growth.  How much do you want to grow?  You’ve got to understand that we’ve got a population of 170,000.  In five years we may have a population of 200,000.  But you’re talking 200,000 people coming here from up north, down south, and they’re bringing crime and everything with them.  I look at this homeless shelter.  Already people are coming from Memphis because they heard about it.  Their buddies call them and say, “Yeah man, I’m going to move into this homeless shelter.”  It’s not a shelter.  It’s called something else.  Now you’re seeing more homeless people here because they’re waiting for opportunity.  I don’t think Littlefield knows what he’s got himself into.  He didn’t have an exit strategy.  If I’m going to open up a shelter, I’ve got to get these people a job, find them a place to live.  They can’t just stay in this homeless shelter.  But that’s how it works.  You stay in there for three days and you’re back out there on the street.  That’s how these shelters work and that’s sad.  That’s where I fault Littlefield.  He could create jobs.  They’re building so much downtown.  They don’t understand that all these vacant lots and abandoned houses could be turned into something.  But you’re just thinking inside this circle you’ve been living in the past 30 or 40 years and you’re not thinking about the big picture.  Until we can start thinking outside this box, we’re not going anywhere.

 - Dave Weinthal

Is that a sparkle in his eye or is he just confused? With his innocence and friendly demeanor Mitch quickly engages the audience and then catches them off guard with his mixture of mischievous dialog and off color comments. While laughing at observations only Mitch Fatel can get away with we are left wondering if he truly understands what he just said. We may never really know.  Mitch got started in comedy at a young age.  He interned with Howard Stern, did correspondent work for “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno” and has put out two well-received comedy CDs, “Miniskirts and Muffins” and “Super Retardo” as well as being voted number 6 in Comedy Central’s Comedy Stand-Up Showdown.  I recently caught up with Mitch who took a short break from his busy schedule.

So, are you looking forward to coming down south?

Yes. Actually I was thinking the other day that I’ve gotten to the point now where traveling has become my favorite thing.  When I first started out in this business traveling was actually the toughest part of it.  I’m out on the road now three weeks a month.  I actually realized the other day that I consider being the road more my home than being home.  I like going out and meeting fans now and selling CDs and talking to people and hearing how I affected their lives, what they think of the new jokes, and the old jokes.  It’s just a very, very cool thing to do.

Do you find yourself being kind of a tourist, taking a lot of pictures, collecting postcards, or getting a t-shirt from your destination?

No, actually I haven’t been taking a lot of pictures.  But what I have done is this: I have an opening act that travels with me. His name is Gary Cannon.  Gary’s my regular opening act for all my shows now.  He’s also become a friend of mine.  What we do now is in every town we go to, we ask the owner, we ask the fans that come and talk to us, what’s the one thing you’ve got to do here.  What’s the one thing you would do?  What they say to do, we make that our Sunday event and we go do that on Sunday.  We take pictures of that, and we’re building up a scrapbook of that.  For instance, we were just in St. Marco Island, Florida and they said, “Oh, you’ve got to go fishing for red snapper”, which we had never done.  We went fishing for red snapper.  It was one of the greatest times.  When we get to Chattanooga we’re going to find out what the “thing” is we’re supposed to do.  We’ll definitely do that.

What is the most unique or odd thing you’ve encountered visiting all these cities?

Believe it or not, it was in Las Vegas.  We asked, what’s something we’re supposed to do here?  They told us to go see the bodies exhibit.  I don’t know if you’ve heard of the bodies exhibit, but the bodies exhibit is just a bunch of people cut up in pieces.  They were dead.  They were definitely not alive.  Then they put them on exhibit, like all the bodies and stuff.  You get to look inside people’s bodies.  That’s kind of one of the weirder ones.  And then I’ve been to other places where they go, boy, there’s really nothing to do but go to the Hooter’s down the street and see Jenny.  And we’ve done that as well.  And that’s just as fun. 

I’ve noticed you’re a ladies man.  I’ve watched your act before.  You’re definitely the ladies man.

I’ve become a ladies man in the last couple of years.  I’ve definitely gotten to the point where more girls will let me see them naked than they’ve ever let me in their entire life.  And that makes me very, very happy.  I’ve actually had girls who get naked for me now who shouldn’t be getting naked for me.  I just don’t seem like I’m on their level.  And I’m looking at them and I’m like, “I really shouldn’t know what you look like naked.”  And they say, “You shouldn’t, but the world has been good to you.”  So the work has paid off.  I told my father the other day that I’m so glad I ignored his advice and went into show business.  He even admits now that he was wrong.  So, I think that life turned out pretty good.

Do you have a certain line or move to charm the ladies?

I make over $500,000 a year.

That’s a good start.

That’s the line I use.  No, actually to be totally honest with you, I’ve gotten totally to the point now where – and it’s really kind of a sweet place to get to, the women come to me.  They like funny guys.  Don’t ever mistake it.  They like funny guys.  The one thing that I have found, I am definitely not the guy girls are coming to have sex with.  They’re definitely coming to have sex with me and then they want to get married.  There’s a difference between my type of groupies and the kind of groupies rock stars get.  Rock stars get these groupies that come into their buses and take care of them.  I have groupies that want to take care of me, and nurture me, and cook spaghetti and meatballs for me – and they’ll also have sex with me.  So there’s a difference because every town I go to, I’m thinking I’m about to get married, because I fall in love very easily.  So, the next girl that’s nice to me I fall in love with her and then I tell her I’m marrying her, and it just keeps going on and on.  Then I have to run out of town.

So you must have a couple hundred fiancés running around somewhere going, “I’m engaged to Mitch.”

Yeah, it’s been a little bit of a problem with me falling in love with the ladies. It’s a pretty good problem to have.

It’s an occupational hazard I wouldn’t mind having myself.

I’ve got a couple of fathers after me, that’s all.

Yeah, you don’t need to be involved with a shotgun wedding.  And you need to be careful because you're coming down south.  They’re very fond of their shotguns.

I’ve learned to behave myself, and be a gentleman in the south. (laughs)

Well, you did get started in comedy awfully young.  You were what, about 15?

I actually got started in comedy much younger than that.  I started in comedy when I was about eight or nine years old.  I didn’t know I was a comedian at the time.  I just used to do shows for the kids on the block.  I used to read to all the kids.  I used to put on skits for people and charge them.

Kind of like Alfalfa on “Our Gang”?

Yeah, I guess a little bit like that.  And I just wanted to be a performer.  I didn’t necessarily know what being a performer meant, I just knew I liked making people laugh.  And I also knew from a very early age I liked girls.  I don’t know why.  Just early, early on was that I liked them and I liked to see them when they’re not dressed.  I started to figure out how to do that.  I started out when I was very young, immediately girls would talk to me if I made them laugh.  So, I definitely explored that avenue. 

Then when I was about 13 or 14 somebody gave me a copy of Steve Martin’s “Wild & Crazy”. And I listened to that.  And at that moment it all came together for me like an explosion.  Oh, that’s what I’m supposed to do!  It was amazing, because you learned – I’m reading his biography, and his biography he’s talking about the people that made him realize he wanted to be a stand-up comedian.  And then I thought, wow, it’s so funny.  If he made me realize I wanted to be a standup comedian, and now I’ve had people writing me, “Oh, I’ve seen your act and it makes me want to be a stand-up comedian.”  I love the different cycles of how everybody inspires everybody else.  And then the people that are your heroes become somebody else’s hero.  And you have to keep in mind when people write you, they look at me the way I look at Steve Martin. I never even met Steve Martin and I don’t want to meet him, because I’m so scared he won’t be the fantasy I dreamed he would be.  People will always say to me, “Oh, are you going to see the new Steve Martin movie?  Are you going to read Steve Martin’s book?”  After Steve Martin gave up standup comedy, I lost interest in him.  I've never seen maybe any of his movies – a couple.  The first one was “The Jerk”.  That was the best one.  And then he stopped being Steve Martin as I knew him.  I’m reading his biography now, and that was definitely planned.  You knew he was doing a character on stage, and he said he had enough.  He decided to become an actor.  And I respect him for that, but he’ll always be the wild and crazy Steve Martin guy to me.  I have no interest in him after that. 

Well. “Bofinger” was a pretty good movie, actually. 

I don’t know if I saw that.

He and Eddie Murphy were in it together.  It was actually one of his funnier movies of recent times.

I didn’t see it.  I’ve just got to tell you there was never a side of me that wanted to see Steve Martin as anything else than a stand-up comedian.  He says he gave up comedy because – and this is what I’m reading, that he was ready to move on.  I know the difference between him and me is I will never give up stand-up comedy.  It’s just to me the most beautiful, purest art form there is.  I just can’t imagine getting any kind of trip from anything other than this as much.  It’s thrilling every single time I get onstage.

I was on your MySpace page earlier.  I’ve gotten kind of addicted to MySpace lately…

We all have.

I noticed your favorite movie is “Rocky”. 

Yeah, Rocky is my favorite movie. I always get a lot of crap for that.  People give me a lot of shit for that movie.  They forget – or if you recall, the original “Rocky” was not a stupid movie.  It was actually a beautiful movie that inspired me when I was younger, and should continue to inspire anyone.  The story actually has depth, and beauty.  It’s just a gorgeous, gorgeous movie about I think somebody who knows he’s always capable of doing something but never ever felt that he tried.  Secretly I think everybody has a little bit of that in them.  I know that for a long time when I was waiting on tables when I was a better comedian than a majority of comedians working, and was just scared – just scared of trying the most, because that if I failed, I would know for a fact I wasn’t made to be a stand-up comic.  And Rocky makes this speech, “I never wanted to fight the champ, because if I fail, then I never was good enough. I liked living thinking I just hadn’t gotten the right opportunity.’  I think a lot of us have a little of that in.  And every time he makes that speech, I get really choked up.  It’s my life story.  I think that the reason why everybody responded so well to that movie, Sylvester Stallone wrote a deep, meaningful piece about the human psyche – and then became an idiot after that.  Or maybe he was a one-trick pony.   I don’t know.  I hate that “Rocky has become synonymous of a goody comic book character, which is basically what he turned “Rocky” into.

Did you see “Rocky Balboa”, the last installment?

No. I refuse to see it.

Actually it went back to the first “Rocky” standards.

People say that.  I have no interest.  I don’t think there should have ever been a sequel to “Rocky”,  “Rocky” was such a beautiful movie and was supposed to be left open like that.  I don’t know if Sylvester Stallone wanted fame or money – and that’s fine.  I just don’t think that that movie had to have a sequel.  I think that that movie was a beautiful, beautiful art piece and should have been left alone, quite honestly.

What is your opinion of sequels in general?

I usually don’t see them.  I’m trying to think if there’s a sequel I like other than “The Godfather”.  “The Godfather III ” was proof that sequels could really be horrible.  I don’t remember a sequel I loved.  I think about my favorite movie and I always thought the second movie usually let me down and depressed me.  So I’ve come to hate it.  I’ve come to accept sequels as things for the studios to make money.  Money’s fine.  I used to be against money when I was in my more idealistic days.  But now I actually have money, and I really enjoy it.  I definitely agree money is happiness.  On the same token I know I will turn down money for something that I think is an insult to my career or me.  I’m proud of myself on that.  I do take a lot of money sometimes for things that I don’t necessarily believe in.  I’ll perform at a birthday party because they’ll offer me so much money that it’s crazy to turn down, even though I don’t think standup comedy should be in that genre.  And I feel I can absolutely be bought for a certain amount.  I also know that I’ve turned down gigs where I felt that the comedy was not first.  Like for instance I’ve turned down some stuff where I’d be opening for a band, or where I’d be thrown to the wolves – that kind of thing.  I’ve turned down corporate gigs where I feel like my character would be abused.  And I feel like I should make a living out of stand-up comedy.  I always will.  There’s a limit to what I think you should take. I definitely know that if I made a movie I think was very special to me, I’d like to think that I’d have the courageousness to turn down the money.  I mean I think that one of the things you forget about money is you forget that you lived without it and you were happy.  I definitely spent a lot of my years poor trying to make it as a stand-up comic.  And although I am definitely happier with money, I definitely know if I need, I could always go back because I enjoyed my life.  I enjoyed becoming a stand-up comedian.

Do you see yourself being a stand-up comedian forever or do you want to branch out into movies or television? 

There have been a lot of cases where stand-ups have gone on to very successful television and film careers and others that we’ve seen tank as well.  I’m supposed to do that everybody says.  Everybody says, “You’re going to be a famous movie star.”  I’ll be a bad actor.  I’ll be honest with you I’m not the greatest actor.  I’m a great stand-up comic.  I’ve always been since I first started out.  The first time I walked out on stage I felt like I was meant to do that.  I feel like I will do television or movies when I feel generally inside that I was meant to do that.  I think that if that point comes I’ll go that direction.  Right now, I’ve got to tell you I love stand-up comedy.  I’ve been doing it since I was a kid now, and every new joke I write is just as exhilarating and satisfying as the first joke I wrote.  It’s a thrill to be on stage and have a new line or sentence come out of your mouth and see people double over.  And you think to yourself, “Wow, I have that now forever.  I have that joke forever.”  I don’t think I ever want to give up that feeling.  It’s one of the things in life that never ever dulls.  It’s as good as the first time.

You did some correspondence work for Jay Leno and “The Tonight Show”.  Did you ever find yourself in harm’s way during any of the situations they put you in?

I did.  I actually found myself in trouble with a baseball player – Vladimir Guerrero. I don’t know if you know who he is.  He’s a baseball player for the [Los Angeles] Angels.  It actually wasn’t him I had trouble with.  It was actually his agent.  The agent was also his translator.  And I had written a joke for a translator because I knew I was going to be at the All-Star Game, and a lot of people spoke Spanish and had translators.  The question I asked the translator was to ask Vladimir Guerrero how he felt about the fact his translator was gay.  Of course the big joke was going to be that the translator was going to have to say that to the baseball player.  The translator turned red and looked like he was turning into the big, red, Incredible Hulk.  He got really red and angry.  He had to be restrained. He was about to beat the shit out of me and had to be restrained.  And everybody else is like, “He got to be gay.  There’s no way anybody would ever react like that unless they were.”  He had us kicked out of the All-Star game.  He didn’t want us back. He apparently was powerful because Vladimir was a big star in the game and his agent was also his translator.  His agent said he would pull Vladimir out just because of what little Mitch had done.  It was pretty funny and exciting to be a part of somebody I got under their skin so much.  That I thought was so silly.  We were trying to explain to him, “We don’t know who you are.  We don’t know you’re gay.  It’s a joke.  It’s a 12-year old joke.”  And then of course we were saying we weren’t saying it was bad.  Why are you getting so upset?  That’s the closest I’ve come to death.  He was a very big man.  And Vladimir was getting upset because he didn’t know what was going on.  It was fun.

You also did an internship with Howard Stern.  What did you learn from your experience with Howard?

Howard was the guy who taught me that being yourself pays off in life.  I always wanted to be the cool guy in school.  I always wanted to be the football player.  I always wanted to be everything that I wasn’t.  And I wanted to be the cool guy.  And all of a sudden Howard taught me by watching him and observing, and him being so genuine and open with his life that ironically being the uncool guy he became the cool guy.  And it taught me that people embrace realness.  The reason why we hate politicians so much is because politicians say what we want to hear.  I think that’s why people despise them.  I think that people hate phoniness.  And whenever you can catch a phony, you take a certain joy in it.  And for a long time I tried to be the cool guy in school, and I wasn’t.  Others were much better at it than me.  I never was the cool guy.  I was the funny guy.  I tried to be the cool guy for the longest time.  And working with Howard I discovered embracing who you really are in fact is cool.  He taught me that you could become the cool guy by actually not being cool.  And so I embraced who I really was inside and stopped trying to fake who I was, and stopped trying to be a guy who knew how to talk to girls, and instead played up the fact I was nervous as hell around them.  And all of a sudden I decided to make that into my act, which I did.  It took off.  It goes to show if you’re true to yourself people will respect you, respect that, and I think basically flock to you.  People like truth in this world.

 - Dave Weinthal

First, just a little background. How did you end up in the baseball business and what brought you to Chattanooga originally?

My father loved baseball and took me to a lot of games when I was a young boy. When I was in graduate school he and I tried to keep a Triple A team in Old Orchard Beach, Maine. We had read in the newspaper that the team might be sold and was likely to be moved. We had attended many of their games together and tried to purchase the team and keep it in Maine but were unsuccessful. However, that effort got both of us interested in the business of baseball and we spent the next several years trying to purchase a team to bring to Portland, Maine. In the early 90’s my father, nearing retirement from his job as CEO of Capital Cities/ABC was successful in obtaining the brand new Double A Florida Marlins expansion franchise for Portland. In 1994 the Portland Sea Dogs were born and were a huge hit in that community. He and I liked the business and looked for another franchise with the understanding that I would live wherever that franchise was located. We looked at several different franchises and decided upon Chattanooga when I visited and fell in love with the city and the opportunity that I thought the Lookouts presented.

What kind of public relations battle did you have to fight when you announced publicly that for all intensive purposes Engel Stadium had to go and a new park had to be built to keep minor league baseball in Chattanooga?

Engel Stadium was perhaps the best stadium I have ever been in to watch a game. Unfortunately, it was impossible to operate profitably there because, by virtue of its age, the stadium required a tremendous amount of money to maintain. When we announced that we needed to move I heard a large number of negative comments about my decision. However, for me it was relatively simple given that I knew that if we didn’t do something we’d need to sell the franchise and it would definitely be moved to another city. Ultimately, the public relations battle was made easier by the fact that we build BellSouth Park/AT&T Field ourselves. At the time it was very unusual for a stadium to be funded privately and I am still proud that we did it that way. I think many people realized that if we were willing to spend that kind of money on a new stadium that maybe I was right about the difficulties operating in Engel Stadium presented us.

The park opened in the spring of 2000. How long was it in your plans to build the park or better put who soon after you took over operations of the team did you realize a new ballpark was needed?

We realized after our first season in Engel Stadium (1995) that we couldn’t keep up with the maintenance expenses and still make a profit. We knew as early as the fall of 1995 that we would need to figure out something in order to survive as a going concern in Chattanooga. I still consider our underestimation of the costs of maintaining the old stadium to be our biggest mistake when evaluating the purchase of the Lookouts. I was young and we were too new to the baseball business to realize how much we’d need to pour into the facility to keep it operating properly.

Other than age of the ballpark, etc. what were other factors that led to you deciding the need for a new stadium for the Lookouts?

The biggest factor, besides the maintenance associated with the age of the ballpark, was the space available (or lack thereof) for foodservice operations. There were only 12 points of sale at Engel and the math simply didn’t work as far as serving customers any time we had a crowd greater than 2000 in the ballpark. Major League Baseball had instituted facility standards in the early ‘90’s for Minor League Baseball and Engel was deficient in many of those as well which also contributed to the need for a new stadium. Those facility standards included lighting, locker room and media requirements and Engel Stadium did not meet those. The cost of bringing the old facility up to those standards was in the millions of dollars.

What factors led to the choice of “Hawk Hill”?

Our stadium in Portland is “downtown” and our experience there led us to become strong believers in the positives – both for the team and for the community – of downtown stadiums. My mother and father visited Chattanooga for Christmas in 1995 and my father and I drove past Hawk Hill. He asked me to take him up there after I told him I didn’t know what was going to become of the land that was there at the time. He paced off the empty space and came back to the car convinced a baseball stadium could be built there. When we came up with the plan in the summer of 1998 to finance the stadium privately my father told me he’d only participate if we could somehow build it on Hawk Hill. He felt very strongly that we build it “where the people go”.

What criteria did you use or look for when designing the park? Is there a basic floor plan all ballparks use or is that up to who you decide to do the work to come up with the basic layout?

Our President and General Manager in Portland, Charlie Eshbach, had served as President of the Double A Eastern League for many years and had seen many different ballparks in that role. He was instrumental in designing the stadium in Portland which quickly proved to be both popular and very fan friendly. When it came time to design the park here Charlie and I took the plans from Portland and used them as the first step to designing what became AT&T Field. We chose an architect that specializes in smaller ballparks and told them exactly what we wanted.

One thing I noticed about the park is that it had a comfortable feel almost as if there was some homage paid to Engle Stadium the way it was laid out.

One of the most important things we wanted when we built the new park was to make it as fan friendly as possible. Engel was such a great place to watch a game and we really hoped we could create the same type of experience in the new stadium. It is no accident that the players walk from the clubhouse to the dugouts past the fans. We wanted to make sure that the players and fans had as much chance to interact as possible.

If you can describe in a few words, what was the feeling like for the opening of the park when you had the exhibition game with the future Hall of Famers there such as Ripken, Griffey, etc there to compete and former President and Mrs. Bush there to throw out the first pitch.

The opening of the stadium was almost an out of body experience for me. We’d worked on the little things (painting foul lines etc.) until the wee hours of the morning and had returned very early to make sure we were ready to open so I was as tired as I could ever remember being. Prior to batting practice, B.J. Surhoff, who was then with the Orioles, asked me if I’d spend some time with Cal Ripken, Jr. who was about to build a stadium in Maryland. Fifteen minutes later I found myself under our new ballpark showing a future Hall of Fame player how our central beer and Coke delivery systems worked. I finally had to tell HIM that I had to get back to work. It was really a strange and wonderful experience. I also remember introducing former President and Mrs. Bush to The Famous Chicken who was in our front office when they arrived. He looked up at the former First Lady and the former leader of the free world and said, dressed in his chicken suit, “I guess you didn’t get the memo that it is casual Saturday”. It was a beautiful day and I remember being so happy that people seemed to enjoy themselves.

Who are some of the more memorable characters or personalities that have found themselves a guest at AT&T Field?

This is a hard question because there have been so many. On the field there have been a lot of memorable characters. Of course, the many future Major Leaguers that have come through have been great – Adam Dunn, Austin Kearns, Wily Mo Pena, Johnny Cueto and many more. Phillip Wellman was perhaps my favorite as his passion and intensity created so many memories. Though he is most remembered for his “Army crawl” tantrum, there were many other arguments that he had with umpires that were at least as good as that one. Off the field, people like Mike Eruzione, former President and Mrs. Bush, Paul Teutul, Sr. from American Chopper and Tommy Lasorda have all added to the experience of being here. However, most of the characters that I remember best are those who are just in attendance at the games. From people dancing wildly in the stands to someone ruining their clothing trying to retrieve a foul ball there are lots of silly memories.

What’s it like having the ballpark on the hill? Any advantages/disadvantages or obstacles you had to hurdle to make the park stand out in the community of accessible to the public?

The two most common questions I was asked when we were building the stadium and in the time since it opened were “How will I get up that hill?” and “Where will I park?”. The escalator and the cooperation of CARTA and other parking lot owners have helped ease those problems but they are legitimate concerns that we have to address each season. Our location necessitated the purchase of the trolley and the great friendship of the people at UNUM in letting us provide free parking in their lots has gone a long way toward helping ease those concerns among our fans. The cooperation of the City parking enforcement personnel in allowing us to valet park elderly and handicapped patrons’ cars has been invaluable as well.

The park seems to be a finalist or a winner on an annual basis for best minor league ballpark. That’s a remarkable feat. How difficult was it to find a dedicated team to keep up such a consistent quality?

Most people think that jobs in baseball are more glamorous than they truly are so there seems to be a large surplus of young people hoping to break into the business. It isn’t hard to find good people as a result but it is difficult for most teams to keep them. I have been fortunate in that I haven’t experienced a lot of turnover. I would like to think it is because I am so much fun to be around but I think it has more to do with the fact that people who come here end up loving Chattanooga.

2009 marks the tenth season on what is now called AT&T Field. What are a couple of your fondest memories at the ballpark?

The three exhibition games the Reds played here are near the top of the list for sure. The 2004 Southern League All Star Game is up there as well. Certainly, Used Car Night, any night we are at or near capacity rank high on the list as well. My top memories, oddly enough, are really the times I see families having a good time together at the park and knowing they didn’t have to spend a fortune to be together. When your job is to go to work at a baseball stadium it is difficult to find a truly bad memory. Even the time our groundskeeper at the time left the irrigation system on UNDER THE TARP overnight and caused a rainout when there was no rain is now a fond memory.

Some have nicknamed you the Modern Day Joe Engel, after the team’s most famous owner, present company excluded for your many promotions at the park. What are some of your more memorable hits and misses?

Joe Engel was, in my opinion, the best there has ever been so I am uncomfortable comparing myself to him. I think the camels at Engel, the character “General Admission” and our post-tantrum treatment of Phillip Wellman rank up there with my favorite promotions. Of course, things like Used Car Night, frequent fireworks etc. are ones I am proud of as well. My goal has always been to do what Joe Engel was so good at which was to try and put a smile on peoples’ faces without charging them too much for the entertainment. As far as misses are concerned, the infamous “Monkey Boy” and the midget Elvis impersonator didn’t have the impact I thought they might. Regardless, I don’t remember a promotion that we’ve done that didn’t at least make me smile. This year our “half mascot” will, I hope, continue the tradition of innovation.

Since becoming owner of the Lookouts you’ve seen the makeup of the business of baseball change. When you took over the Lookouts you didn’t really have the worldwide web or social networking, etc. How has modern technology affected the sport of baseball and the business of baseball?

Modern technology is something we, as an industry, were slow to embrace. However, the advent of print at home tickets and the ability to communicate quickly with our fans has changed our business more than any of us ever thought it would. Things like audio streaming, video streaming and instant access to our souvenir store are changing the way we interact with our customers. It really is a different world but it is exciting to try and take advantage of the things modern technology can provide. Of course, modern technology has also, in my opinion, made it even more difficult to break through the clutter of messages that people receive on a daily basis which is why I try to continue to do offbeat things like dress in the Knight suit and walk around downtown with the “Knight Game” sign.

What are some of the innovations that are incorporated into the park that the average fan may not be aware of?

We now have cameras that allow the Dodgers to see every pitch and every at bat in our park. This helps them evaluate talent and help players make adjustments which, hopefully, will allow them to improve and help them reach the Major Leagues. In addition to print at home tickets and the ease of accessing our schedule over the internet (making it less necessary for us to mail out pocket schedules), technology has provided us with the ability to monitor our food sales so closely that waste has been virtually eliminated. We know exactly how many hot dogs, Cokes, peanuts etc. have been sold on any given day and we can order and stock appropriately as a result. The ability to control our inventories in concessions and in the souvenir operation has allowed us to generate savings that give us the ability to keep our prices as low as we can for as long as we can.

Looking back now on the cusp of your tenth season at the park is there anything you would have done differently in the design or layout of the park?

Originally the right field foul pole was supposed to be at the top of the steps located toward the river. The orientation was changed to allow for a public walkway on the outside of the stadium but the result was that more of the fans were facing the setting sun than we originally intended. I know that sun can be tough and wish there was something I could have done to turn the stadium a little further away from the evening sunsets. I also wish we’d been able to afford a slightly larger roof.

Every summer more and more comes to the downtown area besides the obvious one Riverbend. Do you at any time worry that people coming into the downtown district are having their attention spread too thin?

I don’t really worry about that as I think the growth in downtown has largely benefitted me. We just have to keep trying to take advantage of the opportunities that the increase in activity downtown presents for us. Certainly, we have to continue to try and breakthrough the “distractions” but I think that downtown Chattanooga continues to be an amazing and wonderful place.

In your opinion what is the state of sports in Chattanooga?

I try not to worry about questions as big as this one. I am hopeful that things get on track at Finley Stadium and that as a community we can continue to grow our pride in the wonderful competition that takes place locally at the high school and collegiate level.

At one point when fighting for a new stadium there was talk about moving the team out of Chattanooga. How glad are you that you’ve stayed?

I always wanted to stay and wouldn’t have been part of taking the team out of Chattanooga. I would have sold it and watched it leave. I have loved living here and am thrilled it worked out the way it did. I consider Chattanooga to be a wonderful place to live and raise a family and feel very fortunate that I have been able to be a small part of this community. I also feel incredibly grateful that the people of Chattanooga have supported the Lookouts and the work I have tried to do.

What’s the most frequent compliment the organization gets about the ballpark or the way it conducts its business?

The compliment I am most proud of is that a night at the ballpark is the best entertainment bargain in town. If I can make a living providing family entertainment for a maximum ticket price of $8.00 I consider myself to be a very lucky man. We also get compliments on the cleanliness of the facility and the friendliness of our staff which are also very gratifying to me.

Any future plans or promotions you’d like to see come to AT&T Field?

I have more plans than I can fund at this time and the promotions are something that I am constantly thinking about. I am very lucky to love my work and that makes it easy for me to continue to work with my dedicated staff on ways to make coming to our park as enjoyable and entertaining as possible. We must always remember how lucky we are when someone makes the choice to visit the ballpark and we try never to take that for granted. With that in mind, I spend an inordinate amount of time trying to figure out additional ways to attract and entertain people and you will see those come to fruition eventually. I like surprises, however, so I try to keep them to myself until they become reality.

Jeff Dye is a rising star in the comedy scene who has performed all over the country, in 2007 won the Giggles 10th annual Laff Off took 3rd in the Giggles Laff off in 2006 Jeff was also a semi-finalist in the Seattle international comedy comp. Jeff doesn’t use profanity but is very edgy and creative humor takes you in his mind that some have described as a charmingly twisted experience.  Jeff is also a finalist in this season’s Last Comic Standing on NBC.

What is it like being in this competition with all your contemporaries on TV?

It’s been weird. (laughs)  A lot of them I get along with.  I was a big fan of Sean Cullen before I even started doing standup comedy.  For me it’s been really, really fun, too. 

Is there a lot of camaraderie amongst you guys?  I know with bands they tend to be supportive of each other when they tour together.  Are you supportive of each other or are you constantly looking over your shoulder?

At first there was a lot of tension, and we were competing with each other all the time.  We wouldn’t laugh at each other’s jokes when we lived in the house all together because there was definitely that competition vibe.  But at this part in the journey we all get along now and we’re friends and stuff.

What made you decide to do something like this?  Was it a suggestion of an agent or did you watch the show beforehand and think it might be up your alley?

I think every comic knows his Super Bowl is that TV appearance.  You’re going to be seen by tons of people, and if you do really well it’s going to help you do whatever else you’re trying to get into, whether it’s acting, movies, or more bookings.  Any kind of TV, whether it be the Late Show, it used to be [Johnny] Carson.  And this show has created a great opportunity to be seen on network television.  I think you decide when you get into comedy that you want to be seen on regular television.

You’re still a very young guy in the business.  What got you interested in comedy initially?

I felt like in school my best gift was being social, like making friends and making the kids laugh in school.  I really wasn’t good at anything else. (laughs) I needed this.  I’m banking on this.  That’s what I was good at  - making people laugh my whole life, so it felt most natural when I went up there.  I guess I’ve always kind of known.

Were you a prankster of just good at telling stories and making people feel comfortable?

Definitely a prankster.  I pulled a lot of nonsense and it got me in a lot of trouble in school, but it sounded great.  Now I’m getting paid for all the tings I was getting in trouble for in school.

I guess it makes for good stories to tell everyone else.

Oh yes. 

What’s the biggest practical joke you’ve played so far that you’re willing to divulge?

One time we…well, I don’t know actually if I can… (laughs) We tricked these girls in the woods with this deer head.  We took a deer head off one of the cabin walls.  We hung it in between two trees.  We got behind it to shake it.  And when they started to run away from that I was dressed up.  I was on these gigantic stilts and I put this trench coat over myself like in I  Know What You Did Last Summer, and had this big Peter Pan sword, but in the nighttime it looked like a real knife.  And so when they were scared of the deer, they stopped rationally thinking.  They just saw this big scary guy at the end of the path.  After they were scared of the deer running back all terrified they saw me, and they freaked out.  I was proud to say we made a girl pee on herself.  It’s the first one that comes to mind. 

You’re from Seattle.  How funny is Seattle?

Seattle has a great, great comedy scene.  It’s overlooked.  Last Comic Standing never did any auditions in Seattle.  That’s one of my goals.  I want them to come there to find comics.  There are a lot of good young comics.  It’s a diverse crowd, there are a lot of alternative comics and a lot of comedy.  It’s a great, great comedy scene.

How do you deal with all the Starbucks that are in Seattle?

(laughs) Actually we have more coffee shops in that area than any place in the world.  Starbucks isn’t even that popular in Washington.  Actually I started with my friend Andrew Slater, who is another comic from Seattle started another protest of Starbucks recently because they sold the Seattle Supersonics. It’s the same owner.  So Starbucks might be going down.

I was going to ask you about that.  The team being sold out from under you made the news last month.

Yeah.  It was because Starbucks was doing bad with money, so they sold the team.  Not good.

Are you a big sports fan?

Oh yeah.  Big time.

What’s your favorite sport?

I don’t really have a favorite sport.  Just all the Seattle teams – I’m a huge fan.  Now I’m living in L.A.  It was the Seahawks, the Mariners and used to be the Supersonics.  But now I can’t/  I guess football is more exciting.

Do you think you guys will get a basketball team back eventually?

I hear it’s going to be like five or six years.

What are you guys going to do to fill in the gap in the wintertime?

I have no idea.

Hopefully you’ll be too buys touring, I guess and not have to worry about it too much.

(laughs) That’s the goal. 

When everything gets done with Last Comic Standing, what are your future plans?

I’m going to be working on some movies and TV shows, but I can’t really say yet that I’m doing them. 

The TV and the movies, is that a natural progression of what of what you want to do. Or are you more comfortable doing standup?

I would definitely like to be doing feature-like movies, but I’ll always do standup comedy, too.  Standup is like my favorite outlet with my opinions and stuff.  I’d like to get into movies and TV, but I know I could do standup at the same time whenever I want.

Have you seen the movie The Dark Knight?

I was it with Craig Robinson from The Office.  I was at the Montreal Just For Laughs Arts Festival and me and Craig went to go see it.  It was amazing.  You’ve seen it, right?

Yes. If you were going to be a villain in a Batman movie, which one would you be? Or would you create one of your own to fit your personality?

I don’t think anybody can watch that show and not want to be the Joker.  (laughs) That is the most amazing, well-played part.  It was like artwork watching that guy play the Joker.  It was amazing. 

What do you see your character being when you get into films more and television?   Do you see yourself as a specific type of character?  For example Drew Carey was the every man lovable loser, Tommy Chong an old hippie stoner, others that were outsiders, you’ve got Pauley Shore who is a Valley guy, kind of goody character.

I’d like to be likeable.  I want to be known as funny.  Like I can do whatever character, but funny – like Will Ferrell.  Not exactly the same, but when you see him, you say, ahh, this is going to be a funny movie.  I’d like to have that reputation when people see me first.

 - Dave Weinthal

Ted Neeley is a drummer, singer, actor, and composer. Neeley is best known for his vocal range and his role in Norman Jewison's 1973 film Jesus Christ Superstar. In the Broadway version of the stage musical he was the Christ understudy, and in the Los Angeles stage version he played the title role of Jesus Christ. Twenty years after first playing the role, Neeley gained renewed success, and a new generation of fans, in the lead role of Jesus in the 1990s touring company of Jesus Christ Superstar. This modernized version of the original production included a day-glow temple scene, and a glass crucifixion cross that elevated above the stage and was lit from within. From 1992 to 1997, the hugely successful tour criss-crossed the nation multiple times. Once again, Neeley is headlining another critically acclaimed production of Jesus Christ Superstar.

How so you go from being a rock drummer originally to Jesus,, so to speak?

(laughs) You just make sure you guide your band in the right direction where opportunity knocks.  Then you’ve got to make sure your door’s open when it does.  Literally, I just fell into it from being the musician with the band.  We worked out way from Texas to California one summer.  When I got to California, it was the summer that those wonderful, horrible things were going on with the Vietnam War and all the protests.  The show Hair was on the market.  They were looking for somebody who could hit high notes and sing rock and roll, so I got the call. 

What kind of music did your band play?

We were a cover band.  We played everybody.  Anything you heard on the radio at the time we would attempt to do.  If we didn’t know it, they would hum a few bars and we’d get on to it.  Literally, people would request songs and we’d do them – anything they heard.

What was your favorite music/musician growing up?

Oh, that’s really hard to isolate into any one thing.  We literally did everybody’s music – anything that was contemporary – certainly contemporary music.  Anything that was being played on the radio at the time was my favorite.  We sole from everybody, Dave. (laughs)

I understand you originally tried out for the role of Judas. 

That’s correct.  I had been in the show Hair for three years prior to Superstar and had the opportunity and the pleasure of working with the magnificent director Tom O’Horgan, who was the director and co-creator of Hair with Gerome Ragne and Galt McDermott.  He’s just a magnificent human being.  He also directed Jesus Christ Superstar.  When he got it together he called a bunch of us in the Hair company and said I want you guys to come be in the show.  The producers don’t know your work, so pick up the album and learn a song.  That’s what I did.  I listened to the album and really thought the character of Judas was a great challenge.  I had no desire whatever to attempt the role of Jesus, because I knew everybody in the world knows something about Jesus.  Few people know very much about Judas, so it was a challenge for me.  I also like the songs that the Judas character sings.  So I went back to New York, sang “Heaven on Their Minds”, which is the opening song of the score and felt really comfortable with what I was able to do.  My dear friend Tom O’Horgan, the director, threw his arms around me and said, “That was Great!  But I’d like you to come back tomorrow and sing the other guy.”  And I’ve been singing the other guy ever since.

In the South, especially the early ‘70s Jesus Christ Superstar was kind of controversial, especially to fundamentalist Christians did not take kindly to the story of Jesus being set in a rock opera situation.  What were your thoughts portraying Jesus originally?

It was remarkable because it was everywhere the show played when we first opened in New York on Broadway we were picketed every single night – not by just a couple of guys but people eight to ten deep stretched all the way around the block.  And it certainly seemed, even in New York they were concerned about our destroying the religious fiber of the community.  The people I would pass by as I pushed my way into the theatre to go to work I would ask if they had seen the show.  They said of course they had not.  Then I would invite them to come in as my guests and take a look.  Those that did come in loved the show.  And that sort of response happened from the first time we performed it to today.  And over the generations – and that was in the ‘70s, mind you, and since the film came out in ’73 it reached a broader audience instantaneously as films do and it let the general population see it wasn’t what they were concerned with, that it in fact was a concept very brilliantly pulled out of the first four books of the New Testament by Tim Rice.  He focused primarily on the book of John and took the language that everybody finds a little difficult in church coming from the pulpit – especially children who fall asleep during that process. Tim took that language out of the text and translated it into  a language that was understandable, and the lyrics of the songs Andrew Lloyd Webber came along and put melodies to those words everyone could sing, and therefore gave a comfort zone about Jesus as seen through the eye of his friend.  If you will, Tim put humanity in the role of Christ.  We took him basically off the stain glass window and put him in the streets where he walked.  People found through that human approach to the man called Jesus as seen through the eyes of his contemporaries, his friends, his foes.  It was something everyone could easily understand, and today his has been used for years as a teaching tool because they know children can more easily learn about spirituality through listening to this music and watching this film.

You’ve been involved with both, the theatrical version and film version of Jesus Christ Superstar.  Do you think the translation from stage to screen was handled well?

I think it was brilliantly done.  I think it was absolutely magnificently done in first production in New York from album to live performance, because after all it did start out as a rock opera concept album – not the first of its kind.  Tommy certainly preceded it, but it was the first of its kind to be produced as a theatrical staged event. That alone was an amazing accomplishment again by Tom O’Horgan and Robin Wagner.  Then Norman Jewison, who made the film, came along and purchased the film rights, not only produced and directed the film, but also wrote the screenplay.  And I thought he did an absolutely brilliant translation into film, and through which introduced the whole piece to the world, not just the cities in America that we actually played live.  So I think in every case that I’ve been the grateful recipient of the opportunity to be in both productions, and in this particular case doing it again after all this time.  People pay tribute to this film every single night.  The majority of the people who come see the show are huge supporters and fans of the film, and have been since the ‘70s, and that’s what keeps this tour out going as long as it has been.

Do you do anything different today to prepare for the role of Jesus Christ than when you first got involved with the production over 30 years ago?

I think the best response to that question to that quite honestly, Dave is just that I’ve been alive.  There’s nothing in the world better than experience of living and by virtue and what I have experienced since the ‘70s that makes my commitment to my character so much more deeply felt and so much more personal, because of the fact that I am a father, a husband, and I have made so many friends in the world, and especially in the continental United States and Canada as a result of being a part of this.  It makes everything so much more important and so much more present, and so much more deeply felt, because I know and have been told since the ‘70s that people everywhere have been so positively influenced by watching this movie or listening to the soundtrack, or coming to see us live.  There’s nothing more rewarding than to talk to people every single night and hear them give you recounts of wonderful experiences that they had as a result of watching this film.

Do or did you worry about being too closely associated with Jesus?

Not at all.  I guess it’s the common denominator in terms of a career answer would be, who better than Jesus to be associated with? (laughs) But just in terms of a life experience it could not be better.  I have friends everywhere as a result of this.  People treat me with such respect no matter where I go because of this.  It’s given me the opportunity to continually readdress a magnificent role and be part of a wonderful show that allows me that avenue of communication with total strangers that do become to some extent my friends.

Portraying Jesus for so many years did you ever become self-conscious about how you carried on in your personal life?

The expectation is sometimes absolutely amazing, but it hasn’t been problematic at all.  It’s something that I welcome and I’m honored that people connect me with something.  And as I said earlier what better character to be connected with?  And it’s mainly because of the familiarity, because everybody as you well know Dave, has their own interpretation of the man, Jesus Christ.  And whether they believe in him as the Son of God or an extremely outspoken man of his time, it doesn’t matter. Even if they don’t believe at all it doesn’t matter.  When they sit down in one of these theaters and observe  this production it touches them very, very deeply.  And I get to be one of the central focuses of that particular experience.  There’s nothing more rewarding.  I don’t think it could be any more rewarding than this.

Looking at Jesus Christ Superstar today, when it came out in the early ‘70s it was groundbreaking the way they’ve taken the story out of the Bible and modernized it.  Here we are in 2008 is there something that you would update about the production to make it fit the twenty-first century better?  Is there anything you would do to change it?

 Absolutely not.  I would not change a thing and here is why: The story is, as I said, adapted from the New Testament and extremely beautifully done by Tim Rice.  And the music in itself is timeless as well.  So you have a timeless story, the greatest story ever told, about the world’s most significant icon told in contemporary music terms.  There’s no dialogue.  It’s all music.  It’s all songs.  All the dialogue and stories told are through the lyrics of the songs.  Just the fact Tim and Andrew was to place the music is a contemporary rock music form, which was in the late ‘60s, early ‘70s, that alone is what contemporizes it.  That alone updates the piece to today.  And though the sound of the music certainly reflects the time it was written – the ‘60s and early ‘70s, it is as contemporary today as it first came out.  As you know, the rock music form hasn’t changed except that rap jumped in there and became the central focus of contemporary music.  All other music, whether country, rock or blues still stems from that same music form.  And I’ve got to tell you, that people who come to see the show – those with whom I get to speak with, anyway, don’t want you to touch it at all.  They want to see it just like they saw it in the film.  They want to hear it just like they did on the original album and the film soundtrack.  I’m the one who constantly says don’t change a thing guys.  Leave it as it was initially.

How does it feel to have been Jesus longer than Jesus?

(laughs)  I don’t know how to compare that, you know, because you know I’m the rock and roll drummer from Texas who hits high notes and is lucky enough to get to be able to pretend that magnificent each night.  It certainly feels good to be alive other than the other option, I’ll tell you that.   And I am honored, honestly.  I’m the person who is most amazed that the public in general will accept me still playing the role.  And I could not be more thankful.

Are you still actively involved with music outside of the theater?

Absolutely.  If I’m not onstage doing this or some other play or musical, I’m in the studio somewhere with somebody and playing with the musicians or doing background vocals, singing harmonies, producing or whatever.  I’m always involved in music one way, shape or form.

You’ve done some composing as well, haven’t you?

Yes, I have.  I’ve been fortunate to have been called upon to deliver songs for film and television, and other artists as well.  I’m amazed that people assumed I could do it because I’m a singer.  They gave me the opportunity and fortunately I was able to step up to the plate and deliver what they’re looking for.  I am if not the most fortunate, certainly one of the most fortunate people on the face of the earth that has been able to sustain my family and pay the rent all my entire adult life.

When your time comes and you go to the pearly gates, what do you think Jesus might say to you when he meets you?

Probably, “Would you mind cleaning those knobs a little bit better there.  I need them to shine a little more.”  I have no idea.  I would hope that I would at least be acknowledged, you know?  Anything more than that, and when you say the pearly gates, I hope I am fortunate enough to get somewhere near there.  And I sincerely hope that what I’ve had the honor of doing this particular project, I would get some sort of acknowledgment.  Maybe I helped a little bit for some people to find a better way to treat themselves and to live their lives.

 - Dave Weinthal