Dear Rocco Advice Column – March 2020
I am 20 years old and my boyfriend tells me that he loves me and we are perfect together. We are both waiting until marriage for sex. Unfortunately, I often wake up because he is touching me inappropriately while I am sleeping. I confront him about it and we end up fighting. I don’t know what to do anymore.
Why are you sleeping in the same bed together? That should be reserved to marriage if you two are truly saving yourself for marriage. I realize today anything goes so people sleep together, but usually that includes sex. I’m not sure whose idea it was to sleep in the same bed. If it was you, you are basically teasing him and I’m sorry any red-blooded American boy no matter how righteous he may think he is always has sex on his mind and you tempting him is making it near impossible for him to remain chaste – not that he shouldn’t respect your space. If it was his idea, it was a bad one. It may have been his way – even if only subconsciously to sample to goods before buying them. For the time being if you guys are going to live under the same roof it is best to sleep in separate beds. Otherwise you need to go back to your parents unless you both decide the time is right to consummate your relationship.
I know a guy a lot of people didn’t like. Neither did I. I was jealous of him. He was recently killed in a fire. I know it’s not my fault but I feel horrible because I didn’t like him…and now he is dead. I feel so bad.
How would it have been your fault? You didn’t set him on fire… did you? Why were you jealous of him? Perhaps deep down you don’t like yourself deep down. It’s natural to feel bad when someone we know dies unless they were a horrible human being. Without knowing the complete circumstances behind his death I can’t tell you how to feel. There should be a sense of sorrow and empathy and then it’s time to move on with your life. If they weren’t that important to you there is no reason to dwell.
My best friend wants to be a singer and she is really good. I ‘m afraid that when we grow up, she might become famous and not remember me. What do I do?
Become her manager that way the two of you can be together a whole lot and she’ll have to pay you 20 percent. No reason you shouldn’t cash in if you can help her in the long run.
I am a divorced mother of a 6-year-old daughter. My ex and I have been apart for approximately four years. During our separation, he went to court and had it ordered that I could not move from this state with our daughter. I do have sole custody of my daughter. Now, I have plans on remarrying. My fiancé is a lawyer who is planning to accept a job offer in another state. What are my chances? I am willing to negotiate visitation so that my daughter’s father can spend quality time during her summer vacation and spring break. Please advise!
Why are you asking me this? Didn’t you state that your fiancé is an attorney? Unless he is one of those ambulance chasers with a 1-800 number with billboards all over town if he doesn’t know or can negotiate terms with your ex so you guys can move, he should know someone whose specialty is situations like yours. Also without knowing your history with your ex I don’t want to tell you something stupid that could cause you to lose custody. In cases like these I suggest you leave it to the professionals.
Rocco is a common sense, tell-it-like-it-is, no-nonsense kind of guy offering real advice on any subject put before him. Why pay thousands of dollars on a high-priced therapist when he’ll straighten you out for free. If you’d like advice from Rocco e-mail him at firstname.lastname@example.org.